WAIT I read you tags on that one post again about role reversal Shen Yuan and Elyse meeting and it would be such a disaster I can’t stop laughing about it. The two biggest overpowered identity crises who think everyone hates them walk into the abyss and the ultimate victim is the old man that lives in Shen Yuan’s head
Elyse is so sus of the old man living in their new buddy’s head. Why is an old man in your head Shen Yuan? That’s creepy. Get him out. Now. Or let Elyse figure out how to
He truly will never know peace
But also Shizun Binghe having to deal with everything and then his beloved favorite disciple coming back out with an emotional support demigod who is willing to throw hands with anyone for his a-yuan
Djdjjdjdjsjshhe
PLEASE imagining having to explain the Meng Mo situation to anyone is insane like
Shen Yuan: Yeah the old man in my head has been there since I was 14 :/ I called a different demon a bitch in front of all of my people and her people so she put him there and he’s too weak to leave without turning to mind dust :/ yeah. Also if I’m not mad or horny enough I might explode and he’s trying not to have that happen according to him since he can’t like leave.
Elyse: What the actual fuck are you saying with your mouth right now
Sylus: No. No I followed that actually. Is that the real Meng Mo in your head? I thought he was dead
Shen Yuan: Technically he is yes.
Elyse: Well. Get. Him. Out.
Meng Mo is getting body slammed out of Shen Yuan by one (1) pissed off demigod I fear. If weird mind fuckery is truly needed to keep Shen Yuan from blowing up Elyse has their siren song and they trust that more than the weird old man living in their buddies head
Also Sylus acting as a sort of demon world encyclopedia for the two my love. He’s here to flirt with the pretty demigod and do literally whatever they want. If that includes informing them on demon knowledge they lack he’s totally fine with that
Also Elyse is so aware of Shen Yuan’s crush on his Shizun and is so down to play matchmaker. In fact they have many plans because they know Shen Yuan won’t do shit himself
(Shen Yuan would say the exact same thing about Elyse with all of their love interests except he’s way more critical of anyone interested in them than they are of Binghe being interested in him)
But like also also Binghe letting Elyse stay on the peak because Shen Yuan wants them there and eventually having to introduce them to everyone else only for dread to slowly build in his stomach as he sees the way his sect siblings are looking at them
With the number of years that have passed at that point (at least four depending on how deep they are in the Abyss) Shen Yuan would both be strong enough to kick Meng Mo out on his own if he really wanted to and has mostly found equilibrium between his human and demon sides. He just keeps Meng Mo around for someone to bitch at/comfort/honor/some kind of weird fucked up squatters rights in his own head because that old man does not fucking pay rent to live there. Also as much as he threatens to kill them both it hasn’t occurred to him since he agreed to let Meng Mo stay in the first place to… just fucking evict him.
Meng Mo also might have gained enough power to have enough of a soul to bottle himself again for a while to start the whole process over later. Like he might be fine. He hasn’t mentioned this to Shen Yuan or moved. But he genuinely could be fine.
The siren song however could be useful for Evil Sword purposes.
Sylus would find it funny how much and how little Shen Yuan knows I think. Lik the most esoteric of demonic knowledge? Shen Yuan knows it. What would be the equivalent of demon preschool? Shen Yuan has no idea. This boy apologized for growling at Sylus. Apologized. Yes he was raised by humans but??? He had Meng Fucking Mo in his head. Did the old man teach him no demonic culture in the years he was there?
How many Shizun’s would Shen Yuan get deep before Elyse caught on? Three? Four? One if he had a particularly heartbroken and besotted look on his face? Either way they are determined to get him out and back with Luo Binghe to Solve The Confusion. Particularly when they get out of Shen Yuan that Luo Binghe didn’t actually push him and Shen Yuan jumped.
(Shen Yuan is fine with Sylus because Sylus is at least useful. I mean he helped them in the abyss and after with the whole opm mess which was… a lot. But once the dust has settled he starts to realize that Elyse attracts freaks. Absolute freaks. What the fuck Elyse.)
Binghe is already Not Close with most of his sect siblings but with A-Yuan’s issues with men fighting with his demonic possessive instinct claiming Elyse as His (platonic) in the same was as he has claimed Yingying and a bunch of people he doesn’t like sniffing around them? Bingzun is going to be damn near killing people about it I fear.
Shen Yuan has claimed Elyse had His (platonic) but like Sylus had been placed firmly as Elyse’s in his head
Like, the others want Elyse to be Theirs which is a big no no, but Sylus is Elyse’s which is fine
Also Sylus taking over as the Demon Culture Teacher both bc he’s old enough to do it but also because he’s prideful enough that he just wants to show up Meng Mo
(Sylus, the richest demon ever, hounding Meng Mo about owing him money my beloved. Even better if it’s like, five dollars)
Elyse, who is a dating sim connoisseur, hears one particularly said Shizun and clocks that shit immediately. They then decide they must Clear The Confusion so they can both realize and act upon the proper solution to the matter
(There was a short while where they were contemplating if they had to murder Shen Yuan’s Shizun but then the “Shen yuan jumped” reveal happened and the scrapped the idea entirely)
Meanwhile Binghe ends up participating in many “friendly spars” with his fellow peak lords. For reasons.
That truly is the crux of it.
Sylus is, in Shen Yuan’s mind, Elyse’s gold encrusted pet lizard that sometimes drops lore. Sylus is also smart and old enough to clock a traumatized heavenly demon hybrid who imprinted on someone and not mess with that. It’s not romantic. Elyse is fine with it. He sees no reason to interfere. In fact, it’s safer for both of them.
(And demons aren’t sentimental creatures but Sylus has never considered himself a good demon and anything important to Elyse is important to him. If he ever gets his hands on whoever hurt Shen Yuan so badly they will more than regret it. More so when he sees the slave mark on the boys back and the pieces start falling into place.)
Everyone else is more intense to say the least and with Shen Yuan’s brand of issues that doesn’t go well.
Sylus teaching Shen Yuan is doubly funny becuase he would also piss off Shen Yuan like Meng Mo but in a totally different way. Man is too slick. It would drive Shen Yuan crazy. Sylus thinks it’s so funny. Top tier rage baiter. But also Shen Yuan is definitely not the only demon he’s raised taught. Sometimes Shen Yuan will snap his fangs at him and he will get a flash of the twins that is so charming it’s like he’s back in time. It’s nostalgic. Sylus is very fond of it actually. Shen Yuan definitely gets a nickname that he hates (anything but A-Yuan)
(It’s like two spirit stones. Sylus refuses to let even death get in the way of collecting. Again. Rage baiter.)
Getting the actual story out of Shen yuan is like pulling teeth. It takes five near death scenarios two truth poisons and one near fatal stabbing/blood mite healing incident to get the whole thing out. Even then Shen Yuan doesn’t realize he has a crush. Sylus and Elyse realize he does but Shen Yuan does not.
(Elyse having a whole murder plan only to scrap it when they realize no wait he’s just a disaster is so funny. False alarm. He’s just stupid. Got it. Recalibrating. The teacher gets to live and in fact gets to rail that twink.)
Binghe has to think about A-Yuan’s already fragile mental health okay. And when Caleb can’t wean his mind around a man grabbing for Elyse being bad in Shen Yuan’s mind Binghe will remind him. Violently. Repeatedly. With a sword.
Funniest part about the murder plan is that Elyse will just casually admit it. To Binghe’s face. Like, “yeah before I got the full story out of Shen Yuan I was totally planning to kill you to keep him safe :/ but then I realized you’re both just disasters so it was matchmaking instead” and Binghe is honestly just nodding along like “yes. That is completely reasonable and I am glad a-yuan had someone who would do that for him”
Which is honestly just the crux of the relationship there
Sylus as Elyse’s pet lizard in Shen Yuan’s mind is so real though. He is more than happy to be their pet and he is more than pleased that Shen Yuan feels comfortable enough in his presence
Meanwhile Shen Yuan would very much like Wlyse to stop wandering off with strange men. They literally never did that before. Why are they doing it now????
(The answer is it’s the Lads boys. Those are their blorbos :((( and they’re asking for help :((( why does it matter that they’re carrying a sack? Maybe they need it for something)
That does mean Maycie has the best luck getting close to Elyse outside Sylus. Which she is more than willing to take advantage of
Binghe is nodding along. More people should try to kill him to protect A-Yuan actually. Well perhaps not more, his A-Yuan has always been selective when it comes to making friends. Elyse is all considered probably his third. Maybe his second. It is hard to tell where Ming Fan falls on the list at times the two of them being how they are.
You know Sylus being seen as Safe by Shen Yuan would drive more than a few of the other LI’s insane. Objectively Shen Yuan has known some of them longer than Sylus. They watched him grow up basically some of them might know some of his… oddities. (Zayne might be the closest to winning safe status next of the men because he would notice Shen Yuan’s Issues and act accordingly like Mu Qingfang does in the fic and he’s also… less likely to grab a sack…)
Shen Yuan acting like if Luo Binghe walked up to him with a sack and told him to get in like he wouldn’t already have one leg in before the command was already finished is so funny. Like man why are you throwing stones in this glass house? You moved in to his home. Because he said so. At fourteen like???? Buddy.
Maycie however does not even register as a problem to Shen Yuan. She is totally fine. She can be as much as a freak as she wants. She will be abusing this.
Ahjdjdjdjdjdh WAIT
If Elyse is following Shen Yuan around that means that and Sylus are just there for Qiu Hiatang and Shen Yuan casually admitting to a mass murder he doesn’t remember committing and I know that’s going to raise Elyse’s blood pressure.
Shen Yuan's ranking of the polycule
Sylus, Maycie
Zayne
Xavier, Rafayel
Caleb
Ohh but Elyse is shaking Shen Yuan by the shoulders like "why would you admit to that???? You never tell the cops anything" like, they have zero issue with mass murder. If Shen Yuan wants to kill a bunch of people, he can. They are more than willing to do some mind fuckery of their own to ensure he gets away with it. But admitting to it makes their job so much harder
Now they have to figure out how to get him out of this mess which they are no where near smart enough, Sylus helppppp
Shen Yuan hates Caleb. Cannot fucking stand his ass. Knowing Caleb’s everything it is probably on some level mutual like that man will beef with a twenty something who is The Most traumatized.
Caleb has probably gotten stabbed with the blood knives more than once both on purpose and as a trauma response because Man™️ reaching for Elyse and Shen Yuan does not care for that shit at all.
Conversely Sylus has a scar where Shen Yuan bit him that he proudly shows off as “Xiao Yuan’s gift” because he thinks it’s funny how the nickname makes Yue Qingyuan’s eyebrow twitch. Also it makes the rest of the polycule mad to have the reminder that even though Sylus is A Man and just as big as the rest of them Shen Yuan doesn’t hate him
Snjdjsjdjd
Sylus is helping. He is helping by preparing to get them all the fuck out the moment Elyse clicks onto the fact that Qiu Hiatang called Shen Yuan her husband and Elyse does the math on that because it very much does not add up in a way they will like.
Also important to note. Like half the peak lords are there. They are all watching this happen their into to Elyse could very well be “who cares if you actually killed all those people Shen aYuan don’t fucking SAY IT!!!” And I think the LADS crew (and Binghe) would appreciate that tbh
Also Xin Mo isn’t as bad with Elyse and Sylus around most likely but I can’t stop laughing at the idea at these two like bullying Shen Yuan into self car in the flavor of remembering to do is hair and wear shoes. Xiao Yuan please. Shoes. I know you’re so mentally ill and the sword is so evil but shoes are very important
Caleb absolutely has beef back at Shen Yuan. The only things he cares about are his meimei and the person he and his meimei are going to marry. Shen Yuan is an obstacle in that quest but also someone who has claimed his future bride as His and that’s Not Allowed. He does not care if it platonic or not
Sylus has bite scars from both Shen Yuan and Elyse and he is so very proud of them both. He shows them off constantly. Also Sylus and Yue Qingyuan beefing is hilarious
And Elyse would say they don’t care about the murder with their full chest. They don’t give a shit. These people can think whatever the fuck they want about them. They have their priorities and that getting Shen Yuan’s out of here
This does have the consequence of leaving several people in love with them because they are freaks that find Elyse’s freak attractive
Also yes Qiu Hiatang calling Shen Yuan her husband and Elyse having to take a second to do the math but also Elyse and Shen Yuan being Like That (extremely traumatized and having Claimed each other) plus Elyse being kinda girl shaped leads to possible assumptions being made which also have their own comedy
But Elyse is going to claw that girl’s face off
But also also Elyse using their siren song to sing Shen Yuan to sleep. Siren song lullabies. Elyse helping do his hair and enforcing self care. They’re such cuties
Jdjdjdjd with the Blood Mites Shen Yuan can in fact make Caleb sit down and shut up whenever the fuck he wants due to his panic blood knifing that he definitely pretends were done on purpose. He mostly uses this to give Caleb period cramp like symptoms and make him physically incapable of grabbing Elyse whenever Shen Yuan is around.
Both of them pretend this isn’t happening. It is a Cold War. They refuse to mention it. Mentioning it gives the other power and they refuse to let that happen.
Sylus also has bite marks from the twins if they are around in this. He’s collecting them. His family. He’s gunning for Maycie next. Her teeth are flat but he can make it work.
Elyse, with their full chest: Murder is okay!
Like half of Cang Qiong: Hot. I mean based. I mean
Shen Yuan: No but fr I killed all those people. Probably. I don’t remember like on purpose because I could remember if I wanted to at any point but it was Me. Which means nothing to anyone but you and Sylus but is important to me that you know that
Elyse: I need you to stop talking buddy.
It never crossed my mind how Elyse and Shen Yuan looked to other people who aren’t used to their brand of traumatized and that makes this way funnier actually. Like to the uneducated this is messy harem drama but it is actually way way worse and the two who are clinging to each other are in fact not even remotely interested in the other romantically or sexually. They are just like that. Elyse probably drank Shen Yuan’s blood for fun or like to help him practice/see if they could out bloodbend his blood mites. Platonically.
Sylus could explain the dynamics of a demonic imprinting like what’s going on between the two of them for the humans present. He won’t but he could. He would at least make the fact he could known
(Luo Binghe doesn’t need it explained. Shen Yuan is basically the same way with Yingying. Just more intense now that the cradle seal has been broken. Everyone else though is a bit lost.)
Hahdjdjfj
On nights when Shen Yuan’s mind is clearer he specifically crafts kinder dreams for Elyse so they don’t fall into Demigod Dreams. It’s not often. And increasingly less so, but those moments of clarity and care are cherished.
The twins are absolutely around. They are Sylus’ beloved sons/henchmen/minions and they have decided Shen Yuan is like, kinda their brother and Elyse is obviously their other parent/captain. They’re probably busy harassing Shang Qinghua for funsies
The twins also get little mini bite marks from the three bc it’s a Thing now. The only reason Shen Yuan and Elyse don’t have them is because the two are a bit too hardy for the bites to properly scar
Elyse, if they thought it would be helpful, would run with the “the two are in a relationship” angle. But Shen Yuan has a teacher to bang and it’s not helpful. So they ignore it. They do not think to deny it though. They’re busy. The people who need to know will figure it out themselves
But also Elyse and Shen Yuan have absolutely both drank each other’s blood. Just to see what would happen. It was For Science or whatever. Neither think it’s at all weird
(Elyse can in fact bloodbend the blood mites and it turns out demigod blood is like, demon steroids. Which they will be keeping in their back pocket if needed)
Jdjdjdhhhd
I just realized Shen Yuan went from refusing to call the Old Man who won’t pay rent while squatting in his head his teacher to Sylus who skipped even the attempt at being called teacher and went straight for adoption. That’s his kind of son now. He probably knows Tianlang-Jun. he probably thinks this is hilarious actually.
Shen Yuan is actually very fond of the Twins. They are Shidi™️ in his mind (both very well could be older than him he is like barely twenty or like tops early thirties if you count his first life. Older if you add both of his lives together which he likes to but he is wrong he did not live the whole second life. He transmigrated at like eleven.) but more than that they are safe. Shen Yuan would kill for them. He has. He is terrifying. The twins and Elyse set off his protective instinct in such a big way.
Yinging is fuming. She wants a bite scar. Ming Fan thinks she’s fucking insane.
Many people go insane about that lack of denial actually. That lack of denial causes almost as many problems as the whole marriage accusation in the first place. Binghe is fucking losing it for all of ten seconds before he sees how Sylus is looking at Elyse and he. Puts 2 and 2 together.
He and perhaps Zayne are unfortunately the only two with working brains whenever Elyse is present however so there is still drama.
Poor Binzun and Zayne hearing the things these two tested “For Science!!” That Sylus just let happen because demon sense of danger is very different than Humans is so funny to consider. Of course he let them drink each others blood. It wasn’t like they would hurt each other on purpose. If it was on accident there are few things a Heavenly demon can’t heal from and Shen Yuan already had a very good understanding of human anatomy. There was minimal risk.
SNFNNSNDNDB
Hama and Mephisto!!!
Mephy getting bullied by the grandmother bird!! He was not properly looking after her hatchling! He will be hearing about it. She is. The side of perhaps one fourth of him.
Sylus is a huge believer in Finders Keepers. He’s a greedy guy! If Tianlang-Jun didn’t want his son to get adopted he shouldn’t have let the kid wander around unattended
The only one Shen Yuan is actually older than is Elyse. And that’s a maybe. Elyse gets treated as younger anyways because they will always be relegated to Baby status by older brothers
Yingying wants a bite scar from Shen Yuan and later Elyse, who is always so down to teach batshit crazy weapons skills that they swear are So Normal. She wants to be part of whatever fuckery is going on there so bad she’ll tolerate scars from Sylus and the twins too
(Sylus thinks she’s just adorable in a feral sort of way. The twin also think she’s hilarious)
There are so many rumors regarding what going on with these two freaks. The general conclusion is that there is some weird fuck ass polycule going on there. And there technically is! Shen Yuan is just not part of it
Zayne and Binghe are both smart enough to both put 2 and 2 together and also ask for clarification. Because Elyse and Shen Yuan will give it
Elyse and Shen Yuan really are throwing Demigod Nonsense and Heavenly Demon Nonsense at each other to see what happens and Sylus is in the background watching calmly. The twins are making bets. Later on Zayne and Binghe both get to freak the fuck out about it but these two are genuinely so hard to kill it’s insane. They’ll be fine
Hama gets to harass Mephisto. As a treat
This is making me think though. Elyse should get a cursed demon animal companion. As a treat too. Not a bird though. Unless it’s a grounded one. Something else though probably…
The son that Tianlang-Jun doesn’t know he has. Or barely knows he has. Hard to tell with him. He knows some half demon hybrid who looks like him and his ex gave Zhuzhi-Lang the mushroom for his body but he is In Denial about what that means for a minute. Of confused about the details. Or just as unstable as his son after Mountain Time. A bit hard to tell.
Sylus doesn’t care. His son now. Skill issue.
Shen Yuan still tries to do his “I’m so old” routine. He is humored. He is a baby. An infant. He has had his seal broken for like two years. Someone help him. The twins think it’s funny though. Fuck do they care about seniority. They’re a family of like five. Seven if you count the birds. Shen Yuan can choose his rank if he wants to. As a treat.
Yingying and Elyse teaming up to be Shen Yuan’s bodyguards. No one is safe. The twins are backing them up. Ming Fan is actively going gray.
Fnajsjsjs the yes but is so funny here. Like yea. Fuck ass polycule is happening. Not Shen yuan though. Actually he is monogamous and gay. Only he doesn’t know that yet. He has been actively in love with the same man since he was like 12. Absolutely no idea. Doesn’t even know he’s attracted to men. Elyse is working on it.
Sndjdjdhjdjd they would have to ask the other one because Shen Yuan is still too skittish to be around Binghe at the start so imagining Zayne trying to play it so cool while also being like “Shizhi. What???” Is so funny. Man is so confused. There’s a lot to unpack with their everything. At least Zayne is patient with Shen Yuan and would have experience with him from his disciple days and his many many injuries so he is somewhat prepared for how to handle his more delicate mental state.
Look you can’t put two of the strongest people Ont he planet together and not expect them to See What Happens. They wanna know! It’s exciting! Both of them do blood stuff!!! It’s cool!! It also freaks Shen yuan out less about his everything and Elyse can kind of explain better than Meng Mo ever did so it’s a win win
(Sylus also explains better. But as a fellow Modern Kid Elyse can speak to Shen Yuan in a way he gets.)
My first thought was like “what goes I the water ! Turtle!” Which made me laugh. I do like the thought of them having a Very Large companion compared to Shen Yuans Very Small one. Fist sized bird and a rideable mount is very funny
They are the weirdest non nuclear family of maybe five ever. Like Sylus and Elyse are The Parents. But also Elyse and Shen Yuan are kinda siblings? They drank each other’s blood and that close enough. But Sylus is absolutely Shen Yuan’s kinda dad. And the twins are Shen Yuan’s shidi’s. But Elyse is absolutely their parents/boss. It’s a thing
Ning Yingying is so happy when she gets her first bite scar. Shes so proud of it. She immediately goes to show it off to the twins and then the three of them go to terrorize Ming Fan about it. As a treat
Someone brings up the polycule to Shen Yuan and he immediately starts bitching about it and the person who brought it up is like “???? Aren’t you part of that????” And Shen Yuan is like “??? No???? The fuck???” And then he probably goes on to claim that of course he’s not part of it. He’s straight. And there’s nothing straight going on there. Only part of this is true
Elyse firmly believes there is no better teach that Fucking Around and Finding Out. And that goes doubly so when you have someone just as strong as you fucking around with you. The two are having the time of their goddamn lives okay? No one gets to stop them
And Elyse with a fuck off big mount of some kind is soooo good. It’s either a turtle or a crab. Or maybe even both. For fun. Whatever they end up with is cursed and terrifying and actually probably the most chill of the animals somehow. Unless Elyse gets hurt. Which is basically impossible
You know those overly complicated and often contradictory friendship family assignments everyone had in middle school that took an entire recess to explain to one rather glassy eyed teacher complete with flow chart? That’s them. It only makes sense to them. All of them think everyone else is stupid because they can’t follow. It’s literally so simple what’s so hard to understand (all of it.)
Of course it’s from Shen Yuan. He was her Shidi first and while she’s sad he didn’t bite her first she did take his bite first and she is still happy about it. It is right. It is meant. She is his and he is hers.
Ming Fan tries to wipe it away like a mom with a tattoo. And almost cries. Shimei please his poor heart can’t take this. Shidi is already hanging on by a thread most days don’t do this to him too.
Shen Yuan would be so offended. He is a #Ally okay? Are they implying Elyse is a woman? He is only attracted to women! They are not a woman! He is about to become an unskippable cutscene of whoopass.
He was so caught up in affirming Elyse’s gender He completely forgot about Maycie being a hypothetical option. For no reason of course.
(Anyone who has seen him interact with Luo Binghe for more than three seconds is giving him the side eye of all time and wondering who is going to tell him. It’s becoming very clear someone is going to have to tell him.)
Look Shen yuan is just glad this fucking around doesn’t come with a side effect of Brain Damage. This is way better than the old man’s teaching methods. Don’t tell Elyse that. (He told Sylus m which will not make it back to them I’m sure.)
If turtle the. Turtles all the way down jokes. If crab that implies the first time Sylus took them to see demon crabs Elyse left with BEEG CRAB which is very funny.
Xiang Fei will know no peace. He is in the northern palace in the demon realm waiting for Luo Binghe only to get the jump scare of his life in the form of Shen Yuan and entourage. Also Sylus. Who he Does Not Owe Money He Checked
Dnnhdhdhdns WAIT
In my outline Zhuzhi-Lang attempts to kidnap Shen Yuan after he admits to mass murder which might cause some.. problems
Ming Fan actually cries when more bite marks start appearing on Yingying. Having Shen Yuan’s was bad enough but he was one of them. The others? The freaks Shen Yuan brought back? Shimei whyyyyyyy?
The twins are watching the breakdown and cackling
Shen Yuan has his unskippable gender affirming cut scene but like also, if he were to date a man (which he wouldn’t) he would not be in any relationship that contained stupid fuck ass Caleb. He is like, The Worst Option. The best would, of course, be Bingzun. That’s just common sense
(Elyse had been trying okay? They are trying their best but they have their own relationship disaster to deal with as well and Shen Yuan is not making it easy)
Hmmmm. Elyse made friends with a giant demon turtle when they first arrived and goes back to visit but the first time Sylus takes them to meet the demon crabs the find the biggest one and immediately pack bond with it. It’s theirs now. His name is Sebastian
Xiang Fei is very careful about his money when Sylus is involved. He is not getting on the wrong side of all of that. He still knows no peace. The twins, Shen Yuan and Elyse to a slightly lesser extent bat at him like cats with a cat toy
At least he has the protection that comes with being the scariest people’s favorite court jester?
Hxkwhziwkhsie
Zhuzhi-Lang: *tries to kidnap Shen Yuan*
Elyse: *immediately football tackles him in all their 5’1 glory*
Ming Fan had already accepted Shen Yuan was a foregone conclusion. He and Ning Yingying had been Strange about each other since they were fourteen and fifteen (liek he was not to some extent) he knew something like this was going to happen. But more???? More!!??! He can’t handle this. He’s dying. She’s killing him. They’re both killing him. Is that what they want?
The twins are in hysterics. They’ve hit the dirt and are full on cackling. Hama who would normally stop the undignified display is watching Ming Fan’s suffering very smug.
Sncnjdjddbndsbdb
Shen Yuan: Caleb!? CALEB I have better fucking taste than Caleb! Sorry Elyse, your taste in men is pretty fucking terrible
Elyse: opinion, but go off
Shen Yuan: If I were to date a man there are far better options than Caleb. Shizun is right there!
Luo Binghe: *chokes*
Shen Yuan: *proceeds to rant for an hour about how luo Binghe is the perfect man*
Shen Yuan: I’m straight though.
Elyse: Buddy…
Sebastian!!! Shen Yuan laughs a bit too hard at the name until Elyse calls him out on Hana’s name and he shuts up real fast. Both of them can be called out for their nerd behavior now.
Don’t sell Xiang Fei short. He is also their favorite uber driver since they all hate Shen Yuan using Evil Sword if he doesn’t have to (his opinion of have to differs greatly from theirs) to varying extents. This means any time they want to go somewhere he gets one or all of them Appearing to torment him at any time of day. He never knows when it will be. If it’s Shen yuan he can literally appear out of thin air via portal if no one heads him off first which kind fo defeats the purpose but he is committed to the bit if nothing else.
Also he has years of pent up aggression to take out on airplane. As is his right for the amount of protagonist bullshit he had to live through.
Zhuzhi-Lang pulls the sower stunt sees his idiot cousin announce his demon heritage, his guilt in a mass murder, former slave status, and then just fucking Stand There letting his former wife (?) threaten him and decides he has to get him out. This child is going to let himself fucking killed or locked under a mountain and he has been alive for five minutes.
Then the slip of a thing next to him lays him flat for daring to reach for him. Or exist near him as a man.
Unclear really both are equally serious offenses.
Elyse has had to listen to many a “Shizun is objectively the perfect man” rant. They’d pray for him to realize how he sounds one day but they know the gods would never answer their prayers
(Elyse doesn’t go on rants like that. They like their partners a little messy and insane and imperfect. It adds a little zest to life and also no sane person would ever be able to date them)
Xiang Fei actually does way more than most people realize but he considers himself court jester and Uber driver first and foremost
(And ohhhhh. Elyse would blow up that stupid sword with their mind if they could. They are still trying to figure out how. They’ll get there one day they swear)
Zhuzhi-Lang arrives just as Elyse finishes up their math and immediately gets laid tf out. And then stepped on to make sure he stays down while they start yelling at this girl for Several Reason. They’d pray also might start jumping to murder very very soon if steps are not taken to prevent this
Shen Yuan will never realize because Luo Binghe is perfect. He was made to be perfect. He is the protagonist. The world was made for him. He is gentle and kind and ruthless when he needs to be. He is honorable and good and deserved real kindness and never got any and Shen Yuan wished he could have given him that but instead he lied to him for years and no wonder he was transmigrated into the scum villain even if the roles were fucks duo and switched.
(Smash cut to Xiang Fei talking about his feral dumpster fire son and how much he sucks On Purpose but only ever when Shen Yuan is Not Around)
((Elyse is a person of Culture. Shen Yuan is in denial.))
Xiang Fei is the epitome of the “become important at work and it’s ruining my life” meme. Except his definition of important is like jungly bells and rush hour traffic. Also Shen Yuan’s impending mental breakdown that may or may not set off a nuke. Jury’s still out on that one.
(Unfortunately that sword is In Shen Yuan’s Mind And Soul. Like in there in there. It is eating him alive and very much driving him crazy. Faster than it did Binghe because he had one defense built for it and was completely unprepared for the personalized attack it put up for him specifically that was Not In The Novel. As time passes he becomes more and more like a ghost fueled by anxiety and terror.
I imagine no one likes it. But Elyse would HATE it. The siren song becomes very important to counteract sword.)
Shen Yuan does quick math, panics at what he sees, and would whip out Evil Sword about it. He was fun letting himself be arrested or kidnapped but Elyse? They have to get out. If he didn’t Sylus was fully prepared to haul them both out I’m sure. And that’s of Cang Qiong didn’t actively start a war for one (1) disciple and his friend.
Oh don’t imagine Elyse singing more and more as time goes on. Singing their voice hoarse and then chugging down water to sing some more because this isn’t an opponent they can fight and they hate it
Their song was, admittedly, the ability they used least growing up. They always focused on the more destructive, combat focused techniques. That wasn’t to say they didn’t practice with it but well, it’s hard to practice a siren song when no one was there to listen
And they are certainly regretting it now
But that does mean by the time the stupid fuck ass sword has been dealt with their song’s power has grown exponentially. It’s actually kind of terrifying
But also Elyse and Shen Yuan truly are The Same because both of them would absolutely let themself get arrested but freak out the second they realized the other might also get in trouble
I also find the idea of Zhuzhi-Lang getting dragged through the portal, dazed and confused and also possibly slightly horny hilarious. So he can get dragged in too. As a treat
Don’t imagine Shen Yuan getting more and more scared of people he knows are safe. Not Elyse because they are His. But Sylus and the twins. Binghe. Zayne if he can be lured back to Cang Qiong. Xiang Fei.
(I do think at a certain point Sylus and the twins would drink Shen Yuan’s blood to give him a feeling of control. They might not be able to Bite and leave a mark but they can bite and have Shen Yuan know where they are and hav e a bit of insurance that he will never use (probably) (in his right mind anyway) (they’re all unhinged enough this is normal for them))
Once it starts getting really bad I can see Shen Yuan fully taking the sword and bolting. Because the sword knows Elyse is nerfing it so it wants Shen yuan in the wind. How long that will last with Mephisto undoubtably stalking him is debatable.
But!! This will allow gay awakening through dream sequence/dragging Bingzun in and kkissing him only to panic when he realizes he’s real so
Shen Yuam recognizing his cousin only after he’s eaten dirt and is on the ground (he looks different! He’s not all fleshy and weird now! It’s a reasonable excuse! Stop laughing Sylus!) and dragging him by a foot only to throw him as far from Elyse as possible once they’re through. They may be family or whatever but Shen yuan doesn’t need him around Elyse dammit.
The more scared Shen Yuan gets the more Elyse sings but it’s like wrapping a wound that needs stitches in gauze. It’s not a long term solution
But also for all Elyse hates that stupid sword that sword hates Elyse too
(Don’t imagine it trying to twist Shen Yuan’s mind. Trying to get him to cut out their vocal cords. To try and force them to stop singing. Not that it’d ever work. Both because Shen Yuan would never and because Elyse could always grow their vocal cords back)
Shen Yuan is compelled to run instead. Not that it lasts long. But everyone knows what it means. Stop gap measures only work for so long after all
But also
Shen Yuan: Fucking really Elyse? My cousin?
Elyse: Cousin? Wait no. He was trying to kidnap you!
Shen Yuan: Yeah. And now he’s going to try and kidnap (bridenap) you!
They are having two very different conversations
Oh but how the fear Shen Yuan feels would turn to fear of himself because he could so easily hurt the people he cares about. Elyse. Sylus. The twins. Binghe.
Yes he’s terrified for his own safety but half his dreams? Half his dreams it’s his hands wet with blood. Wielding a sword far too big for him. Trading someone limb from limb. Cutting vocal cords to stop the singing that kept him weak.
He is equally afraid of being the monster as he is of being the victim again.
Zhuzhi-Lang is watching this go back and forth wondering when he can jump in only to turn a little bit and see fucking Sylus. Which is less than ideal for him. He isn’t Heavenly Demon level of power but he is old and storming enough that he will be a problem. Particularly with Shen Yuan around as he has no delusions about where his cousins loyalties lie. He can see the bite mark in Sylus’ arm after all. He knows what that means. Not to mention his twins who are never far.
He’s realizing his kidnapping plan backfired on him rather spectacularly. Which is fine. His uncle will not come for him unless he gets bored and if he does he… owes Sylus money. Shit.
Oh Xin Mo. How everyone fucking hates you
No but Xin Mo trying to convince Shen Yuan that Elyse is a threat. That they are manipulating him with their song. They are keeping him weak, vulnerable. But Elyse is His and Shen Yuan knows they’d never do that so a different approach has to be used
Not that any approach would ever truly work. They drank each other’s blood. They are in this together. No evil sword can change that
I love the idea that basically every demon ever owes Sylus (who is just about as old and powerful as you can get without being at least part heavenly demon or a demigod) money with the sole exception of Xiang Fei who keeps his shit on lock so he never gets into a situation where he owes Sylus anything
But also Zhuzhi-Lang truly ended up in one of the only situations he couldn’t escape from huh? He truly is stuck
I suppose he could try his hand at flirting in the mean time? It might piss Shen Yuan off enough to let him go
Xin Mo would try to convince him they are working with Sylus and the twins to Hurt Him but that’s dumb. He knows that’s dumb. Elyse wouldn’t hurt him on purpose and Sylus and am the twins only ever want what Elyse wants. The one time Sylus reached for Shen Yuan when he was out of it and Shen Yuan panicked he didn’t even fight back which goes again everything Shen Yuan knows about demons. Everything is about fighting. To show a weakness like that is… weird. Unheard of. But still Sylus let Shen Yuan sing his fangs in and didn’t fight back.
He could have. They both know it.
Shen Yuan can’t figure out why he didn’t.
And the twins are Shidi. Shidi are safe. They need protected. She Yuan has to protect them. They need him.
And Elyse. Elyse is in his blood. In his bones. In his soul. Deeper than the sword he thinks. Deeper than this body. If they both went back to their original bodies he would be able to find them still. To know them. They would still be His. He would be Theirs.
I mean Tianlang-Jun’s whole thing is that he spends so much money that it doesn’t matter how much he has he is always broke because he cant conceptualize money. He blows it all always. It’s why he needed to be a sugar baby. So he very easily got in debt to Sylus. He doesn’t mind. Sylus is amusing and a friend as mush as either of them have friends. Sylus… also probably knows more about the truth of Shen Yuan’s mother than Tianlang-Jun does or could very easily since Shen Yuan is his son now. He called dibs.
Shen Yuan is going to beat snake ass. He doesn’t care that his cousins snakes are cool. Elyse is His. Back off. He actually growls at him and is mortified about it.
