suamizi doomed yuri fic now ✌️ pronto! asap!
“if you would let me give you pinky promise kisses.”
contents; gut wrenching mizisua angst , mizi and sua are in a established relationship before sua’s death , this is kinda buns
a/n; first alnst request ahhhh!!! i hope this is to your standards oomf! i don’t usually write for ships but all my homies love mizisua so might as well
Mizi feels like she’s drowning.
She physically can’t stop sobbing. Hyperventilating, Mizi buries her head into the palms of her trembling hands, wiping tears in a desperate, futile attempt to calm herself just for more to flow out. Even Shine couldn’t do anything to help. This was the most upset she’d seen her in a long time.
She tries to imagine Sua next to her in an attempt to calm down. She used to bury her head into her chest whenever she got upset. Even if it was something trivial, Sua would gingerly run her hands through her baby pink strands in an effort to soothe her, murmuring soft reassurances to her in the softest and most precious way. In Mizi’s eyes, Sua was sublime.
Through choked out sobs, Mizi babbles her name like a mantra, as if maybe the nth time she said it, Sua would suddenly come back. Come back to her and wrap her arms around her, telling her everything is okay. Yet, no matter how many times Mizi uttered her name, no one was there to answer her.
Why wouldn’t Sua tell her? For her own good? To protect her? She tries to understand as hard as she can, how she could see things from Sua’s point of view, but right now to her, it doesn’t matter why Sua left her. The fact is she did leave, and it’s tearing Mizi apart. It doesn’t matter what Sua’s reasons or motives were, the pain is still there, and there’s no simple way to get rid of it. She just wants her girlfriend back.
Her throat feels dry and raw from crying for so long. She slowly curls tighter into the same fetal position and hugs her pillow tight, her right arm subconsciously hugging herself, trying to simulate the feeling of Sua being there. But a part of Mizi knows it’s not her. It doesn't have the same warmth as Sua's body. It doesn't have the same sweet, comforting smell of vanilla Sua always had. No matter how hard she squeezes the pillow, it'll never come close to the real thing. Yet she still hopes.
With Sua still on her mind, her brain replays some of the best memories she had with her, which is basically all the time they spent in each other’s presence.
Memories of them playing around in the ANAKT GARDEN flood into her head. Mizi bringing the black-haired girl the flowers there, or vaguely heart-shaped rocks. Catching that odd-looking fish in the river and crying over it. Chasing each other in various games of tag, the feeling of the grass underfoot when she and Sua were running through it together. The feel of her girlfriend’s skin under her own when she’d hold her hand. The sound of her laugh earned by Mizi doing non-sensical things just to hear it once more. Mizi holding up her dress up to Sua, seeing how the cream-colored dress would look against her complexion.
As fatigue from her crying begins to take over her, Mizi slowly drifts off to sleep with the feeling of emptiness still heavy in her chest. Hoping, wishing, praying that when she wakes up, she’ll see that familiar face and hear that beautiful laugh of her love, right next to her.
