♡

𖥔 anxious little boy, everywhere at all times, no matter where he is or who he’s with. He always has a hand on Nasha or M18 or even both and that helps a little bit, but his grip is like a lifeline and his eyes are always darting everywhere. 

𖥔 sleeping between both of them makes it better. it’s only when he’s asleep (which is rare) that the cortisol pumping through him grants him reprieve. his body relaxes with the warm soothing hands of Nasha through his hair and M18’s running up and down his back. 

𖥔 M18 is seemingly always angry and searching for revenge, he is hardened by frustration, neglect, and abuse. But somehow, by the grace of an earth they can only remember, he is gentle with M17. Always wants to be touched by him and Nasha just to make sure he’s alive, that he’s real. That he is, above all, allowed to live. 

𖥔 Both have a problem with depersonalization, especially M17, 18 struggles with it in private, feeling his own personal struggles aren’t worth being aired out. Especially when M17 takes precedence over him, it feels. It builds into slow resentment and he has no idea how to remedy it until he’s crying into M17’s shoulder–he could never tell Nasha what he’s feeling. But it eventually gets around to her regardless and all of a sudden her warm hand is on his face and she’s sliding a comforting thumb up and down his cheek. He doesn’t need to be told he deserves to live, he knows better than anyone what he and M17 deserves (and by all means he will get it for them.) He just wants to feel loved. 

𖥔 Kai sometimes comes around to watch both of them. She’s in slightly better standing and there is a conveniently placed newly refurbished maternity ward right across from her room and so she brings plenty of snacks, baba’s, and pacis. She thinks M17 in particular is adorable when he’s snuggled up to his makeshift puppy plush, gripping her hand while he sleeps, adorning him with as many trinkets as she can find because he is always so grateful and so sweet to her and everyone around him. 

𖥔 Mickey 17 is admittedly, very curious and clumsy. Uncoordinated. It is later found out that he struggles with motor skills as a whole, and has since he was physically a baby. It frustrates him to no end- it seems M18 has inherited all of his cool traits and determined stubbornness and affinity for murder (?) while he’s just the weird nerd who watches cartoons with his legs crossed and a stupid bottle because he can’t be around an open cup without spilling it. M18 is quick to comfort him in Nasha’s place. “You’re stronger than both of us, all that you’ve gone through and are still going through. We deserve this Mick, we need this.” And then there's Nasha and her syrupy way with words. “This is for you Mickey, my little boy. You’re good at everything they put you up to, and now I need you to be good at this, right here, right now. Relax, okay? Let mumma take care of you.” and Kai who always comes bearing gifts. “After everything I’ve seen, this is by far the one I’d prefer the most. If anything, you are silly for believing that this is silly. Because you still get up everyday, you still do what they ask of you, and you’re still here, with us.” Nothing they say really quells the burning resentment he has for himself, but it makes him feel better. 

𖥔 All three of them, Kai, Nasha, and M18, are equally touchy, and so is he. Grabbing onto their clothes, messing with their fingers, whining and rolling on the floor for them to come sit with and watch cartoons with him on his little palette of blankets he’s made. In turn they card their fingers through his hair, kiss him on his cheek and forehead, hug and snuggle him tightly, walk their fingers up his arms until he’s giggling.