idk spooky stuff

literally the only good het ships are the ones where the guy is absolutely dedicated to the woman and adores and respects her and knows she’s way cooler than he is and that’s why he loves her. and also she tops him regularly

helpful grammar tip! farther is for physical distance, further is for metaphorical distance, and father is for emotional distance!

do you ever see a really pretty girl and the gay just hits you

iM LAUGHING LIKE A MANIAC MY RAT JUST WENT INSIDE MY BROTHER’S TOY CAR AND SAT IN THE FRONT SEAT

AM I SUPPOSE TO LAUGH AT THE RAT OR THE DOG

whole foods employee catches me stealing valuable artichoke water and tries to apprehend me but i quickly jump through one of his gauges and escape

i see this post maybe once or twice in a year and every time. every goddamn time it sidelines me with those last 8 words and i lose my shit