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thoughts

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everything is in conflict all the time! <- someone who is about to burn out
under my totalitarian regime being a housewife will not be allowed. you WILL become an accomplished scientist
how it feels to mark a book currently reading on storygraph
HEY! what's so alluring about an abrahamic religion?

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itâs 2026 i think itâs high time we left mind-body dualism behind us as a species. letâs go into 2027 with the full understanding that we are our bodies and that our consciousness cannot be separated from them thank you
june is going to kiss you. Mwah
having a crush is wrong and isnât natural

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you have to remember that a good life can still be lived without the concepts of any of the things you want to get over yourself. people are literally living it
there was a brief moment early this spring when everything was possible
although allegedly you're allowed to love your body, now, as a girl, you're actually not allowed to love that it grows a mustache or a beard
Edwardian 15ct Gold Harlequin Fringe Necklace with Heart Shaped Centre Gemstone
c. 1910
Christ Depicted with Breasts in âThe Lamentation of Christ by the Holy Women,â 16th century Belgian painting
ID: a Renaissance style painting of the dead body of Jesus laid out on a slab with white fabric draping it, surrounded by angels and women in robes of red, green, and white along with Mother Mary in blue. The women and angels all look sad and prayerful. Jesus (along with everyone else in the painting) is depicted as European, with pale skin and light brown hair and beard; his body is naked except for a white fabric draped over his hips. His arms are crossed along his stomach, just below his round breasts / end id.
In 16th-century Lessines, Belgium, a convent of nuns who provided hospice care for women was adorned with the above painting. Why did its artist decide to depict Jesus with breasts?
Jonas Atlas offers context in a Medium article, âChrist with Boobs,â which quotes a description of the painting by the Belgian museum that now houses it:
This intriguing painting, dating from the end of the 16th century, portrays a lying Christ, surrounded by the saintly women of Saint-John. Look very carefully at the representation of Christ in this image: he was painted with female breasts. Such images of Christ as a spiritual father and mother, refer to several religious and mystical writings that lend Christ feminine and motherly features. Christ has placed his hand on his breast and thus offers âspiritual nourishmentâ to the sisters.
According to Atlasâs article, this depiction of Christ with breasts was âdeemed inappropriate and painted overâ in the 19th century, but rediscovered and restored in the 1990s.
For Atlas, this painting serves as a reminder that there have been expressions of Christianity throughout time that revered an androgynous Christ, and uplifted the feminine alongside the masculine: âIt shows how the view on the essence of religion drastically changed during the periods which are called âthe Enlightenmentâ and âModernityâ. It shows how mystical and mythological thinking were gradually denied, âpainted overâ and forgotten â not because of âmalestream religionâ but because of changes in our modern â and quite binary â way of thinking.â
In the Epilogue that closes the 2021 text Trans and Genderqueer Subjects in Medieval Hagiography, Mathilde van Dijk suggests that one reason this painting depicted Jesus with breasts is to reassure the nuns and female patients who viewed it that Christ shares in their particular suffering. He is not solely masculine, set apart from them, but feminine too, as this painting that âdepicts his multiple genders, his motherliness and his agonies all at onceâ emphasizes.
Van Dijk summarizes many of the ways that scholars believe Christ was revered as androgynous and/or feminine in Medieval Europe, and how his androgyny served as a model for the Saints who followed him to join him in gender nonconformity (paragraph breaks added for accessibility):
âSaints are special, not the least because they are capable of transgressing seemingly fixed gender categories, as is their model, Christ, who was God and human at the same time.
As God, He would be beyond gender, but as Caroline Walker Bynum and other researchers have argued, the same is true as far as His body is concerned. Flexible, suffering and emitting liquids such as blood, it was similar to a womanâs body, despite Christâs traditional assignment as a man. In her seminal monograph Holy Feast and Holy Fast, Bynum stressed the motherly capacity of His body to provide food [e.g. in the Eucharist], thus enhancing the connection to women, who can also provide food through their bodies. âŚ
Sophie Sexonâs analyses in the present collection strengthen Bynumâs arguments considerably. Not only do Christâs wounds, specifically the side wound, appear similar to female genitals, but these and other images were also used to help in womenâs ordeals such as childbirth or menstruation. The birthing girdles that were laid across the bodies of women in labour are Sexonâs most striking example: the suffering of Christ and the suffering of women were connected.
They also examine the haptic practices around manuscripts, in which readers would touch and kiss texts and miniatures. Direct contact with the wound would draw the readers closer to Christ, even into him, thus dissolving the boundaries between him and the believer, who would come to share his gender fluidity, as did the saints. (van Dijk, p. 275)
FURTHER READING:
Quotes in my #trans Jesus tag and my #God beyond gender tag, such as this post featuring a prayer of Saint Anselm that asks âAnd you, Jesus, are you not also a mother?âŚâ and this post with a early Christian Syrian text imagining God with breasts
The section of this webpage titled âAssigned Male at Incarnation: An Intersex and Transgender Jesusâ
The section of this webpage titled âThe Androgynous Christâ

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Necklace from Mysore, India; early 1960s
the wisdom ive learnt is that becoming part of a friend group 1) takes a long time and 2) involves a lot of feeling awkward and left out at first. thereâs nothing terrible about this but if you grew up chronically lonely or have any kind of trauma relating to social isolation this likely feels Really Wrong and activates danger signals. but both fortunately and unfortunately itâs just how becoming close to new people works most of the time
another thing that was not intuitive to me as someone who grew up an autistic loner: basically everyone on the planet is starved for connection all the time and almost everything people do is an attempt to reach out to another. most seemingly illogical interactions and behaviours can be explained by this. you have to take as many of these invitations as you can. even if you're wrong you still attempted to bring more warmth into the world