i will block people. I cant deal with the people who will disagree, and therefore completely prove the point of what i am saying and conveying. People lack empathy and the understanding of nuance which many people would benefit from. We as a society need to steer away from generalizations and generalizing statements such as all or none or never or always. The world needs nuance because without it we lose the goal, we lose each other, we lose understanding and kindness and therefore prolong trauma and a ongoing harmful cycle.
Ive been thinking about this a lot but there's a strange double standard when it comes to SA, the perpetrator and the victim.
Yes i know the statistics of men sa'ing women is more reported and known
but that does not make it correct to bring it up when a man is discussing his experience with being assaulted by either a man or woman.
If you are the type of person to bring up 'oh well men assault women more' while a man is discussing his experience with assault,
You dont truly care about vicitms.
Youre a bad person, even if you are a victim yourself.
Using a common statistic in that manner invalidates the minority group, silences voices and harms every victim in the long run and causes a divide.
It creates this normalization of a heinous crime and a vision of what it must look like which is insanely damaging and reverses the efforts to prevent such things, protect victims, and help heal. Safe spaces are nearly non-existent for minority group vicitms or those that dont fit the 'standard'.
I have seen a digusting influx of people mocking or invalidating men who speak about their SA trauma. Yes, including their CSA trauma.
If you are someone who does that where you invalidate them because they are a man and you want to theow statistics and invalidate a minority group, including when they discuss being a CSA survivor, you are a bad person and you don't actually care about other victims. Or even young boys.
Because you can say you hate pedophiles but those victims, the boys, they grow into the men that you invalidate with your statistics about SA. it's even worse on POC and queer minorities when you do this behavior at all.
you cant invalidate anothers SA trauma based upon their gender or the gender of their attacker and claim to be a activist or care about children or victims.
Statistics dont mean much in the long run.
We cannot and SHOULD NOT isolate or create hostile environments where the vicitms cannot speak about their own experiences without them being told they dont matter because theyre not the majority thats discussed.
We also should not normalize what a victim looks like or is most commonly like. We need to hold every perpetrator accountable regardless of their identity and we need to uplift and protect every victim regardless of their idenity too.
This goes for all. Yes the post mainly discusses men being assaulted by men or women and being invalidated, but it applies to all. this is just a rise in bad behavior i have seen recently.
Throwing a victim blaming statement at a man, (like 'what was he wearing' on a post while someone is discussing a man's SA) and invalidating his experience because you have your own anger, your own trauma, does not help the movement or society. it turns you from a victim or caring human into an abuser.
You are prolonging the pain and system.
You only want power and to hurt someone else.
this is exactly what predators do for a power trip. thats what assault is. Power trip.
you are an abuser and predatory if you do this
if you do this stuff and behaviors
and it prevents minority victims from coming forward or realizing what happened to them even if the severity of the assault or harassment varies.
deserves a safe space and to be heard. To be listened too.
You can be empathetic too.
Youre just choosing not to be
yousharknotpass
snowghoul
romaincrisis
dededos
turnnoffyourmind
