wherever you go, go with all your heart

Holy long time no type. 

The last time I wrote, it was about two months after my dad went to be with Jesus. I was going through so many confused emotions that comes with grieving but also being so madly in love in the beginning of our relationship with Chris. At the time, Chris was just my amazing boyfriend who was there for me through the thick and thin. Now, he’s my husband and we are celebrating our one year anniversary in two days. Wowza.

Life is wild, y’all and God is so, so, so, soooo incredibly good. I know I’m not perfect and boy do I need Jesus, but I’m glad that I have Him in my life. The other night, Chris and I took turns praying for each other before bed... And when Chris started praying over me with his hands on my back, an overwhelming wave of love, gratitude, and God’s presence intensely consumed me. I started uncontrollably ugly crying. Chris was probably low-key freaking out but all he did was just hold me and kept on praying. That’s love y’all. That’s God’s work man. I thank God every morning that we have another day together and for blessing me with Chris to be my husband. I’ve been a “Christian” for as long as I can remember but I think I am truly in God’s presence now. I see and feel myself changing in God’s love, grace, and mercy. I wish I can shout from the mountains and tell people about this incredible feeling and happiness that I have witnessed and experienced but I’m not confident yet.. But I know God will train me and make me stronger so that one day, I can share His unconditional love with others. 

Anyways, so as most of y’all may know, the beginning of 2018 was literally the worst. BUT, 2018 was also so awesome at the same time. God may have taken our dad because He had bigger plans for him up in Heaven, but he also gave us Chris. Chris and I got engaged and then got married in 2019. In 2019, we got married, I moved to Toronto, Sunjun graduated from UGA and got a job at NCR, I started C & C Education, Chris started a new career, Julie kicked butt at her job (per usual), mom started finding her own independence... 2019 was good. There are so many things to be thankful for and when I reflect back on all the ups and down of 2019, I can’t help but to be thankful for every single event. Without every obstacle, we wouldn’t be who we are today. 

So far, 2020 is pretty exciting. We got to go home for a week for my dad’s 2nd anniversary of his passing. His first anniversary was TOUGH. Oh boy, I was struggling hard. (Thank you MJ and Chris for being there for our family) But we got through it. Since the first year was so tough, I was honestly dreading the second anniversary.. But surprisingly, I was at peace. Of course I miss my dad with all my heart and still shed lots of tears when I think about him, but my heart is comforted and at peace with my dad’s passing. That’s something I am so grateful for. Every year, I am in awe and am soooooooooo tremendously proud of my dad. He truly left his mark on this Earth and his positive, impactful, kind, genuine, wholesome presence still lingers. I am so proud to be his daughter. 

We celebrated my 29th (yikes) birthday in downtown Toronto and Chris surprised me with the most amazing dinner of my life. (Sorry I was hangry). We celebrated our first Valentine’s Day as a married couple at my favorite restaurant, Katsuya. Oh, we posted our first youtube video. Hahahahaha. This weekend, we leave for Montreal! Chris planned everything, all I did was look on Instagram at Montreal Foodies and I got stressed because there are so many good places to eat there. Hahah. But yeah, that’s me so far. 

I am indescribably happy. I am so in love with my husband and it’s crazy how obsessed I am with him.. Hahahah. I’m probably so annoying but he takes it all in. (Love ya babe!) I thought I loved him when we met, I thought I loved him when we got engaged, I thought I loved him when we got married.. But NOOOPPEE. Each day, my love for Chris gets stronger and wider. Cheesy and cringe, I know. But it’s the truth!! We talk about how much more we love each other today than we did yesterday all the time. Hahahah. We are so cringe. 

I think a big chunk of my happiness is all thanks to Jesus. I am so happy these days spiritually. I am hungry for him and I love being fed daily. My soul literally sings for him and to have a partner who is on the same page as you, is something to be really grateful for. 

Basically, Chris is DA BOMB, the goodness of God consumes me, my heart is filled with more love than before (not just for Chris but for others too). 

That’s it for now. Oh, tomorrow we are posting our second youtube video. Puhahahahhaha. 

So I moved back to Atlanta roughly two months ago; unexpectedly. I moved back under circumstances that no one wants to be in but everything happens for a reason. I moved back and my wonderful rock of a boyfriend, Chris, came to visit for a week and it was the happiest I’ve been since dad. 

We are a new couple and I truly believe that God placed us together. Chris came into my life at the perfect time and has been my #1 supporter, best friend, listener, cheerleader, foodie partner, everything partner ever since. Right when we started dating, my dad passed away pretty traumatically and I don’t think most guys would have stuck around for that. It was some heavy stuff and he didn’t even second guess our relationship or anything. He stuck by my side through it all. He commuted 40-50 minutes back and forth to be with me. He did and still does unimaginably romantic and thoughtless things for me. This is the first time in my life where I’m like.. ‘Wow. Now THIS is how it’s suppose to feel.’ 

So our love story.. Puhahahahah cringe. Hahahahh. He lives in Toronto and was visiting his parents in South Korea. While he was visiting his family, we happened to cross paths and it’s been the most wonderful few months since. Our probability of us meeting was 0. And when we first started dating, we both had walls up because neither of us wanted to do a long distance relationship. At this time, I was still planning on staying in Korea and he would go back to Canada in three weeks. The time difference, not knowing when we would see each other again, all that mess was definitely a hinderance.