No Darling here.

I'm pretty sure that's an owl actually

Do it scared but please don't do it hungry. Please don't do it dehydrated. It's gonna make it so much scarier. Please.

For years, sci-fi has asked, what if aliens were wetter than us. Project Hail Mary posits a new, daring question. What if we are the wet aliens

you were born in 2006? what are you? a Honda Civic?

can i fucking help you?

How do cats just manifest trash. You’ll vacuum your entire house and turn around and your cat will be running around with a kind of cardboard that didn’t exist until two seconds ago.

also I don't think parents "these days" are uniquely terrible, I just think neglect is showing up in new ways as technology progresses. today's ipad kid would've been wandering around in a ditch alone all day and night before. parents not wanting to have to deal with children is not a new phenomenon.