you're gonna hear me roar

“Thank yoy. Im sorry I didnt catch your name.”

“Why is that?”

“Because I’m Mexican and I like my food and I’ll outgrow a bikini before I get to summer if I get it too soon.”

“Thank you…that really means a lot to me.” 

“I thought the same thing. Thanks. I know I am. I can’t wait to call her my wife.”

“I’m sure she feels the same way. You got everything planned yet?”

“You could always come work out with me like we did in high school.”

“Yeah. But I’m lazy.”

“Well it’s just fairly obvious cause I can count who I had xonversations with on one hand.”

“We are getting married so I really hope we do.”

“Badass Corini’s settling down? Damn. Hell must have frozen over. All jokes aside, congratulations. You guys must be excited.”

“That may defeat the purpose of the SlimFast drink.”

“Hush, I’m trying to sound like I’m healthy.”

“I drink them when I work out but i’m still not a big fan. They are barely drinkable.”

“You know what’s really good? You know the SlimFast drinks? Make those into a milkshake with ice cream and ice and your mind will be blown.”

“It’s my specialty.”

“You and Melissa must get along pretty well then.”

“Well it sucks because he’s a sweetheart and didn’t get out much when we were growing up so he doesn’t even realize he’s the preferred twin.  But I see it.  I see how everyone loves him cause he’s sweet and innocent.  Hardly anyone talks to me.  In fact I could probably count the amount of people I’ve had conversations with on one hand.  I would have too, but I can only imagine it was a lot of shrill screaming.”

“It’s pretty bullshit when there’s a ‘preferred’ siblings. I mean, I prefer my sister over myself, but I think we’re pretty much tied in likeness with people. She’s definitely nicer, but I’ve never felt like anyone prefers her over me. I don’t really pay attention to that stuff though, so I wouldn’t notice anyways.”

“Thanks, I mean it’s not uncommon people prefer him over me.  However, that one was just uncalled for.  Nah, but when she wasn’t looking I turned her purse into a giant cup of coffee and energy drinks.  Much more satisfying when she opens it later even if I’m not around to see it.”

“I hate it when people prefer one over the other. Like, if I make new friends and someone’s like ‘I don’t like your sister’ I’m just like ‘nah, get out, we’re a packaged deal’ because my sister is my ultimate best friend. That’s great though, god I wish I could’ve seen the look on her face.”

“Free time is good when you aren’t thinking about stupid stuff while you have it.”

“Are you always such a downer?”

“At least not in a yummy way.”

“The chocolate ones aren’t too bad. But seriously, protein shakes are no bueno.”