Awesome Sauce

"On the Job" is going to be PUBLISHED.

Step one is de-Star Wars-ifying it which will happen at the same time as Step 2: new chapters. Here's an excerpt:

The Tacer smelled like fish. Tacers always smelled like fish. The rotund male wiped a string of drool from his chin. For a second the ink black skin of his flashed under the dense white fur covering his body. This was how Tacers sweat, but Rhea couldn’t tell if the scrapper was sweating from the warm weather or from the offer she had proposed. Behind him, a cooling unit hummed out frozen air. It was losing its battle with Gremlyn’s arid climate. The Tacer’s shop was open-air, like all the shops in this part of the city.

Rhea set her fists on the table among tech fragments from a dozen worlds. “What do you think? Do we have a deal?” she asked. Her dark eyes didn’t blink as she spoke. Bound back with a head wrap, her irdu tendrils shifted nervously.

The Tacer scratched the back of his neck with short claws, more drool running down his chin. “A couple of inquiries have come in about this,” he mused.

“But I can buy it now,” Rhea cut in. “Give me an hour to get the payment from my ship and I’ll take it off your hands today.”

The Tacer rolled his eyes in her direction. His merchant’s mind was at work. “I’d need a reservation fee,” he said.

Rhea’s lip twitched. She should have expected this. The battery link wasn’t worth its weight in credits for the raw materials inside. But that wasn’t why she was interested in it. She suspected that wasn’t why anyone was interested in it.

“How much?” she asked, irdu squirming.

The Tacer pretended to think, scratching his fur. “Ten percent sounds fair,” he said.

Internally, Rhea’s head dropped, but on the outside she didn’t flinch. This purchase was already costing her far more than she’d anticipated, and there wasn’t even a guarantee it would pay off. Ten percent more would leave her eating rehydrated noodles for at least a month. But she would live.

“Fine,” she agreed. She straightened her back, rising up half a meter above the diminutive Tacer. “Do I have your word you won’t sell it until I get back?”

The Semi Revelation of Maul:

Kanan: Where’s Ezra?

Maul: You mean, my apprentice.

[Throws lightsaber at Kanan.]

[Saber stops right in front of his face.]

Kanan: Wow.

Maul: HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE?!

Ahsoka: No way!

[Pans over to show Obi-Wan Kenobi.]

Kanan and Ahsoka: Master Kenobi!

Maul: Aw c’mon man! I never get to do anything cool! [Runs off]

Ezra: [Runs up] MAUL TRICKED US! [Pauses] Hey, who’s the desert hobo? [Referring to Obi-Wan.]

*********************

The Death of Eighth Brother:

[Lightsaber handle broken, runs and jumps off the edge. Helicoptersaber breaks in midair. He falls.]

Eighth Brother: [From below] I’m fine! Just a broken leg! But I’m oo-kay!

*****************

Getting the Sith Holocron:

Maul: Trust me!

Ezra: [Jumps]

Maul: [Grabs Ezra’s hand.]

[Long pause as it goes from Maul to Ezra; creating suspension.]

Maul: See ya! [Let’s go of Ezra.]

Ezra: [While falling] I KNEW THIS WOULD HAPPEN!!!

Maul: [Skips off happily with the Holocron.] Lalalala!

********************

Finding the Holocron:

[Maul Force-throws Ezra, but under shoots (causing him to fall into the pit).]

********************

Meeting Maul:

Maul: I know where you are; You’re with me.

Ezra: Well, you seem shady! I’ll trust you!

********************

Vader’s Dramatic Entrance:

Ezra: You think you’re trying to hard?

Vader: W-what? Nooooo. No of course not!

Ezra: Really? Because that was a bit egotistical.

Vader: Oh. Wow. Really? Because I was going for that “strike fear into your heart” kind of vibe.

Ezra: [Shaking his head] Yeah, no.

Vader: [Droops whole body (the cartoon sadness pose).]

**********************

The Beginning of the Vader-Ahsoka Fight:

Vader: Revenge is not the Jedi way.

Ahsoka: I am no Jedi.

Ezra and Kanan: OOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

Or:

Vader: Our long awaited meeting has come at last….Snips.

Ahsoka: [Throws down her sabers dramatically] OH HEEELLLL NO! YOU THINK YOU CAN GO OVER TO THE DARK SIDE, AND HAVE THE AUDACITY TO CALL ME “SNIPS”? NO1 I’m done! [Leaves]

Ezra and Kanan: OOOOO!!!

**********************

When the Sith Holocron is Put in Place and is Causing Destruction:

Ezra: Oh no. This is bad! This is very very bad! I have screwed up big time! Oh! Kanan’s never gonna let me forget this! He’s gonna “I told you so” so hard!

********************

Blind Badass Kanan vs. Maul:

Maul: Running again, Lady Tano?

Ahsoka: If you wanna finish our fight, you’ll have to deal with him first.

[Pans over to Kanan, but in his place is Daredevil.]

******************

But, This Is How It Really Should Have Ended:

Rex: I can be there in two rotations.

Ahsoka: I’m not alone, Rex. [Has glimpses of the future: Maul; Kanan being blinded; the Anakin/Vader helmet moment.] On second thought….

[Cuts to everyone on the Ghost; unharmed.]

Kanan: Man, it sure is a good thing you last minute called for help Ahsoka.

Sabine: Yeah, could you imagine the mess Ezra would’ve caused otherwise?

[They all laugh.]

Ezra: [As the laughter dies down.] I’m gullible.

**********************

Post Credits Scene:

Maul: Really? Helicopter lightsabers?

Seventh Sister: What….what’s wrong with them?

Ezra: I don’t know; they just seem super inconvenient.

Fifth Brother: Whaaaaat? Nooooo. No. They’re….they’re cool….

Maul: No. They are not.

[Eighth Brother finally reaches the top after climbing back up (with a broken leg)] [Out of breath] Hey….guys. I finally made it!

Maul: [Kicks EB off.]

Eighth Brother: Damnit! Not again!

[Moment of silence]

[Yoda appears]

Yoda: Succeed, did you?

[Everyone glares at him.]

Ezra: Screw you man.

Yoda: [Chuckles]

**********************

I have been working on this ever since the weekend after the S2 finale aired. And I’m sorry if this isn’t that funny. It’s kinda hard for me to be funny on command, but, I honestly think that I did my best.

The plot of “Ten” is all sketched out. Now it’s time for the other

Most Important Thing In Any Story™

Characters.

LIE. GHOST. WANT. NEED.

You may have noticed in my previous post a little a little note in the top right corner of the first page of my 4 Point Story Structure Worksheet.

Even back here, I was already starting to think about the title character’s personal journey. In case it’s not obvious, Ten is young Sportacus, yo. This was just one of a few ideas I had while working out the plot, and I eventually chose a different arc, but anyway.

Here’s the real TOFU of it:

LIE

GHOST

WANT

NEED

Thanks to this being a fanfic, I already have a good sense of WHO my characters are at the start of the story and who they will become by the end. Now I gotta figure out what makes them CHANGE, and that’s what LIE. GHOST. WANT. NEED. is all about.

Once again, it’s time to…

MAKE STUFF UP.

There are lots of directions that characters can go to get them from the start to the end. Think about The Legend of Zelda. Link always goes from Relatively-unknown-dude-with-a-sock-cap to THE HERO OF TIME, but in each retelling, he does it in a different way and for different reasons. What I have to do now is explore a few different ways to get my character from start to finish. I work on Character Arcs for two or three weeks depending on HOW MANY characters need arcs.

Let’s look at the ANTAGONIST’S CHARACTER ARC.

I believe that the antagonist’s character arc is just as important as the protagonist’s. The only difference it that where the hero will succeed in conquering their Lie.Ghost.Want.Need., the antagonist will FAIL. Here’s the work I did for Mr. Kicker, the primary baddie in Ten:

I poked around with three arcs to see what would happen and how I felt about those changes. I have question marks as I put down ideas I can look at later and go “Hmmmmmm….” In the end, I decided on a hybrid of Arc 1 and Arc 3.

Why???

Lie: Stayed the same.

Ghost: The Ghost in Arc 3 is more tangible. Mr. Kicker will have mental and physical scars from this and that’s better than a vague sense of abuse.

Want: While desiring freedom is a HUGE motivator, now Mr. Kicker’s desire brings him closer to Ten: the crystal.

Need: Unchanged because I think it’s so darn good. If Mr. Kicker would just stop being an ass and befriend the children, Ten might share the crystal freely and they could ALL escape.

 Now, I have character arc sketches for “Ten.”

This is a great time to look back at my 4 Point Story Structure worksheet and try to fill in a few blanks. Where can I advance the conflict between Ten and Mr. Kicker? How will I demonstrate who they are at the start of the story, in the middle (mid transformation), and at the end?

Look forward to next time: WORLD BUILDING!

Jumping in to add the Suicide Prevention bits from Robin #156 (1993).

“Ten,” the story of a dozen children kidnapped by elves and forced to mine a dead dragon’s hoard.

NOW WHAT?

Four Part Story Structure

I love compelling plots, so this is where I start. Some people start with characters, but since I have a pretty good idea of who they are (yay for fanfic!) I bust out a 4PSS worksheet. My earliest one for “Ten” looks like this. Don’t worry about reading it and spoiling too much of the story. A lot of things have changed since I wrote this one and I’m not showing 80% of the story, anyway.

The most important parts of the 4PSS worksheet are… ● First Plot Point (Something irreversible happens) ● Midpoint (Symbolic death) ● Second Plot Point (Somethign irreversible happens again) ● Resolution (That’s right, NOT THE CLIMAX)

In my head, I already have a few scenes in mind, so I look at where they might fit. I know that I want Ten to find the crystal that warns him of danger and I know what the final scene is going to look like, so I write those down first. But that’s about all I know. Now it’s time to…

MAKE STUFF UP.

Getting down ideas, even mediocre ones, help me think up more INTERESTING SCENES, build the world, and see the characters more clearly. I work on this for about 1-2 weeks. I move things around, GET RID OF weak scenes and try other ones. I try out character-driven events and plot-driven events to see what makes me go, “Ooooo!” Bonus points if the idea makes me go, “Ooooo! That would SUCK!” I think you all just learned a lot about me.

From this, I make a new worksheet. The one I have now looks like this:

Different, isn’t it? Not only did plot points shift, but there’s a lot more character in there. But there’s also LESS CONTENT. That’s because the content is HIGHER QUALITY. By the way, that “Killer Hook Event” isn’t usually plot related, so it’s fine to not worry about it or even write it last.

Let’s look at the FIRST PLOT POINT really quickly.

Version 1 ● First Plot Point - Ten keeps the crystal. Will Mr. Kicker find it???

 Version 2 ● First Plot Point - Ten promises to make Quota. Will he be able to do it???

Version 2 is an improvement because now the PRESSURE is on Ten. In Version 1, all of the action was on Mr. Kicker to find the crystal, and that’s not very interesting for a Plot Point. Better to make it an underlying tension than a main one.

Now, I have a sketch of my plot for “Ten.”

This is enough for me to move forward with because I know that as I work on character and world building, I’m going to think of more stuff and it’ll be easier to fill in these blank spaces.

Anyway, she follows it up with, “My husband and I just recently won our custody battle with our foster daughter and she means the world to us. She’s a beautiful African American girl and her hair looks a lot like yours. But I’m afraid because I don’t know what to do with her hair. It’s a lot different from mines and our other children and we are at a total loss. I’ve tried looking up the YouTube videos and my husband went to the braiding shops so they can teach him how to properly braid her hair, but he’s still pretty new and it will be a while before he gets used to it. Do you have any tips you can give me? If you don’t have the time, it’s okay, really! I just needed a little advice because I want her to look beautiful.”

Y’all. swear I almost started crying on aisle 6. So for the last 30 minutes, I spent my time talking to her and what products to use and how to properly detangle and comb her hair with the proper tools and what not to do with natural hair. And I showed her a bunch of easier to follow natural hair tutorials on YouTube and saved them for her. (I also had to create a YouTube account for her so she could save it for later.) but omfg, she was so sweet, and I could tell that she listened to every single thing I had to say and she took little notes on her little notepad.

And what really filled my heart was the fact that her husband actually taking classes from African braiding shops. And she showed me a picture of him wearing a little sweater vest and loafers in a little shop surrounded by beautiful black women showing him how to braid black hair and even the lady he’s braiding on is guiding his hands. And omfg. Bless these old white people and their black daughter who I know have new loving parents because they are willing to step out of their comfort zone just to make her feel and look beautiful.