Living The Life Of A Couch Potato

Sono Fratelli di Felpa!!!!

"Non ti lascio perché ti voglio bene"

"Con te è diverso"

Permets-tu?

"Hi, yes um- This is Jaskier, from the uh- cottage down the road?"

"The one with the flowers? Is there a problem?"

"Yes um- You see, this may sound a bit crazy but uh- there's a horse in my garden. My fenced off garden. And while that's not exactly a problem, the last time I checked I didn't own a horse so-"

[you can hear Geralt sigh]

"I know, I know. It's not even six in the morning, terrible time for a rescue mission if you ask me."

"Honestly I have no idea how or why Roach keeps escaping. You really must be fed up with this, I'm sorry."

"Oh, nonsense! She's a darling, really. I think she just wants to visit Petunia and her newborn babies."

"Petunia?"

"My cat, rescued her not all too long ago, the two ladies love headbutting each other, it's adorable. But I could live without the giant horse poop on my porch."

"Im on my way."

“Fuck, not again!”

“No, no, no! My porch is actually horse poop-free this fine morning. Has been for a few weeks, now. I just wanted to check in if everything’s alright with Roach? Haven’t seen the beautiful lady in a while and… yeah.”

[Geralt hums] “Roach is fine. You could come over and visit her, you know? Bring Petunia while you’re at it.”

“Me coming over to you? Oh, how the stables have turned.”

…

…

“Did you just—“

“Yeah, I’m hanging up now.”

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