links: instagram substack
tags: #hj for posts created by me #creatinghelen for original art and poetry #songs by helen for (you guessed it) music recommendations
prev url: berecovered <3
TVSTRANGERTHINGS

KIROKAZE

if i look back, i am lost
h
Noah Kahan

oozey mess

gracie abrams
Cosmic Funnies

Discoholic 🪩
almost home
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
Stranger Things
noise dept.
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
RMH
The Bowery Presents

PR's Tumblrdome
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@creatinghelen
links: instagram substack
tags: #hj for posts created by me #creatinghelen for original art and poetry #songs by helen for (you guessed it) music recommendations
prev url: berecovered <3

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Rest = Lying Down, Eyes Closed Because other parts of the program from England made sense, I decided to try resting every afternoon. After some experimentation, I determined that the most restorative rest resulted from lying down in a quiet place with my eyes closed. I was surprised at the results from taking a 15-minute rest in mid-afternoon. Even that short break seemed to help, reducing my symptoms, increasing my stamina and making my life more stable. After a while I added a similar rest in late morning. Over time, I came to believe that my scheduled rest was the most important strategy I used in my recovery. Resting everyday according to a fixed schedule, not just when I felt sick or tired, was part of a shift from living in response to symptoms to living a planned life. The experience showed me that rest could be used for more than recovering from doing too much; it could be employed as a preventive measure as well. In the terms suggested by someone in our self-help program, I learned the difference between recuperative rest and pre-emptive rest. Surprisingly, taking pre-emptive rests greatly reduced the time I spent in recuperative rest, because I was experiencing much less Post-Exertional Malaise. The result was that my total rest time was reduced.
sometimes like an idiot i assume everyone has read bruce campbell on resting/pacing to handle post-exertional malaise affiliated with chronic fatigue. that is obviously not true! anyway here's the hot guide, i linked straight to the "schedule in mandatory complete 15 min rest as part of your day and hopefully you will get to do less surprise many hours of rest to recover" section but the whole thing is laid out pretty clearly
Last year, I befriended a Catholic seminarian. We've gotten to be pretty decent friends. Seeing as he was staying in town for the summer and I wasn't, I entrusted him with caring for my plant.
He did a wonderful job, but as he was returning my plant to my custody, he explained "I watered her every other day, I gave her new dirt, moved her into the sunshine, prayed the rosary-"
"What?"
He looked at me, confused. "Isn't she a plant you pray with?"
"No," I said slowly. "She's a prayer plant. That's the... colloquial name of the plant."
Upon seeing his stricken face, I realized something went wrong. Turns out, this entire time, he's been including my plant in on his prayers and leaving her near icons.
Listen, totally cool. My plant becoming Catholic is a great deal for her not dying over the summer. But now I must navigate this interfaith household. Keep me in your thoughts.
#i love prayer plants but they're fussy so I don't keep them#can we have a picture op they're so pretty
Behold, Dorothea
(Naming my plant "Gift of God," and then giving her to a seminarian with just the explanation that it's a prayer plant? Okay, that's my bad.)
I should also add- I ran into my rabbi and explained the situation. I then asked, earnestly, if there was a remedy. A mikveh of sorts, or a beit din, or something.
He turned to me, sighed, and said in a very deadpan tone-- "Plants don't have covenants, Joy,"
So Theodora's a free agent according to rabbinic opinion. I guess I'll permit her to be Roman Catholic.
i was training a young person at work, and she referred to sexual assault as "SA" out loud, and i immediately was like, "no, it's sexual assault, call it what it is," bc idgaf if the algorithm overlords have taught y'all that you should fear direct language, how tf do any of you expect to ever address real issues with any amount of seriousness if you can't even say the words? imagine an advocate looking a sexual assault survivor in the eyes and asking "did he grape you?" it's absolutely fucking absurd, but these young interns and new hires are coming into an environment where we deal with survivors of all different kinds of abuse, and they're coming with the mindset that the words are as bad as the actions, and that makes them shitty at the job and look juvenile af
i HATE self-censorship for a lot of reasons, but being in crisis work makes it even more frustrating. who are you censoring for? like i am being so fr, WHO are you censoring for? have you even thought it through? people who have been raped know that they have been raped. if someone attempts suicide or is grieving someone who did, saying "sewer slide" isn't going to protect them from any of the feelings. a murder victim's family isn't going to feel better bc you said "unalived" instead of murdered. if anything, it's just extremely invalidating and othering. it's saying "what happened to you is so bad that i won't even say the word," which is NOT trauma-informed care. you are not protecting survivors/victims when you self-censor. the ONLY things you protect when you self-censor are the puritanical ideologies that are being encouraged by rich fascists who want your money and obedience
say the fucking words, guys. just say the goddamn words before i go insane!!!
you literally just have to keep forgiving yourself

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reminder to breathe
my house is scary at night
Interpreted this initially not as shelves, but as your cat having erected defensive fortifications
I will make a beautiful life for myself no matter how long it takes. I will I will I will
ur clothes size doesnt say anything. like it doesnt say anything abt u as a person but it also especially doesnt say anything about what size your clothes are

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it’s a beautiful day to check out a book from the library
its a beautiful day to return a book to the library unread after it auto renews 3 times
The library says thank you for boosting our circulation stats and the book will still be here later if you want it another time <3
I LOVE LIBRARY
WE LOVE LIBRARY USERS
if you’re in this situation you can still get a Queer Liberation Library card!!
queer books, for free, for anyone anywhere in the usa. we’ve tried to make it as easy as possible to sign up
I think part of the reason why we feel so sad is that we're too far away from raw, numinous experiences. Like you know that post with a picture of the unpolluted night sky where people are reacting in terrified awe not realizing that's what the stars really look like?
I think it's like. You need vivid experiences that can't be easily repeated. You need elemental things. I don't mean this in a crunchy hippie just-try-yoga way I mean this in a way that's like...we're inside all the time and most things we experience are scheduled ahead of time. When there are sidewalks, we follow them, and there's always some boring place to go. You need things that no one has any control over and that no one can sell for money.
You need to be outside in a storm and see lightning strike very close to you. You need to meet a wild creature and have to stand very still and almost not even breathe and watch before it vanishes. You need to be alone somewhere very big. You need to go to a place because it looks interesting and be at the wrong place at the wrong time. You need to climb over a fence instead of going in by the gate. You need to hear the exploding sound of a huge flock of birds flying. You need to watch live theater performed by kids on a low budget. You need to be lost somewhere. You need to be barefoot somewhere. You need to sing with other people who are singing. You need to get soaking wet with all of your clothes on and come inside shivering.
May all of you find jobs and careers to support yourselves, your families, your pets, and may you never spend a single night dreading going to work the next day. May your jobs be fulfilling, safe, rewarding, prosperous, and healthy for you and your goals.
has anyone figured out how to turn off the thing where you love your pet so much it slides inexorably into grief-borrowing
“For me this glass is already broken. I enjoy it; I drink out of it. It holds my water admirably, sometimes even reflecting the sun in beautiful patterns. If I should tap it, it has a lovely ring to it. But when I put this glass on the shelf and the wind knocks it over or my elbow brushes it off the table and it falls to the ground and shatters, I say, ‘Of course.’ When I understand that the glass is already broken, every moment with it is precious.”
fuuuuck i just realized that the future idealized version of myself cant exist without current me being the catalyst for change and doing hard things. has anybody heard about this

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Find a humanitarian organization near you and volunteer with them. Do it. I mean it. Even like one day a week. Even an HOUR a week. This shit will change you in the best ways. Your circle will fill with cool people. THE HELPERS-- FIND THEM and then BE THEM
Being in close contact with people who give a shit and are also witnessing the descent of our country into fascism and ACTUALLY DOING SOMETHING ABOUT IT is actually mad refreshing in contrast to the pointless noise that is the internet.
You'll make such fast friends if you:
show up
say "where do you need me"
do what they say
have a good attitude
Done. Easy. Volunteering is awesome and will put you right in the lap of the best people in your area. They're the helpers, they're the people Mr. Rogers told you about!
Doing an easy task like potting trees for a community garden or helping at a food bank will also connect you to people who are doing more, like immigrant support or things that tackle more urgent, dangerous issues going on. So you can scale up your involvement easily by just showing up repeatedly.
Or don't scale it up-- maybe you stop at helping at the food bank and you're stacking cans for a few hours. You're feeding your neighbors. That's a load-bearing part of any revolution. (I use that word optimistically.) The people you meet will be the people you lean on when shit gets worse.
AND VICE VERSA, prove that you are someone to lean ON by showing up and helping. Offer things to people. Your skills may be helpful. Already, just because we've done local volunteering, we have made at least 5 or 6 new friends, got a potential firewood connection, and WELL-PAID EMPLOYMENT (??? OMG)
(and free lunches and snacks and fruit trees) And it's healing as fuck to have people genuinely tell you, in the flesh, to your face, "I'm so glad you showed up today. I appreciate you so much. This would have been harder without you." That shit makes you feel AWESOME and REAL and PURPOSEFUL
(We woke up early for a shift at the food bank, I'm hyping myself up because I am not a morning person LMAO) But yeah volunteering is such a good way to build security and community. There's something for everyone to help with, just get out there and show up, first.
Started volunteering 3 hours a week at a queer community center and it has helped boost my morale so much. There’s something magical about needing a safe space and then becoming apart of that safe space. Helping others really does help/heal you.
I'm no longer searching for my purpose. I'm living my purpose. I'm walking right in it. And each moment I'm alive I'm unfolding more layers of it.
Your existence is your purpose