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Lemony Snicket's Advice on Writing a Nice Thank-You Note
1. Do not start with the thank you.
2. Start with any other sentence. If you first say, “Thank you for the nice sweater,” you can’t imagine what to write next. Say, “It was so wonderful to come home from school to find this nice sweater. Thank you for thinking of me on Arbor Day.”
3. Then you’re done.
I recommend learning how to write a very good thank-you note. A child who can write a nice thank-you note can turn into a cocaine dealer five years later and be remembered as the child who wrote nice thank-you notes.
I’m so emotional about dinosaur stuffed animals,,, there are these creatures, extinct long before any of us were alive, but we found their bones and their eggs and their footprints. And we made drawings and models of what they could’ve looked like. And we made them into stuffed animals so we could hold them. We made them soft so we could love them. I’m sobbing
Yeah, we're the animal so preoccupied with petting other animals we're sort of collectively upset there are animals we never get to pet, so we make proxies to snuggle and tell their ghosts we'd have loved them if they were here.
One Goblin - That's just a goblin. He's probably just getting his groceries or something. Leave him alone, you asshole.
Ten Goblins -- That's a fairly normal amount of goblins. There's generally around ten goblins in any given situations. They're just here for aesthetic, so you know it's a fantasy world. Remember to tip them when you leave.
One Hundred Goblins -- Ok this is too many goblins, but this is a reasonable amount of too many goblins. Like, this is maybe an army of goblins or something? My point is that they're probably here for a good reason. Best not to mess with them, they're likely load-bearing in some way.
One Thousand Goblins -- This is probably a goblin town, in which case this is really more a case of One Human, which is a completely different list only available on goblintube. If not, all these goblins are lost. Return them to the goblin town. The orcs are worried.
One Million Goblins -- A million goblins? I'm not sure I've even seen a million things in my life , and now there's a million goblins? That's, like, all the goblins. Why are you at a convention of all the goblins? Are you a goblin? Actually, no, that would make sense. Yeah, that's probably what's going on here. Sorry you had to find out this way.
One Billion Goblins -- Ok, look, at this point you have clearly been sent to a future time where humanity is extinct and goblins have inherited the earth. I can think of no other explanation for a billion goblins. This sadly means that you're the weirdo, and you have to go be a cryptid now. At least you can find a phone and read the goblin creepypastas about you.
One Trillion Goblins -- How? What is happening? This is more goblins then there are birds, and they'll all in your house? How is your house this big? Wait, forget the goblins, how is your house this big? Are the goblins here to guillotine you? Probably! Move out of your stupid mansion and let the goblins have it, you weird rich bird-hoarding freak.
One Quadrillion Goblins -- One quadrillion? I'm only like 80% sure that's even a real number! Luckily, you won't have to deal with a quadrillion goblins for long, because soon they'll collapse together under their gravity, forming a far more manageable single planet-sized goblin. Picard's not gonna be happy about this one!
More Goblins -- Fuck off, you do not have more then a quadrillion goblins. Why are you lying? Are you worried I won't like you if you don't claim to have an implausible number of goblins? Don't worry. Your worth is not dependent on your goblin numbers. Go back to the actual number of goblins secure in the fact I love you, no matter how few goblins you have <3
This is a common misconception. There are actually never no goblins. If you think there's no goblins, you just haven't seen the goblins near you right now.
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“omg you’re so creative. how do you get your ideas” i hallucinate a single scene in the taco bell drive thru and then spend 13 months trying to write it
I must not explain the joke. Explaining the joke is the joke-killer. I will face my followers who did not get the joke. I will permit them to pass over me and through me
Writing Rage: How To Make Your Characters Seem Angry
Anger is a powerful emotion that can add depth and intensity to your character's personality. If you're facing issues realistically expressing your characters' rage, here are some quick tips to help you get the ball rolling. Whether your character is seething with quiet rage or exploding in a fit of fury, these tips will help you convey their emotions vividly to your readers.
Facial Expressions
Furrowed Brows: Describe the deep lines between their eyebrows, signaling frustration or intensity.
Tightened Jaw: Mention their clenched jaw, indicating suppressed anger or tension.
Narrowed Eyes: Highlight how their eyes narrow, showing suspicion, irritation, or anger.
Raised Upper Lip: Note the slight curl of the lip, suggesting disdain or contempt.
Flared Nostrils: Describe how their nostrils flare, indicating heightened emotions like anger or aggression.
Body Language and Gestures
Crossed Arms: Show their defensive stance, portraying resistance or defiance.
Pointing Finger: Describe them pointing accusatively, conveying aggression or assertion.
Fist Clenching: Mention their clenched fists, symbolizing anger or readiness for confrontation.
Hand Gestures: Detail specific hand movements like chopping motions, indicating frustration or emphasis.
Aggressive Posturing: Describe them leaning forward, invading personal space to intimidate or assert dominance.
Posture
Tense Shoulders: Highlight their raised or tense shoulders, indicating stress or readiness for conflict.
Upright Stance: Describe their rigid posture, showing control or a desire to appear strong.
Stiff Movements: Mention their jerky or abrupt movements, reflecting agitation or impatience.
Eye Contact
Intense Stares: Describe their intense or prolonged gaze, signaling confrontation or challenge.
Avoiding Eye Contact: Note how they avoid eye contact, suggesting discomfort or a desire to disengage.
Glaring: Mention how they glare at others, conveying hostility or disapproval.
Dialogue
Raised or strained tone with variations in pitch reflects heightened emotions.
Short, clipped sentences or abrupt pauses convey controlled anger.
Use of profanity or harsh language intensifies verbal expressions of anger.
Volume increase, from whispers to shouts, mirrors escalating anger levels.
Monotonous or sarcastic tone adds layers to angry dialogue.
Interruptions or talking over others signify impatience and frustration.
Aggressive verbal cues like "I can't believe..." or "How dare you..." express anger explicitly.
Reactions
Physical Reactions: Detail physical responses like increased heart rate, sweating, or trembling, showing emotional arousal.
Defensive Maneuvers: Describe how they react defensively if someone tries to touch or talk to them, such as stepping back or raising a hand to ward off contact.
Object Interaction
Aggressive Handling: Show them slamming objects, throwing things, or gripping items tightly, reflecting anger or aggression.
Use of Props: Mention how they use objects to emphasize their emotions, like slamming a door or clenching a pen.
Descriptive Words:
Verbs:
Roared with fury, expressing unbridled anger.
Snapped in frustration, indicating sudden irritation.
Shouted angrily, releasing pent-up emotions.
Glared fiercely, showing intense displeasure.
Slammed objects in rage, symbolizing anger's physical manifestation.
Grunted in annoyance, displaying impatience.
Raged vehemently, portraying uncontrolled anger.
Adjectives:
Furious and incensed, conveying intense anger.
Seething with rage, bubbling beneath the surface.
Livid and fuming, exhibiting visible anger.
Agitated and irritated, showing growing impatience.
Enraged and wrathful, expressing extreme anger.
Vexed and irate, indicating annoyance.
Infuriated and incandescent, highlighting explosive anger.
Looking For More Writing Tips And Tricks?
Are you an author looking for writing tips and tricks to better your manuscript? Or do you want to learn about how to get a literary agent, get published and properly market your book? Consider checking out the rest of Haya’s book blog where I post writing and publishing tips for authors every Monday and Thursday! And don’t forget to head over to my TikTok and Instagram profiles @hayatheauthor to learn more about my WIP and writing journey!
I've never understood why 'bitch' is such an insult. Like, my dude, have you actually spent time with a dog at all, male or female? I think I'd take the company of any dog I've ever met, bitch or otherwise, over a human who tried to use a comparison like that to denigrate me.
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you guys have NO idea how frustrated i am knowing those finisher lyrics are ORIGINAL FOR THIS TIKTOK and i CANT listen to this 20s speakeasy lounge sounding ass motherfucker just spit lyrical subjugation for whole albums at a time
So here I was trying to transcribe the lyrics when I found out that the first two verses were from Nature Boy by Nat King Cole. Anyway I’ve invested too much of myself into this so here they are:
Nat King Cole's Nature Boy + original lyrics, this is just gorgeous. I don't know the technical term for jazz rap, but this is a _beautiful_ example of it and I wish there was mroe and there _isn't_.
“She began to understand why lovers baby talk to one another. There was no other socially acceptable circumstance in which the children inside her were permitted to come out. If the one-year-old, the five-year-old, the twelve-year-old, and the twenty-year-old all find compatible personalities in the beloved, there is a real chance to keep all of those sub-personas happy. Love ends their long loneliness. Perhaps the depth of love can be calibrated by the number of different selves that are actively involved in a given relationship.”
My first supplement for Pathfinder 2 is finished and playtested! Includes rules for playing Griffon characters, although the scenario could be run for regular humanoids too :)
The adventure module is available on my website: https://www.daniellelinder.com/product/guardian-griffons/
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When Tina Turner left her first husband - who was also her boss, captor, and brutal tormentor - she snuck out of their Dallas hotel room with a single thought in her mind: "The way out is through the door."
From there she fled across the midnight freeway, semi-trucks careening past her, with 36 cents and a Mobil gas card in her pocket. As soon as she decided to walk out that door, she owned nothing else.
When she filed for divorce, she made an unusual request. She didn't want anything: not the song rights, not the cars, not the houses, not the money. All she wanted was the stage name he gave her - Tina - and her married name - Turner. This was the name by which the world had come to know her, and keeping it was her only chance to salvage her career.
Things could have gone a lot of ways from there. She could have labored in obscurity for decades, maybe making records on small labels to be prized by vinyl connoisseurs in Portland. She could have stayed in Vegas, where she first went to get her chops back up, and worked as a nostalgia act. And, of course, given what she had been through, she might have … not made it.
What happened instead is that Tina Turner became the biggest global rock star of the 80s. I'm old enough to barely remember this, but if you aren't, it was like this: The Rolling Stones would headline a stadium one day, and the next day it would be Tina Turner. A middle-aged Black woman - she became a rock star at 42! - sitting atop the 1980s like it was her throne.
She managed this because of whatever rare stuff she was made of (this is a woman whose label gave her two weeks to record her solo debut, Private Dancer, which went five times platinum); because she decided to speak publicly about her abusive marriage and forge her own identity, and in doing so give hope and courage to countless women; and also because - in a perhaps unlikely twist for a girl from Nutbush, Tennessee - she had her practice of Soka Gakkai Nichiren Buddhism, to which she credited her survival. She remained devout until the end.
Tina's second marriage - to her, her only marriage - was to Edwin Bach, a Swiss music executive 16 years her junior. Of him, she said, "Erwin, who is a force of nature in his own right, has never been the least bit intimidated by my career, my talents, or my fame."
In 2016, after a barrage of health problems, Tina's kidneys began to fail. A Swiss citizen by then, she had started preparing for assisted suicide when her husband stepped in. According to Tina, he said, "He didn't want another woman, or another life."
He gave her one of his kidneys, buying her the remainder of her time on this earth and perhaps closing a cycle which took her from a man who inflicted injury upon her to a man willing to inflict injury upon himself to save her from harm.
Born into a share-cropping family as Anna Mae Bullock in 1939, she died Tina Turner in a palatial Swiss estate: the queen of rock 'n roll; a storm of a performer with a wildcat-fierce voice; a dancer of visceral, spine-tingling potency and ability; a beauty for the ages; a survivor of terrible abuse and an advocate for others in similar situations; an author and actress; a devout Buddhist; a wife and mother; a human being of rare talent and perseverance who, through her transcendent brilliance, became a legend.
Neil, I’ve got the summer and I want to start learning scriptwriting. Any advice, other than just writing? I’ve written short stories and a book, but never written for screen. Thank you, have a great day if you can whether or not you see this!
Read scripts.
I've read a few books on scriptwriting, but thinking back on the places I felt I learned the most from, I wind up at David Gerrold's book on making The Trouble With Tribbles and an essay by Harlan Ellison in a book called The Craft of Science Fiction, edited by Reginald Bretnor (if memory serves).
I'm pretty sure this applies to any sort of writing. Want to write mystery short stories? Read some. Want to write graphic novels? Read some (and find a good artist to work with if you're not doing that part too). Want to write books for kids? Read some. Ideally out loud to kids so you can get good audience feedback.
Whatever you want to do, learn what you can from other sources, but also look at why you want to do the thing and learn from those examples.
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