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Here’s your pass, and here’s a ticket for the special exhibits. For most people I’ve brought here, I wasn’t able to get those extras comped, only the general admission ticket. For you, (because you’re so special) I really went all out though. Also you were watching the Artemis trip and right now one of the special exhibits is all about the history of lunar exploration and I thought you’d like it! I know it sucks that we aren’t going through them together, I’ve still got a little bit left of my shift 😓 but enjoy your look around babe !! We can go through them again together when I get off work, when I get to give you a private tour.

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Thanks for waiting baby!! Omg you brought me a coffee, you shouldn’t have!! Huh. Is that Hazelnut creamer? Yeah hmm I thought so. Okay.

I was thinking I’ll take you down into the archives. Yeah this building is actually 4 buildings renovated together plus a fifth thats separate. So it’s pretty hard to navigate around if you don’t know what you’re doing. So stick close to me, you don’t know what you’re doing about anything 😭

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It took me a while to find this place. They all used to be scattered, but after the lawsuit they all became their own section.

…… Hmm. Hehe. No, I’m not laughing at you, your question is just funny. Huh? Oh, you said “What are they?” but the question should really be “Who are they?”, if you think about it. . .

You followed me blindly through these halls, didn’t even bother to ask me where we were going, and I’ll bet you don’t even know what fucking floor we’re on. Actually, how many floors does this building have. No? You need to give me an answer. You need to give me one. “If you don’t?” ?? If you don’t give me one, I’ll hit you. I’m serious! Here, just make a guess.

Oh, my god. Are you serious? No fucking way you’re actually that stupid. You have gotta be playing this up or something.

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Don’t ask me what’s in the boxes. I’m asking you, so fucking tell me what’s in them. Why do you think I brought you down here, huh? No that one was rhetorical.

What do you mean, “when you get out”? What do you think is happening here?

Oh, no, no, if I was doing this just to rape and kill you I would have finished that by now. It’s kinda funny how much you underestimate me babe, it could almost be insulting. There’s plenty of time for all of that later. (and trust me we will be getting to that)

No, look at me. Look at me. Look at me. Shut up. Say “Thank you.” Thank you what? Mhm, right. Good. :)

Why am I doing this? Well, actually, it’s probably not for the reasons you think, although I’m not sure how much thinking you do in the first place.

The museum has tons of storage for everything “important,” but yk most of it will never be looked at again. Most of the regular exhibits are set forever. And this room of course will never be displayed again most likely, but they’re having a hard time returning them, and they dont want to sell or destroy them. No, ugh, don’t ask me why. You know why. Put that fucking thinking cap on.

What, you’re not satisfied? I don’t get it :( Oh… you mean why you. There’s not a reason, you were just the only person who responded to my dating profile lol. Must have been pretty desperate, serves you right I suppose.

So I guess I’m just curious as to how long a ““person”” can survive in this type of self contained environment. Shut up alreadyyy there’s over 30 million other specimen in this building. I promise, you’ll make do with that lol it’s not that serious. Plus, nobody will find you. There is no way to accidentally stumble across this room. its a LL1 room that can only be accessed from the third floor. Kind of the perfect place to keep my torture subject.

Aww you don’t want to? I actually did think of that. The other option is you live chained up in the break room and I let all my work buddies go for it. I promise they would not be nearly as gentle as I am. And I’m gonna be beating you with a cane so that must really be saying something.

Ugh can you shut up and stop crying. Yes those are your only two options. I don’t understand what your problem is. You’re only making this worse for yourself.