Look at that

Yeah man, this wizard sleepover is cozy. I just saw a guy gently clap his hands together and say "hot beverage conjuration" or something, and suddenly everyone was holding a perfect mug of their favorite warm drink in their hands. Nobody who was already sleeping even woke up, that's how cozy it is. I'm over here casting pillow and level 2 pyjamas. I think I just heard "power word: blanket fort" two groups over. I gotta get in there.

no one is coming to save yo- wrong!! everyone who has ever shown you love and/or care is saving you a little bit.

people keep telling me its "narcissistic" to build an army out of clones of myself but it'd be a lot weirder if they were clones of someone else right

i think one of the best parts about being a teenager in the early to mid 2010s was that cigarettes were definitely not cool anymore and vapes hadn’t popularized yet so my lungs made it out of my peak impressionable years relatively unscathed

im so sorry that you're doomed by the narrative but i really need you to answer my message on Microsoft Teams

You have to pee in the shower to get into heaven

i dont even know where the bit ends and i begin