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I haven’t posted here in a while

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I had a really weird vivid dream last night. I dreamed that I had wrote a very short poem about suicide and my school found it and I had got sent to the principals office and they were going to send me to a ward but I convinced them not to. I was texting my close friend about the situation and he freaked out on me. He told me that he didn’t want to talk to me anymore because I made him a boring person and he needed to hang out with more interesting people because I wasn’t enough. He said everything I talked about him was pointless and stupid and that I was worthless. My response to that was I hope you can find someone as empathetic as me to comfort you, and for some reason I vividly remember spelling out “empathetic” which isn’t normal for my dreams, usually in my dreams I can’t read or write anything. After I said this to him, he called me and yelled at me and I woke up from him yelling.
If anyone understand wax interpretation, pls help, I was meditating with a candle like focusing on it and I noticed it was making weird shapes going towards my hand which was under the candle so I put my hand like directly under it and like thought for the candle wax to spill onto my hand and it did, but it keeps making these root like shapes, what could that mean?
Here’s a really cute picture of my cat to make someone happy.
kids can be pretty scary... today I woke up super sick with many signs of COVID. I’m getting tested later tonight. However, yesterday as I was walking my dog with my younger brother he asked me “would you rather die or get corona” because he likes to randomly ask woukd you rather questions, and I said I’d rather get corona because not everyone dies from it..... imagine if I had told him I’d rather die?

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🍓Strawberry Milk Boba Tea 🍓
(made with coconut and almond milk!!)
I made the syrup for the tapioca pearls with coconut shavings and strawberry slices to add a little extra ~flavor~ and it tasted to good ?! I usually just make the syrup with white sugar and water (like normal simple syrup) but I wanted to see how it’d go if I added more flavors and it went really well. It’s SUPER sweet, though, so if you don’t have a sweet tooth I don’t think you’d enjoy it. The strawberry milk tea was made with 1 cup coconut milk creamer, 3 cups almond milk, and one cup orange tea and green tea mix (2 green tea bags and 1 orange tea bag) and just regular hearsheys strawberry syrup.
Saw this trend on tiktok that was like ,
“If you were a deity, what kind of offerings would you prefer?”
For me, I would want cheese balls, you to have a good skin care routine, random rocks and twigs, butter cup flowers, and art work. And Apple cinnamon scented candles.
50 Spells
Money Spell: Mix basil and baking soda together. Use it as a carpet sprinkle before vacuuming to increase the flow of money to your home.
Protection Spell: Bury quartz crystals pointing outwards at the four corners of your property line to keep evil away from your home.
Good Dream Spell: Eat a pinch of thyme before bed or place a sprig of it under your pillow, and you will have sweet dreams.
Money Spell: Roll paper or plastic money towards you around a cinnamon stick to bring in more money.
Healing Spell: Carry juniper berries with you to ward against illness.
Protection Spell: Hang a bit of dried ginger in the kitchen to ward evil spirits.
Money Spell: Simmer cinnamon, nutmeg, and allspice in water on the stove to ensure prosperity of your home.
Good Luck Spell: Burn allspice as an incense to draw money or luck to you, as well as speed healing.
Love Spell: Cut an apple in half, and give one half to your love to ensure a prosperous and loving relationship.
Beauty Spell: Carry cloves with you to let your inner beauty shine outward.
Love Spell: Watermelon is an aphrodisiac, especially for men.
Love Spell: Eat fresh figs as an aphrodisiac.
Good Luck Spell: Place a piece of cotton in your sugar bowl to draw good luck to your house.
Love Spell: Celery is a great male aphrodisiac.
Lost Item Charm: Carry a sprig of rosemary in your pocket when you need to find something.
Protection Spell: Scatter dried chili peppers or cayenne pepper around your house to keep harm away.
Pregnancy Spell: Carrying a twig of raspberry leaves will help ease the pains of pregnancy.
Purification Spell: Add a little salt to your carpet sprinkle or floor wash to purify a room.
Rain Spell: Sprinkle water into the air using the bristles of a broom to make it rain.
Healing Charm: Carry ginger root in your pocket or purse all winter to ward against colds.
Wellness Spell: Drink amethyst-infused water during the day, before drinking, to lighten the effects of intoxication.
Healing Charm: Place a garlic braid in your home to help keep illness away.
Concentration Spell: Chew fennel seeds to help you concentrate.
Good Luck Spell: Carry a piece of dried pineapple in a green bag to draw luck to you.
Divination Charm: Ask an orange a yes or no question before you eat it, then count the seeds. If there are an even number of seeds, the answer is no. If there are an odd number of seeds, the answer is yes.
Fertility Spell: Eat avocados to ensure fertility.
Garden Spell: Sprinkle oats in your garden to ensure that your garden will be plentiful.
Love Spell: Eat mangos to increase libido.
Protection Spell: Plant thyme around your house to act as natural wards.
Relaxation Charm: Drink lavender, chamomile, and passion fruit tea to decrease anxiety.
Psychic Ability Charm: Sleep with mugwort under your pillow to bring psychic dreams.
Purification Spell: Add apple cider vinegar, baking soda, and epsom salt to your bathwater for purification.
Psychic Ability Spell: Eat raw chocolate to increase your psychic powers.
Psychic Ability Spell: Carry a herkimer diamond to increase your psychic powers.
Healing Spell: Cure hiccups by breathing in peppermint essential oil.
Protection Spell: Sprinkle cayenne pepper dust under your doormat to keep unwanted people from entering your home.
Happiness Spell: Evoke a feeling of optimism by breathing in peppermint essential oil..
Aromatherapy Charms: Add pink himalayan sea salt and a few drops of your favorite essential oil to a glass vial to make an instant aromatherapy oil inhaler.
Love Spell: Place pepper inside a piece of cotton and set it shut to make a charm to bring back a lost love.
Money Charm: Draw an infinity symbol on a square piece of paper, fold it towards you, and put it into your wallet to increase your wealth.
Purification Spell: Cut an onion in half and hide both halves inside your home to remove harmful vibes.
Healing Spell: Place a sliced onion under the bed of an ill person to help draw out the illness.
Pentacle Charm: Cut an apple in half for an instant altar pentacle.
Prosperity Spell: Add dried basil to your carpet sprinkle to increase prosperity.
Beauty Spell: Crawl backwards three times underneath a blackberry or mulberry tree branch to help remove acne.
Beauty Spell: Make a face mask out of ground dried oatmeal, powdered milk, warm honey, and water to soften the skin and clear the complexion.
Purification Charm: Carry a piece of black tourmaline to help purify and remove harmful energies in the space around you.
Purification Charm: Keep your pink himalayan salt lamp on for as long as possible to get the best benefit from the lamp.
Protection Charm: Carry a peach pit to ward off harmful energies.
Protection Charm: Carry a walnut to strengthen your brain.
Blessed Be,
Lilac
Picture of a candle spell I was doing ✌️😌
I’m not gonna explain it bc I feel like it’s too personal to but I thought it looked really pretty and I’m really happy with the outcome so I just wanted to share❤️
I don’t understand the way my brain works. I have you and all of my friends, then I have everything I need. I’m happy. I have all my friends but not you and suddenly I’m all alone. I have no one. I have nothing. Why is no one else good enough, when even you aren’t good enough? Why do I need you so much?

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Just Breathe
I breathe-
Full of fire are my lungs.
I lie-
Twisted words slip off my tongue.
I dream-
Sounds of my demons remain unsung.
But whos to hear when no one’s here?
With each of these words,
A new thought begins to sprout.
In each of these lines,
There’s a different way for me to cry out.
But who's to hear when I hide in fear?
This world is too cruel,
I wish I could just disappear…
Now let me make that clear,
Did I say it loud enough?
Maybe you just didn’t hear.
Because listen to me now,
I’m drowning in my tears.
This room’s too small,
There’s just not enough space for you up here.
But that’s okay,
Maybe you’ll be my volunteer,
The next puppeteer,
Controlling me like I’m not even here.
How the fuck am I supposed to escape these thoughts when they just reappear.
I’m trapped in my mind with nowhere to hide.
I’d say that I’m fine, but you should know that I lied.
Please help me down before all is dead inside.
I sound crazy, but just hear me out.
I’ve got a voice and I’ll use it to shout.
I’ve got a mind, so I’ll figure things out.
I can’t do this alone, but you’re nowhere near.
Please help me down, I’m consumed by the fear…
The fear of being alone, that is,
Yet I try not to speak,
Because every word just turns it’s back at me.
It’s making me weak, this heaviness on my feet.
I’m being held down, who's to set me free?
Console me,
Rebuild me,
Control me,
Just to break me.
Drop me,
Release me,
I’ll remain falling until someone can reach me.
But until that is, I’ll stay here falling.
Just so you can come back here and break me again.
I speak-
What lies in my soul is now on the run.
I see-
To many versions of myself that have yet to be hung.
I feel-
This unforgiving guilt that can’t be undone.
~~~~~~~~~
This is a poem I made about my current relationship and dealing with trusting myself to make the right decision and not being able to trust my partner to help me. Every breath I take feels like a reminder that I made so many mistakes and every time I talk to him it feels like I’m fooling myself over and over again. Every time I talk about him and tell people I hate him I know it’s the truth but I can’t deny the fact that I still love him. I’m so conflicted...
Btw all photos I post are my own, and it’s perfectly fine to repost them. I don’t care if it’s credited or not. However, any time I post a photo that’s not mine I’ll probably say it’s not my photo and if I know who the oc is I’ll tag them as well.
People are flipping about the upcoming lock down acting like it’s gonna be such a drastic change,, as if we haven’t been supposed to be limiting as much social actions as we can already 😳😳 people are stupid i swear, the United States did an absolutely terrible job at controlling the spread of the virus and I puke by be surprised if it lasts up until the end of 2021 and even goes into 2022.
He told me that he loved me again and at first I was so happy, I felt like things are going to change, they’re finally going to get better. Then I remembered how selfish he is. How little hes done to help me. How much hes done to hurt me. And after that every “I love you” that he said felt like a shot to my heart. He said it over and over again without feeling the heaviness I carried and the change in my tone, he said it so many times I broke down. Why am I letting myself be so hurt be him? Why did he have to be the one I fall in love with, when will it get better? Will it ever get better?
✨Yes/No Tarot tips✨
Here are some ideas to help you answer those pesky Yes/No questions using Tarot. These are just ways that I’ve found work for me and Yes/No card interpretations that have always given me the answers I seek. Sometimes, this varies from reader to reader, so use this as a springboard to find out what works for you!
If you pull a Yes card in reverse, it could indicate a “Yes, BUT…” or a “Yes, IF…”. You’ll need to understand what each card means in reverse to determine the caveat for a reversed Yes card.
Pay attention to the positive meanings for each No card. Sometimes, things aren’t as clear cut as a simple No. Sometimes, it becomes a “No, but…” and gives you clues about how you can change your No into a Yes.
If you pull a Maybe card, you can often get a feel for your options either way by drawing additional cards to go on either side. For example: Two of Swords is a Maybe card and often represents a difficult choice between two options. You can draw two cards to set on either side of this card that represent the two choices and their pros and cons.
YES
Major Arcana: Fool, Magician, High Priestess, Emperor, Empress, Lovers, Chariot, Strength, Hermit, Star, Sun, Judgement, World
Cups: Ace, two, three, six, nine, ten, page, knight, queen, king
Pentacles: Ace, three, six, eight, nine, ten, page, knight, queen, king
Swords: Ace, page, knight
Wands: Ace, two, three, four, six, eight, page, knight, queen, king
NO
Major Arcana: Death, Devil, Tower, Moon
Cups: Five, eight
Pentacles: Four, five
Swords: Three, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten
Wands: Five, seven, ten
MAYBE
Major Arcana: Hierophant, Justice, Hanged Man, Wheel of Fortune, Temperance
Cups: Four, seven
Pentacles: Two, seven
Swords: Two, four, queen, king
Wands: Nine
🌚 NEW MOON RITUALS 🌚
The New Moon is the start of a new lunar month; moon energy decreases to a minimum, so we can feel a breakdown
+ 🌑 Best day for making long term plans and fortune spells
+ 🌑 On New Moon, prepare for entry into new lunar month by cleaning and ridding your environment of unnecessary things the day before and clearing negative energy
+ 🌑 Purify your home with scent/smoke, mantras/affirmations, sounds/music/bells, candles
+ 🌑 Cleanse body physically and spiritually: bath/sauna, clean clothes, mediate to streamline thoughts
+ 🌑 New Moon favourable for letting go of toxic patterns and addictions, unfavourable for new affairs and confrontation
+ 🌑 Make a special notebook for the lunar month
+ 🌑 Vision board: clippings, images, words, keep in open area where you see often
+ 🌑 Write wishes in present tense, next New Moon cross wishes out that come true and write new ones, always thank the universe
+ 🌑 Write wish out on piece of paper, recite it aloud to the universe for help, hide it and burn it when it comes true
+ 🌑 Health ritual: put a basin/bucket out on window-ledge over night on the night of New Moon. In the morning pour the water that has been collected from head to toe. Ritual is believed to charge one with vital force.
💰Cash Rituals:💰
> 💸 On the New Moon, put money on window-ledge over night until the Young Moon appears. Then, spend it while urging the funds to return multiplied.
> 💸 You can also use the energy of the Growing Moon, each night from the New Moon up to the Full Moon leave your wallet on your window-ledge
> 💸 Take a paper bill, look or go outside, show it to the New Moon and ask for help. Then carry in your wallet until next New Moon.
* 🌘 Young Moon= the first sight of the moon after the New Moon
Source: Moonly App

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Blood
The metallic smell on my fingers,
From the blade or the blood?
It runs so easily through the layers of pain,
It causes a new distraction to tame my brain.
The blood drips down my thigh,
Oh no,
I stained my sheets,
And my shirt?
Oh well,
Now the memories of this night
Are forever stained on the fabric of this mattress
As a reminder of the pain I wished to ignore.
I run the blade over old scars from the years before,
The bumps in my skin make it harder to glide.
The new scars will forever remind me of my mistakes.
I wished to get rid of the old ones,
So I covered them with a new brand.
This time, heart break.
~ original poem ~
It’s not the best, but it’s a good representation of how I feel. So many bad things flowing through my mind, and for some reason the solution my brain seems to think is best is to tear apart my skin. It’s like I want to break apart pieces of myself to release the parts I don’t want to keep in anymore. It’s clawing at me from the inside but no one can see, so I show that the pain is dying to break free by trying to help it release itself. It only works for the moment that the blade hits my skin, once it’s gone, it’s like the pain was brand new again.
I have a million different kinds of fun, when I’m asleep and in a dream that I’m you’re only one.. can we create something beautiful, and destroy it?
。・゜・(ノД`)・゜・。
bruh,, I like when I’m able to relate to the meaning of a song, but I hate when I like a sad song that later in life gains meaning. people suck. im big sad
this is my own photo btw