I'm having a bad night and this will be rambling. Viola is clearly in pain and we have a vet appointment for Friday that I am hoping we can make, as I've been sick all week. We were supposed to go to the vet on Monday, but I had to reschedule since that was the day I first got sick. Tonight, I had to debate whether or not to take the nighttime medication in case she needs me in the night and I don't wake up. But if I don't take that, I might not get better in time to take her to the vet on Friday. She was purring and reactive, so I decided to take the meds and I am hoping she is fine and doesn't need me until she's hungry in the morning.
I just want us both to be healthy and peaceful for a bit. April and May were two of the lowest months of my life worrying about her and now that I can finally take some steps forward, I'm sick and going out of town and I'm so fucking stressed out. I'm worried something will happen while I'm gone and Viola won't get the care she needs (the catsitter I have is free but not the best in emergent situations). I need the vet to say she's fine on Friday or give me something concrete to do that'll have her good as new by July.
I had a few days of peace and a plan and then it all went to shit and now I just want to cry and I want my mom.
