i'm normal i swear

i was putting off watching episode 3 cuz i wanted to be able to focus on work and lestat did canadian 9/11. like i turn on my tv and lestat blows up the cn tower because he's in a bad mood? i agree its not the prettiest building in the world but??? the aquarium is right next door??? it for sure got destroyed by debris??? does lestat know he killed a ton of fish and urchins and crabs and octopi??? will he say sorry???

actually wait i have an important question. why and how does gabriella have a phone? did lestat send it to them? they don’t have an address so how did that work? does lestat have to send them an updated model every time they break it? do they have a data plan? is he paying the roaming fees for their nomad shit? who gave them the mom-wallet-phone-case? do they have games on their phone? what level are they in candy crush?

one thing i’m yet to see brought up in discussions about gabi’s gender being erased from the show is that it’s stated multiple times in tvl alone that they present more femininely when around lestat, ESPECIALLY when lestat is more mentally unwell, because it “makes him happy.” there’s that, the way lestat regularly expresses dysphoria when forced into being hypermasculine, and how one of their first full conversations this season has lines like “we wore the same costume” and “i saw myself in [your face]”. this is because transgenderism is based on radius to another trans person, i guess

okay so if season one had a jelly roll morton cameo and season two had a jean-paul sartre cameo who do we think is getting a season 3 random-famous-historical-figure-who-is-apparently-cool-with-vampires cameo. personally my money is on trisha paytas

god louis is so funny what the fuck was his plan. hmm i know what will make my husband forgive me after i hugely betrayed his trust, revealed his trauma to millions, and made it sound like i never loved him in the process: i will pretend to be a powerful rich man blackmailing him into sex

man i’m really sad that they seem to be ignoring gabrielle’s transmasculinity in the tv adaptation, it’s such an important part of their character. like, ik that this is a bad time to have a transgender incestuous pedophile in a main role on tv, but their transgenderism is literally the motive for- oh wait nevermind i get it

my realest fear with s3 isn’t about the portrayal of the trans stuff or the incest stuff but actually i really fear that nobody is gonna believe how much of a disney princess lestat is. non-book-readers have only ever seen him be a theatre kid, hot, abusive, and have severe bpd they have no idea lestat is actually cinderella, ariel, bluebeard’s bride, and rapunzel at the same time. like just because he’s gonna be doing MOUNTAINS of cocaine next season doesn’t mean we get to forget the fact that he once grabbed a rat off of the floor of a crowded shop so he could look at its toepads and appreciate its life (louis would never he'd eat it)

the thing about tvl's music is that instead of being a normal musical they've cracked the code on how to write a song in the exact way that lestat de lioncourt himself would write it, which sadly comes with lestat's personality. this is why we hear incredible and gutwrenching lyrics like "i know you're stubborn but you have to ask for it, i'm a dog and you're my brave little wolf killer" and "did the flavour of my failures prove good enough to gild your gaping wound" but we also have to suffer lyrics like "give me your piss, ha" and nobody can really criticize it because that’s exactly what lestat would write

lesmand is by far the funniest relationship in tvc because you really would think that it’d be a good ship considering how similar they are but instead lestat meets his narrative mirror and immediately goes “wow okay i’m not doing that. that relationship seems like it’d be really toxic. i'm going to protect my peace, and not begin a romantic relationship with this person. there are other vampire fish in the sea like The Pedophile or The Other Pedophile or The Other Other-“ and armand spends the next century with a portrait of lestat on his bedroom wall and lies to a reporter about them dating