Big Butt. Bigger Heart.

the energy of ordering food via drive thru and then eating it in your car in the parking lot is so powerful. like you could walk 50 feet and sit at a table in the light but we just stan alienation in this country

me hunched over in the dunkin parking lot like a goblin, devouring an old fashioned donut in the dim orange light of the streetlamps, abba blasting,

This post isn’t written in any known human language

I know exactly what was said here

This is such a reach are straight men ok

they’re not

uh? there’s no healer lmao

wym dr phil is right there

Memes have become so heavily context-dependent that they briefly spawned a side-phenomenon of corporations mistakenly assuming that the image combinations are simply random, and that “randomness” is what the new generation finds humorous, and then deliberately creating nonsense ads in a desperate attempt to appeal to the youth, which went on for several years before they finally started hiring younger social media managers.

STOP 👏 MAKING 👏 SHOWS 👏 DARK 👏 FOR 👏 THE 👏 “”””AESTHETIC”””” 👏 I 👏 CAN’T 👏 SEE

IT’S BECAUSE THEY’RE FRED & DAPHNE

FUCK YOU AND YOUR BITTER JEALOUS LONELINESS HOWARD STERN

YES SO GOOD!!!!!

I’m still proud of the fact that a couple of years ago, I tweeted to Sarah Michelle Gellar and asked if Stern had paid up on his bet. To my great surprise, she actually replied and said he hadn’t and he owed them money. 😂😂

“Best friend” is a weird way to say married, but I did enjoy Captain Marvel a lot.

It was during the 90s during the height of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell, okay?

That is…honestly the best explanation Ive had for coding them as a couple but not openly saying it

Explains why I’m so fucking stupid

no, not like ‘stupid’ brain damage. your emotions become so stressful your brain starts getting a little numb to them. you start experiencing higher rates of apathy. you can also have further trouble with memory and problem-solving.

That Explains Why I’m So Fucking Stupid

$50,000 immediately dropped into my bank account wouldn't improve EVERYTHING but boy it sure would be a grand, sexy little start to a good, happy life path, don't you think

Reblog for unexpected $$$ dropping into your Bank account.

one thing i love about queen is that 80% of the time, they never look like they’re dressed for the same event 

You know what makes me mad? I used to work at Pizza hut and everyday we would have to throw away perfectly good pizza or potato wedges or garlic bread in the bin because it was the wrong order or the customer had changed their mind. They made us bin the whole thing. We weren’t allowed to put it aside to eat from or take it home (we all earned minimum wage so it’s not like we culd afford pizza that expensive a lot). But what makes me even madder is that they could easily give that to the homeless or poor. Like, if a homeless person came into the store, we could have easily given him one of the 20 or so pizzas that we would be binning every single day anyway. Imagine all the pizza hut stores in the world. Imagine each and every one throwing away on average 20 pizzas a day. Imagine how many people that would feed. Fuck corporations man.

Capitalism is violence.

Grocery stores almost always throw out food when it reaches the expiration date, and most of them destroy it so no one can take it from the dumpster and eat it. Literally, destroying food so no one gets to eat without paying for it. My local Stop & Shop does this.

c a p i t a l i s m    i s    v i o l e n c e

one of the top tricks homeless people learn is to stakeout the bins behind pizza hut and little ceasars- during the high traffic times for ‘wrong’ pizzas at hut, and during low traffic times for ceasars for the hot and readies that dont sell and are getting ‘old’ you probably were feeding people who needed it, but in a more degrading and less sanitary way

CAPITALISM IS VIOLENCE

@gigglestick Me taking Luna grocery shopping