obsessed bc she DOES tone it down a little a second later
(i added the video because its ending me)

@theartofmadeline

Andulka
RMH
h
taylor price
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
todays bird
tumblr dot com
we're not kids anymore.
Cosimo Galluzzi

Product Placement
One Nice Bug Per Day
NASA
untitled

tannertan36
Three Goblin Art

Kaledo Art

seen from Malaysia
seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from Netherlands

seen from Nigeria

seen from United States

seen from Myanmar (Burma)
seen from Jordan
seen from Palestinian Territories
seen from United States

seen from Côte d’Ivoire
seen from Mexico

seen from United States
seen from Australia

seen from United Kingdom
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from Germany
seen from Netherlands
@cosmically-mangled
obsessed bc she DOES tone it down a little a second later
(i added the video because its ending me)

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Howl and Sophie 🌸
trans women be having complicated relationships with transmisogynyistic media
rot and waste is a banquet to the starving creature
i love the way you said this
So there are some perks to living in a tourist destination. There are a lot of detractors mostly that you cannot shoot the tourists because you rely on them for your income but you have a semi captive audience with no context for any of the bullshit you spew. You can tell these people anything and they will believe you, the trusted friendly local. Now this is a very much Spider-Man situation where Great Power begets Great Audacity and even worse Responsibility.
My buddy goes on a run and when hes done there is a bar near a creek. So he wades into the creek because the day is hot and the water is cold.
Tourists ask what hes up to, with his running stuff he didn't want wet piled on the shore and him very obviously cooling off in the water. He says he's fishing.
But now here is why I am telling you this story. The universe occasionally aligns in such a way that we get to really really fuck with people and their perception of said universe. The opportunities do not come often and when they come you must seize the day. This is what my buddy did.
So this Creek runs through town and as a result of the highway and neighborhoods and culverts and roads it does not have a great salmon run. It's a short Creek the headwaters are only a few miles from the ocean it never had a great salmon run to begin with. But there are salmon.
One such fish brushes past my buddy's leg. Immediately he knees the fish like he is juggling a soccer ball and pops it out of the water, then slaps it out of the air on to the shore.
This is dumb luck. He could not do this again if he spent years training. Noodling (catching fish with your hands) is a thing that is legal to do with salmon but it is so much harder than literally every other way to catch salmon, including grabbing them with a garbage can. What he just managed is the kind of thing that should make you want to grab the fish and swing it around your head like a stripper with her panties off.
But,
He has an audience.
This is the opportunity offered by the universe.
He plays it cool.
He puts on dead pan straight face on and wades up to shore to grab his fish and nod to the tourists. Someone asks something and he assures them this is the standard way to get a quick dinner here. The tour guide has caught up with his group. He looks at my buddy and his fish and the general lack of fishing accoutrement. Without missing a beat, the guide backs up every ounce of bullshit out of my buddys mouth because if there is one true fraternity it is locals bullshitting stupid tourists.

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dramatic
i just had the funniest experience in vr chat, i joined a random server and the one i joined had Japanese people so i waddled around in my goofy club penguin avatar that i have saved, after a while a guy walks up to me and clones my avatar so were both penguins then another guy shows up and clone my avatar
now keep in mind there only speaking Japanese i don’t know what they are saying, then another guy joins in, so i got a group of three penguin friends
we just waddle around and goof about, the one of them tries to talk to me, but not only do i not have a mic i also don’t speak Japanese, they figure out i don’t speak Japanese and start listing various places, they get the part of being European right, and after listing a lot of places they ask if im from the UK and when i nod they all just start cheering. after hanging out for a while one of them gets real close to me and whispers…
“penguin brothers forever”
men annd women can do whatever they want
disagree
men and women cant do anything
disagree
youre making this so fucking difficult
An excuse to stay up to 3am in a math test night.
may your 2022 be vampiric and homoerotic

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do you think
they didn't even ban mpreg
hello and welcome to “is this word tumblr approved?” a post where i take it upon myself to find out if a word is still approved
NUT
status: approved
BALLSACK
status: approved
MILKERS
status: approved
MILF
status: banned
MILFY
status: approved
The Messiah

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Bimbldun xinflbaeth
My husband knew that my favorite meal was my mother’s breaded and panfried chicken breast, known in my family as “Becca Chicken”. He apparently got her to teach him to cook it for our first anniversary, and every now and then he will surprise me with it as dinner. He makes it even better than I can. love is a chicken cutlet indeed
get yourself a significant other who will make you perfectly breaded and fried chicken cutlets
love is a practice