This is my life.

The so-called “tampon tax” has got to go. That’s the message of lawmakers in both chambers of the state Legislature.

Democrats and a couple Republicans are teaming up to get rid of Michigan’s use tax and sales tax on feminine hygiene products.

Michigan exempts food, medication and other necessities from taxes, and lawmakers argue feminine hygiene products are just as essential.

Bill sponsor, Rep. Winnie Brinks, D-Grand Rapids, says, “It’s not optional. It’s certainly not a luxury item and you need it for 40 years, so it’s really unlike most other items that are taxed.”

LET ME TELL YOU GUYS A BIT ABOUT THESE AMAZING MUSICIANS

IF IT’S AN OLD THEATER, THE PIT SPACES ARE SO TINY AND ALL THESE MUSICIANS ARE CRAMMED TOGETHER. SOMETIMES THEY CAN’T EVEN SEE THE CONDUCTOR. IN THE NEWSIES PIT, IF YOU’RE SITTING IN THE REED 2 MUSICIAN’S SPOT, THERE IS A GIANT WALL HIDING THE CONDUCTOR FROM VIEW

SOOO… THEY USE MONITORS THAT SHOW THEM A LIVESTREAM OF THE CONDUCTOR, BUT THEY’RE OFTEN A SPLIT SECOND SLOW SO THESE MUSICIANS NEED TO FIGHT THEIR INSTINCTS AND COME IN A SPLIT SECOND EARLY

IT IS NEARLY IMPOSSIBLE TO GET A GIG AS A PIT MUSICIAN, BECAUSE THEY ALL SUB OUT TO EACH OTHER

THEREFORE THERE IS SO MUCH SELF-NETWORKING INVOLVED THAT IT GIVES ME ANXIETY JUST TO THINK ABOUT

SUBBING MUSICIANS DON’T GET REHEARSALS!!!!! EVER!!!!!!!!!!! MAYBE ONCE. BUT THE POINT IS THAT THEY NEED TO GO HOME AND PRACTICE TWO, MAYBE THREE BOOKS TO ABSOLUTE PERFECTION BECAUSE IF THEY DON’T PLAY UP TO PAR, THEY MAY NOT GET THAT JOB BACK.

THEY NEVER!!! GET!!!! ANY!!! RECOGNITION!!! I SENT THE NEWSIES PIT A LETTER ABOUT HOW MUCH THEY INSPIRED ME AND THEY WERE SO FLATTERED AND IMPRESSED AND GRATEFUL THAT THEY FUCKING LET ME SIT IN ON ONE OF THEIR LAST SHOWS.

THESE JOBS DO NOT PAY WELL, TO MY KNOWLEDGE. MAYBE THE SAME PAY AS A MUSIC TEACHER’S SALARY, IF THEY HAVE A STEADY GIG, WHICH MOST OF THEM DON’T.

IF THE SHOW CLOSES, THEY NEED TO FIND ANOTHER GIG, ASAP, BECAUSE THEIR PAY ISN’T ENOUGH TO SUSTAIN AN UNEMPLOYED PERSON AND THEIR FAMILY FOR A LONG PERIOD OF TIME.

OH YEAH, AND LUCKY BRASS PLAYERS, YOU ONLY NEED TO BE ABLE TO PLAY ONE INSTRUMENT, TWO AT THE MOST.

BUT THE WOODWIND PLAYERS? LET ME GIVE YOU SOME PERSPECTIVE:

THE REED 2 BOOK AT NEWSIES CONSISTED OF (I THINK) FLUTE, CLARINET, BASS CLARINET, ALTO SAX, BARI SAX, AND…. MAYBE PICCOLO? I FORGET. BUT THE POINT IS, WOODWIND MUSICIANS NEED TO BE ABLE TO MASTER 84379528803436 DIFFERENT INSTRUMENTS.