Nomathon in the flesh (do I have flesh?? Unconfirmed) @cookie-nom-nom - Tumblr Blog

five minute finger-on-my-phone doodle. i like them

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cloudabserk

i want to abuse my government expense account to buy grace candy

charlybvnny

singular grain of sand...

heartattackinblackdye

does This to you bites bites bites

wadaxi3u

my first animation try！

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nomsfaultau

Philza Vivisection

As per the Collected Covenant, Philza must submit to all experimentation. Upon non compliance, visitation to his children is prohibited.

and close ups!

Yeah. That man deffo isn’t planning to bite off heads.

and I’m STILL not allowed to rip open my chest wide enough I can actually breathe

#Too many LAYERS it’s CONTRICTING <- talking about my literal skin and muscles

lesslaivyy

vitchuatlocalhost-deactivated20

theskullofjudgement

Skull of judgement should i get a buzzcut

CAN YOU GET A FULL SKIN REMOVAL TOO

vroen-arts

Fun little drake/dragon piece I did! His name is Mandrake :) Really loved drawing the scales on this one!!

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bloizaaa

I miss you so much

😭

agfgoth3

raptorific

I still think it’s hilarious that the reason nobody ever figures out Superman’s secret identity or where he lives or what he does when he’s not saving the planet, is because he already told them all the Kryptonian stuff that can’t be tied to any of his human friends or family. I guarantee you the in-universe wikipedia article on Superman lists his name as Kal-El and the “personal life” section says that he lives full-time at his private fortress of solitude at the north pole. Nobody in the world looks at Clark Kent and thinks “oh my god, maybe he’s superman!” for the same reason nobody ever starts to suspect that their coworker who looks KINDA like Barack Obama is actually secretly Barack Obama – They know who Barack Obama is and know what he does and they know their coworker Greg is Greg and not Barack Obama. They have no reason to assume Barack Obama secretly moonlights as Greg The IT Guy at their workplace even though they’ve never seen Greg and Obama in the same place. At best, “Greg is secretly Obama” would be a running joke at the office, and the same is true at the Daily Planet. “Kal-El of Krypton, who lives in a CRYSTAL PALACE at the NORTH POLE and whose dayjob is SUPERMAN, sometimes puts on a suit and pretends to be a clumsy reporter and lives in a one-bedroom walkup in Metropolis” is a ridiculous concept to anyone who doesn’t already know it’s true

comedowntheroad-blog

@unpretty

roachpatrol

“Hey, that— that guy, in the corner, is that— is that Superman?”

Clark looks up from his computer at the new intern. “Oh, no,” he says. “You caught me.”

“Clark, you pull this shit every time, man,” his desk neighbor Steve says. “Shut the fuck up.”

“No, the kid’s right, I’m Superman,” Clark says. He gets out of his seat and cracks his back out. “I guess we’re gonna have a superhero fight.”

“Clark, sit back down.”

“Nope. Superhero fight.”

“Clark if you don’t sit the hell back down and finish your article by lunch I am going to tell Perry on you.”

Clark points at the intern. “You get off easy this time, buddy,” he says, and sits back down.

“So…” the intern says, very lost. “Uh…”

“That’s Clark,” a slightly older and more experienced intern says. “He’s Superman’s asshole twin.”

beka-tiddalik

The funniest part is when Clark does this in front of Jimmy Olsen, who is just staring in disbelief as Clark talks about using his superpowers to help Ma Kent on the farm in a sarcastic tone of voice, when Jimmy knows for a fact it’s 100% true, that is what Clark did last weekend.

Intern: “Ahahahah Superman in Kansas tilling the fields at superspeed, that’s a good one. What, if the tractor breaks down, do you just pick it up and take it back to the barn?”

Clark: “Nah, between my ex-ray vision and my heat vision I can generally find whatever the problem is and do a spotweld if necessary so long as I know where to get the parts - once had to nip over to South Korea because I didn’t want to wait 6 weeks for the ship to get there.”

Intern: “Bahahaha classic, Clark you are so funny! Superman fixing tractors with his heat vision, oh that’s a good one.”

Jimmy: “…”

myboyrozanovv

I love this post, because it’s so true.

I feel like the only thing that would trip me up about Clark is his hunkyness. Even if he downplays it as Clark. So to me, what i would add to stories about superman’s daily life is a serious gym hobby.

Sort of like Clark talking about going to the gym before work (yes he gets up at 5 am and does some weight training and a healthy breakfast and calls his parents), always having some bag with gym equipment with him, instead of the weather he discusses the best evidence for how many rest days and how many reps, etc etc.

So it’s kind of a “Hm? Oh yeah that’s Clark, yeah no he does look a lot like superman, haha. Yeah sure Clark, and Greg from IT is secretly Barack Obama. Now, come on new intern, don’t listen to him, I’ll show you your desk. What you need to know about Clark is that he’s a real softie, and also a wicked journalist. And what you will learn about him after you talk with him for three minutes tops is that he really likes going to the gym. Yeah he grew up on a farm helping his parents, and he says it reminds him of them. Would trip over thin air tho, seriously.”

mbmbimbo

this Sunday is my cats 10th birthday (big deal for me personally) but I have to go to my brothers evil girlfriends apartment for some fuck all reason she is ruining my life

#Honest to God reads like a classic post or the muppet joker

bigcheesevik

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charlybvnny

Eridians name thats just the weezer riff

Weezeridian...

caspercryptid

New sleep style: hitting the snooze button so many times that you sleep two additional hours in ten minute intervals. I call this Horse Sleep

caspercryptid

Worse sleep. That was meant to say worse sleep

caspercryptid

I Am So Fucking Tired

caspercryptid

Literally immediately after reblogging this to correct it I went "wow, it has a reblog already?" And got all the way to checking my notifs before I realized. That it was me.

caspercryptid

I actually wasn't that far off you guys

caspercryptid

HOLY SHIT THE POST IS SAVED

caspercryptid

Anyway horse sleep: sleep, but horse. Worse. Sleep but worse. Definitely one of the two.

caspercryptid

We shall have a summer wedding

earhartsease

the night mares will continue

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