Hi!! editing this to make it more digestible cuz I've had enough time to think it through
Current fixation (will be updated): Wind Breaker
my ao3
a-spec so a bunch of ships are very a-spec (either asexual, aromantic or aroace) to me (biggest examples include Sherliam, Hualian, Wenrenjiang, Wrightworth, Akeshu, Saikechi and a lot more but mainly Sherliam)
I'm in so many fandoms omfg, like 20+, almost all of them not live-action tho (all except for House MD I think...), biggest ones include SVSSS, Moriarty the Patriot, Genshin Impact, Persona 5, a whoooole bunch of danmei I read, Death Note and Saiki K (have written fics for the cursive ones, published for bold)
agenda to bring the svsss fandom spirit into other fandoms! I love textposts!!
I'm a sucker for good characterization, my biggest pet peeve is bad characterization and I love discussions abt characterization (won't harrass random ppl tho obv)
I love character studies
I ship all kinds of ships, no matter what genders or popularity, poly ships too (actually invented a polyship for genshin and writing a longfic for it...)
my brain hates me so fic updates/new fics are very very inconsistent... I'm working on it tho!!
Below the cut is a little deep dive into some fics I wrote that I reallyreally love a lot!! If you only wanna read till here, have a wonderful day or night or whatever it is for you rn!!
I'm proudest of my longfic "The Sun, Moon, Stars and Their Sea" for genshin, because it's the longest thing I've ever written. It's also basically the only fic for the ship, the ship being FreXingMingYun (Freminet, Xingqiu, Gaming, Chongyun, because I adore Freminet and I couldn't decide who I liked him best with).
The other fic I'm super proud of is "The Two Detectives on the Train" for Moriarty the Patriot, because it's the best I've written in terms of writing style and I love canon compliant character studies.
My top fic on Ao3 is neither of them, tho, that one would be "Why is it always that blue box??" which is an angsty, system reveal oneshot with a happy ending, which was definitely one of my ambitious works too and I do also love it a lot.
If you're at all interested and have the time, I'd be actually really happy if you checked them out!
So yeah, if you somehow made it till the end, thank you so much! Have a wonderful day or night or whatever it is for you rn!!
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like how every single autistic person seems to have some version of what I call the impermeable membrane which is like this sense of a veil or film or sheet of glass between you and the world. Like you can describe it to someone and they’ll be like oh yeah my impermeable membrane/sheet of glass. like people will talk about how autistics talk and move but I think a lot of autistic people have a shared visual language as well. or how autistic people have different relationships to gender the way queer people do. That gender is performed which takes agency and skill and creative choice. Even the concept that a lot of autistic people have interests that don’t match their aesthetic or aren’t limited to one subculture creates a unique type of cultural dissonance that would be a notable feature of any other artistic culture or movement. Like autism not just being something that acts upon you (as it’s described by everyone else) but something that’s expressed through you with agency and skill
I think whatever punishment we can assign suo is loads better than what he can assign himself. Which is why he's not getting a punishment at all. Like, wouldn't it be worse if they weren't mad at him at the end but just happy he's back? Isn't his mental torture prison worse??
a study on punishments in wind breaker:
Choji and Togame:
Choji tries to take accountability by leaving Shishitoren, and both of them apologize.
Sakura is the one who assigns their punishment and he tells Togame to change and become cool and not lame. Their punishment, really, is to fix the mess they created in Shishitoren.
Nagato:
Nagato was also coming at things from a place of accountability. And shame too.
He gets kind of a brutal talk from Sakura. if I was Nagato I would have just started crying right there lol
To his confusion, he gets a hug and good food.
Before getting Tsuchiya's feeble punch and being welcomed home. Quite the extensive punishment. I would say the main he gets for his troubles is to be understood.
Sakura:
Sakura was apologizing for existing, so his punishment is for his superfluous apology.
He gets a good kicking. I'm gonna stop myself from taking screenshots cause I could screenshot the entire arc I love it so much. And after that they go eat together.
What Sakura really gets from sharing his fear is to become closer to his friends. He is accepted and understood and gets to understand everyone better too.
Suzuri:
This is the first case where they're not immediately apologetic. He still has this real problem and no solution for it.
And then he's offered "salvation" and understanding, but not forgiveness yet.
Suzuri goes on his accountability apology tour (gravel, kanji, shizuka and endo) and gets a chance and people's trust for it. They share food and games.
Shizuka:
Shizuka is sorry for disregarding everyone's feelings.
She gets a hug and a warning she will not get away with this next time. We can come up with the punishments ourselves.
Endo and Chika:
There's like, zero accountability or remorse going on here lol punishment is making a friend??
Natsuki:
Natsuki causes a bit of trouble and apologizes for it.
What she gets is hope, understanding and a family.
Momijikawa:
He is interesting cause he doesn't necessarily apologizes to Sakura, but their first fight came from the assumptions he made about Sakura. Here he is asking his name and trying to understand who he really is.
His embrace and gratitude over Sakura, seeing him for who he really is and calling him by his name is the apology.
What he gets is also what he gives: companionship.
Conclusion:
I think as the story went on, the punishments got less physical (outside of fights. this is a fighting manga. fights will never go away).
So for Suo, I want and Need him and Nirei to fight again. Before their fight I wanted Sakura to fight Suo more, and I still want them to fight, but what I need most is a second fight with Nirei because of how the first fight went. I need a proper, non anticlimactic fight.
Outside of fighting, we don't really know what's going on with Suo, but I think he will be understood, specially by Sakura.
Other possible punishments based on previous punishments: Anzai kicking Suo, Nirei flicking his forehead, Hugs, Eating warm food together, Accountability, being Welcomed Home, Family, Companionship.
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This siphonophore, Erenna richardi, can be identified by the massive clusters of tentilla (the side branches of the tentacle) at the end of the tail (siphosome). In Monterey Bay, this species has been observed at average depths of about 1,100 meters (3,600 feet). These siphonophores are armed with a battery of powerful stinging tentacles, and researchers have seen them ensnaring fish just above the seafloor.
Historically, gelatinous animals have been challenging to study. Their delicate nature makes them difficult to collect, especially from the ocean’s depths. By using deep-diving robots—remotely operated vehicles, or ROVs—MBARI and our collaborators are revealing the dazzling diversity of delicate drifters that lies beneath the surface.
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I think, on one hand, Suo is so self-aware of his issues, what caused them, of symptoms regarding his issues and what gives rise to them, like he knows himself and he understands a lot about the human psyche, almost inherently, because he pays so much attention and self-reflects a lot. like I think he knows he's hyperindependent, has problems with being known, cared for and loved, puts others first too much for it to be called healthy selflessness and has a tendency to dissociate from stress.
on the other hand, however, I think he has fundamental misconceptions that significantly lessen his self-awareness and are very unhealthy, that are probably deeply tied to his upbringing so he just doesn't know anything else. I don't think he views his constant discipline (that is far more excessive than we've seen of any other RC member so far, and even if, still far too excessive for a 15yo) as anything negative, rather as something that he still isn't performing well enough. I think he does view certain emotions as Bad. he's the type who doesn't think he did "his best" until he is physically and emotionally depleted and he always tries to do his best. he doesn't think he himself is genuinely lovable. he doesn't view himself as someone important for whom his friends would break into a strange city for answers.
like, I think he knows he has issues, and maybe there's a part of him that also recognizes the other things as issues, but largely, imo, he has fundamental misconceptions that he hasn't unpacked bc he doesn't think he deserves/needs to fix his own stuff, because It's All Going Just Fine (which is, in of itself, a misconception)
we SHOULD have more shipping content with arospec and acespec characters actually because almost none of the shit we have now is actually that, its writing them as allo and then saying "whaaaat nooooo they can be in relationships tooooo" why dont you try writing the aro character in a romantic partnership as actually being aromantic but partnering that is way more fucking interesting
I will asexual-ify any character I want, I will asexualize characters in ways you've never seen before. I Do Not Care. Your fav is a virgin now. They are unfuckable
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whoops! non-binary-fies your wbk charas, part three
Umemiya - pangender - all
collects pronouns like pokemon, is super excited whenever someone uses a new set
likes to make ppl guess bers pronouns when first meeting ber and makes a big fuss abt telling everyone each that they're correct
makes an effort to use all the pronouns of any given person as soon as they know bc they know how comfortable it is
Tsubaki was the one to make xer realize that xe isn't cis, that's why xe thinks representation matters a lot
tries to build up a pronoun combo with ppl who use a lot of different pronoun sets (tries to use a different pronoun each time)
has always felt super connected to every gender, like whenever someone described their gender ve just nodded like "yeah that makes total sense!"
honestly debates transphobes until someone cuts her off
Kotoha - gendervoid - she/they/he
never felt connected to gender but it took them a while to realize bc of society
is fine with fem gender expression but does get very pissed off when someone only uses fem terms to refer to him
does get height dysphoria
generally doesn't mind if ppl just pick one pronoun set and go with that, just specifically gendered terms annoy her
wears a pride pin and has some small flags in their cafe to let new ppl know it's safe with them
Tsubaki - non-binary - she/he/they with no particular preference
exactly like canon, just in non-binary and with more pronoun options, never change king
Mizuki - deminonbinary - it/xe
generally, it doesn't feel very connected to gender but is partially non-binary
likes presenting androgynously -> ultimate transition goal is gender obscurity
noticed the disconnect between xem and society's idea of gender for most xyr life but didn't know how to put that into words until Umemiya
dislikes how xyr face looks without glasses
Momose - agender - it/its
gender -> unknowable entity/gremlin
feels very euphoric abt its height
it loves wearing the hood, barely goes without it, for euphoria reasons asw
has always known it didn't belong to any gender and has discovered its pronouns pretty soon too but the ppl around it had not been very accepting until Furin
a lot of its early graffiti would consist of spraying "it" everywhere, it did branch out once it found acceptance in Umemiya and Furin tho
