🕸️emi🕸️

I hope Barbie is so good and successful it makes every executive that’s turned everything bright and fun made for young girls into edgy boring teen dramas for the last ten years spontaneously combust into flames

People being like "why is Ken just Ken" and thinking it's a gimmick for girl bossing Barbie clearly never watched Barbie Life in the Dream House because if they had they'd know that Ken is a very smart and capable guy but chooses to dedicate his life to Barbie because he loves her. He literally has a sixth sense for if Barbie is unhappy or needs something and will drop everything to help/cheer her up. Ken chooses not to pursue careers like Barbie does because it would interrupt his Barbie time. Ken is a self imposed trophy husband and I won't let people question his decision!

been selling spells on etsy lately. $50 a pop and i just send the customer a photo of a burnt candle. thank you mentally ill women 🙏🙏🙏

to all da lamers/haters out there: i only offer shitty spells like for making people break up, lose job/money, get sick etc. so all my customers deserve 2 get scammed. i am a moneymancer and my only real spell is summon dollar

carrie (1976) isn’t a piece of fiction btw. autistic ppl can just do that

“well she set a school on fire and she exploded a car and killed dozens of people” okay and ? she was overstimulated and covered in pig’s blood. i do the same thing when the tag on my shirt touches my neck wrong

we hit 20k great work everybody!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

wtf nobody told me there was a shrimp species named sexy shrimp

that wasn;t the file i clicked

if i was a medieval peasant and some weird guy from the future tried to give me doritos i would share a stew and beer with him. come man surely these frail dry flatbreads will not nourish you as well as a hearty meal. eat with me

if i was a medieval peasant and some weird guy from the future tried to show me tweets i would stab him with my pitchfork until he stops moving

See. Monarchical virtue in action

this isnt real this never actually happened. i made it up.

gods greatest punishment was putting 1 trillion cool rocks on earth and no one with eyes big enough to see them all

*gets scared and throws one of my cool rocks at your fourhead*

i was so angry at everything when i was 15. and i was right

why does this post self destruct

Dennys only succeeded here because we allowed it to, if you want to avoid the adpocalypse keep supporting our local home grown shitposters and ignore any attempts from corporations to create a dennys 2

*bottles up emotions* this coping shits easy