does This to you bites bites bites

@theartofmadeline

shark vs the universe
Cosimo Galluzzi
Xuebing Du

JVL
cherry valley forever
KIROKAZE

pixel skylines
Jules of Nature
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
todays bird
Sade Olutola
Acquired Stardust
wallacepolsom

Product Placement

titsay

izzy's playlists!
Three Goblin Art
Misplaced Lens Cap

#extradirty
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@cookie-nom-nom
does This to you bites bites bites

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my first animation try!
Philza Vivisection
As per the Collected Covenant, Philza must submit to all experimentation. Upon non compliance, visitation to his children is prohibited.
and close ups!
Yeah. That man deffo isn’t planning to bite off heads.
and I’m STILL not allowed to rip open my chest wide enough I can actually breathe

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Skull of judgement should i get a buzzcut
CAN YOU GET A FULL SKIN REMOVAL TOO
Fun little drake/dragon piece I did! His name is Mandrake :) Really loved drawing the scales on this one!!
I miss you so much
😭
I still think it’s hilarious that the reason nobody ever figures out Superman’s secret identity or where he lives or what he does when he’s not saving the planet, is because he already told them all the Kryptonian stuff that can’t be tied to any of his human friends or family. I guarantee you the in-universe wikipedia article on Superman lists his name as Kal-El and the “personal life” section says that he lives full-time at his private fortress of solitude at the north pole. Nobody in the world looks at Clark Kent and thinks “oh my god, maybe he’s superman!” for the same reason nobody ever starts to suspect that their coworker who looks KINDA like Barack Obama is actually secretly Barack Obama – They know who Barack Obama is and know what he does and they know their coworker Greg is Greg and not Barack Obama. They have no reason to assume Barack Obama secretly moonlights as Greg The IT Guy at their workplace even though they’ve never seen Greg and Obama in the same place. At best, “Greg is secretly Obama” would be a running joke at the office, and the same is true at the Daily Planet. “Kal-El of Krypton, who lives in a CRYSTAL PALACE at the NORTH POLE and whose dayjob is SUPERMAN, sometimes puts on a suit and pretends to be a clumsy reporter and lives in a one-bedroom walkup in Metropolis” is a ridiculous concept to anyone who doesn’t already know it’s true
@unpretty
“Hey, that— that guy, in the corner, is that— is that Superman?”
Clark looks up from his computer at the new intern. “Oh, no,” he says. “You caught me.”
“Clark, you pull this shit every time, man,” his desk neighbor Steve says. “Shut the fuck up.”
“No, the kid’s right, I’m Superman,” Clark says. He gets out of his seat and cracks his back out. “I guess we’re gonna have a superhero fight.”
“Clark, sit back down.”
“Nope. Superhero fight.”
“Clark if you don’t sit the hell back down and finish your article by lunch I am going to tell Perry on you.”
Clark points at the intern. “You get off easy this time, buddy,” he says, and sits back down.
“So…” the intern says, very lost. “Uh…”
“That’s Clark,” a slightly older and more experienced intern says. “He’s Superman’s asshole twin.”
The funniest part is when Clark does this in front of Jimmy Olsen, who is just staring in disbelief as Clark talks about using his superpowers to help Ma Kent on the farm in a sarcastic tone of voice, when Jimmy knows for a fact it’s 100% true, that is what Clark did last weekend.
Intern: “Ahahahah Superman in Kansas tilling the fields at superspeed, that’s a good one. What, if the tractor breaks down, do you just pick it up and take it back to the barn?”
Clark: “Nah, between my ex-ray vision and my heat vision I can generally find whatever the problem is and do a spotweld if necessary so long as I know where to get the parts - once had to nip over to South Korea because I didn’t want to wait 6 weeks for the ship to get there.”
Intern: “Bahahaha classic, Clark you are so funny! Superman fixing tractors with his heat vision, oh that’s a good one.”
Jimmy: “…”
I love this post, because it’s so true.
I feel like the only thing that would trip me up about Clark is his hunkyness. Even if he downplays it as Clark. So to me, what i would add to stories about superman’s daily life is a serious gym hobby.
Sort of like Clark talking about going to the gym before work (yes he gets up at 5 am and does some weight training and a healthy breakfast and calls his parents), always having some bag with gym equipment with him, instead of the weather he discusses the best evidence for how many rest days and how many reps, etc etc.
So it’s kind of a “Hm? Oh yeah that’s Clark, yeah no he does look a lot like superman, haha. Yeah sure Clark, and Greg from IT is secretly Barack Obama. Now, come on new intern, don’t listen to him, I’ll show you your desk. What you need to know about Clark is that he’s a real softie, and also a wicked journalist. And what you will learn about him after you talk with him for three minutes tops is that he really likes going to the gym. Yeah he grew up on a farm helping his parents, and he says it reminds him of them. Would trip over thin air tho, seriously.”

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this Sunday is my cats 10th birthday (big deal for me personally) but I have to go to my brothers evil girlfriends apartment for some fuck all reason she is ruining my life
Eridians name thats just the weezer riff
Weezeridian...
New sleep style: hitting the snooze button so many times that you sleep two additional hours in ten minute intervals. I call this Horse Sleep
Worse sleep. That was meant to say worse sleep
I Am So Fucking Tired
Literally immediately after reblogging this to correct it I went "wow, it has a reblog already?" And got all the way to checking my notifs before I realized. That it was me.
I actually wasn't that far off you guys
HOLY SHIT THE POST IS SAVED
Anyway horse sleep: sleep, but horse. Worse. Sleep but worse. Definitely one of the two.
We shall have a summer wedding
the night mares will continue
Happy BotW 9th Anniversary! 🎉

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james ortiz provided some of his own personal rocky backstory on the sag aftra podcast, transcribed by me because we all have to be miserable about it together.
link to the podcast, this section below is from timestamp 24.35
“andy weir provided a packet to the creature shop that was like a packet of eridian biology and stuff but there wasn’t much about eridian culture or eridian sociology and i made a bunch of choices going in because i just needed to have like a ‘who am i?’ right?
[…] and i made a decision that rocky’s species, that eridians are really social animals that in fact are like a beehive or a pod of dolphins - it’s a unique and really integrated ecosystem of everybody doing their [specific] part. and the fact that rocky had to fly that ship for about 45 years - longer than grace has been alive, i wanna point that out - he’s been alone on that ship, having to run that by himself and- ryan and i would talk about that, one day we sat down and he was like “so what’s the movie from rocky’s perspective?” and i was like “oh it’s like ‘alien’, […] like he’s in a ‘contagion’ movie by himself and he has no idea what’s going on.”
he’s basically in castaway by himself which of course ryan is too but like, one reason why we never cut to the past of rocky is like, i think it was really horrifying! i don’t think rocky has slept in however many years and so a thing i was really struggling with is this idea of like “rocky must watch sleep” because how do you make that a need as opposed to like, a cute idea? and i just had to make the decision that […] he has a lot of unprocessed trauma around the things that he doesn’t understand and how much he is blaming himself because he’s the guy who fixes, he’s the guy who fixes and there was something really freeing about deciding that rocky was a deeply emotional, deeply anxious, deeply horrified person - being - that is trying to move through that in some way and how that affects the early scenes with him until there’s a point in the story where you can see we’ve physically softened rocky’s behaviour, because he’s finally feeling more safe and ok but all of that lore, all of that information [was essential].
i also decided, this is just a small nerdy thing, that there was actually some of his family, was on that ship too.”
I think that if you had enough daughters AND played your cards right you could spring Mambo Number Five out at the EXACT right gathering and shatter your entire family's trust forever
The secret is to name them out of order with the lyrics so by the time anyone catches on it's too late
For me personally the ideal gathering would be my funeral
Okay, let's do the math here, shall we?
On an average, assuming genetic invariability with reference to allosomes (which can be premediated via presence or lack of the Y Chromosomes which can be identified by a simple blood test, yadda yadda yadda), you're talking an average of 8 weeks for the pregnancy to be readable enough in re sex of the kid. (Assuming the kid is Cisgendered.) This is typically followed by 9 months of pregnancy (- the 8 weeks) and about 18 months of recommended recovery period after. This gives the conception and birth of each kid an average timeline of 27 months in all, which is about 2.25 years.
Now, in re Lou Bega's Mambo No. 5, there are a total of 9 individuals mentioned. Angela, Pamela, Sandra, Rita, Monica, Erica, Rita (repeated), Tina, Sandra (repeated), Mary, and Jessica. Assuming the existence of a singular Rita and Sandra which were called upon twice in the song, we can assume that this would involve a grand total of 2.25 x 9 = 20.5 years of near constant pregnancies to produce the offspring in question.
Assuming that the embryonic host typically hits Menopause at around 40, we can assume that the primary conception in re the same occurs at around 19.5 years of age. Which is still premature in re sociocultural aspects but the body is more than capable of handling such a strain at that age.
Also, in case we assume that every one of the offspring remain in all cases, cisgendered (which is a variable that is very hard to account for), we can assume that there is always a possibility that the allelomorph of the embryo involved can occasionally involve an XY chromosome. The detection can successfully occur at 8 weeks, and in case an abortion ensues, conception can recur within as little as 2 more weeks. That is an added extra 10 weeks per in re the nondesired sex.
In case of purely clinical states, such as IVF, where the Ova are extracted and externally fertilised each time, a system of Preimplantation Genetic Testing for Aneuploidies (PGT-A) can be incorporated in order to identify XX chromosomal situations and ensuring further that only those are implanted. This, while making sure that the offspring in question are necessarily of the XX karyotype, cannot of course state whether a state of monozygotic twinning can occur or not. More often than not, in order to maximise chances of implantation, more than two embryos used to be implanted into the uterus, typically around five. But technology has significantly improved in the years following which makes sure that there is no need for the same. Elective Single Embryo Transfer (eSET) is now the standard in modern IVF, prioritizing the transfer of one, high-quality, genetically tested blastocyst to achieve a healthy, single-baby pregnancy. This shift minimizes severe risks associated with multiple pregnancies, such as preterm birth for babies and severe complications for mothers, while maintaining high success rates. Clinics now reserve multiple embryo transfers primarily for older patients or those with histories of repeated IVF failures, rather than routine practice.
In case there are more than one embryos that get implanted that are undesirable, the extra embryos can be removed through a medical procedure called multifetal pregnancy reduction (MFPR) or selective reduction.
In summation, assuming of course that we are talking about the most clinically ideal circumstances, where there is the implantation of a single embryo each time, that still gives you about the same timeline of about 20.5 years. In case of preferring to determine sex after (which is cheaper) as opposed to before (which is still pricey as fuck in today's economy), that adds another 10 weeks per embryo. Unwanted implants can be removed via MFPR.
I forgot what my point here was. Anyway. Have fun if you're planning on that.
IVF'ing my nine daughters at once as a trans man to speedrun what the youths are calling "the Lou Bega challenge"