A Series of Mispronounced Words

one time at a funeral i panicked and said the first drink i could think of and the bartender made me the pina colada With all the fixings all the trims all the bells and whistles i didnt even ask imagine youre at a funeral and the person besides you is drinking a pina colada with whip cream as tall as the drink with a cherry and an umbrella, thats what happened to me

Where's it made? Who brought it here? How much were they paid? Who makes it? Is it made in separate parts and put together? How much were they all paid to do this? Where do they get the materials? Who paid for that? Who brings it there? How much were they paid? Who streamlined the base materials? How much were they paid? Who gathered the base materials? Where? How much were they paid? Is it good for them? Is it good for us? Is it good for the land? Is it necessary? Is it biodegradable? How much does it hurt? Do I need it? Do I even want it?

the bowl before you has been prepared

When i was 13 i decided to become penpals with the surviving members of the heavens gate cult who were still maintaining their email/website/book sales and they responded to me a couple of times before my mom found out and i genuinely couldnt fathom why she would be upset with me

I just had 3 crackers with chutney and sharp white cheddar . Then i had a ring of pineapple. I started to levitate, but i wasnt scared. Im not scared of anything

You just hate me because the patterns on my clothes move around like they do on chowder and yours don’t