Besides the obvious like having financial security, being able to support your community and take care of friends and family, the whole "money doesn't bring happiness" bullshit is still bullshit because even if we only look at it from "buying frivolous trinkets" point of view, there's so many fun things I'd get myself commissioned just for shits and giggles.
For one, I'd get my dental layout scanned and then use the 3d model of my teeth to commission a giant pair of pincers where the cutters are replaced with a life-sized metal recreation of my teeth. I would use these to press bite marks on all sorts of things that a human being physically could not bite into, and emotionally would not want to.
For no other reason than to fuck with people. Just so they can see a very obviously human bite mark on something and wonder how the fuck did someone bite a goddamn brick wall, and why would anybody do that.
I do feel like 'money can't buy happiness' has a good point somewhere, but it's such a hamfisted way of making it that it's just total crap. Like... okay: if you have a fundamentally joyless outlook on life and can't meaningfully connect to the people and world around you money won't fix it, and rich people can still be unhappy, but that isn't what the damn saying said.
Also, I remember there was a Monk episode where they did that tooth thing with a dog and that was the murder weapon.
























