Still here

See, they were living in a house and had chickens in the backyard. The original chickens were called Salad, Parm, and Caesar which we can all agree is very funny. They were later joined by Tesla, Spirit, and Cecil who didn’t fit the theme but we’ll forgive them.

The owners didn’t clip the wings so the chickens were really just pets that flew the fence sometimes but largely respected their backyard borders. One of the chickens however was notorious for breaking containment. The jury is out on whether it was Tesla or Spirit but we’ll say Tesla as that was my recollection.

So one morning after I had slept over I was dressed in my nice work clothes, button up, vest, etc. ready to leave for work.

I kissed my beloved goodbye and walked to my car when I spotted the chicken in the front yard. I went back and tapped on the door. My beloved opened it back up and I reported, “One of the chickens is out.”

My beloved was getting ready for their day too and their face fell. “I don’t have time for this.”

“Oh? Well that’s fine, come here real quick.”

I scoped out the yard and pointed where I’d like them to stand then stalked toward the chicken. The hen turned her head warily and started to move away from me but then saw my beloved in her escape path. She decided to make a last ditch effort for freedom and bolted, trying to make a break under my legs.

I casually scooped a hand under her, slinging her upside down and holding her by her feet so she was forced to go passive in my grip. Holding birds upside down is like a cheat code to put them in a trance. I’ve learned since this can be risky as the blood rush can harm them in rare cases but holding chickens by their feet was like my entire childhood so apologies to all those past birds but we didn’t have any resulting injuries.

I looked back at my beloved, dressed in my business casual work clothes with a chicken dangling incongruously from my hand and said, “Not too bad, she just goes in the backyard, yeah?”

My beloved nodded. I casually tossed the hen over the fence and she flapped down to land amidst the rest of the flock with a disgruntled cackling sound.

I turned back for one last kiss and found my beloved starry eyed. “That was so hot.”

“It was!?”

“Yeah! You knew exactly what you were doing and you were so smooth! You made that look so easy and it would have taken me forever.”

One would think that hearing a very distinct, clearly audible, reasonably loud and rapidly approaching sound of any kind would make any reasonable mammal turn to look at the direction of the sound, just purely by instinct?? If a deer heard something nearby go DING DING DING DING DING DING at its general direction, it would at least look up to see whether the source of the sound is a threat or not? Just a quick "is that something I need to be concerned about?" type of glance.

New Hunter The Parenting, and more Blair :D

Getting me out of an art slump.

He’s incredibly weak of character. He failed at everything he ever set out to do due to it, because he couldn’t actually like, lock in.

Helping his legion? They still kill serfs and slaves in terrible blood sacrifices that he tacitly allows because he’s too weak to stop them just before the heresy (Sanguinius: the Great Angel).

Protecting the people of Baal? They’re slaves and their culture squashed (Echoes of Eternity).

Killing Horus? Didn’t even like, achieve anything. Like legit, he rushed at Horus and was immediately killed. Caecaltus Dusk, Leetu and Ollanius Pius did more to defeat Horus (The End and the Death III).

His legionnaires keep secrets from him because they think he’s too fragile to handle them (Fear to Tread), secrets that everyone knows the Wolf King would demand a weregild for.

He leaves most of the actual leading of the legion to Raldoron (Fear to Tread) and is so stuck in his own head he’d rather allow genocide of his brother’s people than actually make a decision (Angels of Caliban).

He’s a terrible CO unable to actually make calls except when he’s angry, and then his calls are terrible (hurting and threatening to kill Nassir Amit for saying self evident stuff (Fear to Tread), and, again, rushing Horus like an absolute idiot).

My stepmother did NOT like the way her Libertarian Viking Neighbor framed pregnancy as the fetus "attacking the woman". She incredulously told him this was extremely disrespectful to expectant mothers to portray pregnancy as so violent and negative.

Libertarian Viking Neighbor's response was that people consensually hurt each other all the time, and "there's like a whole community about that, with the acronym the one that starts with a B" And his reasoning was that if the mother was consenting to bring attacked by the baby, it in fact wasn't violent and negative because there was consent.

One would think that hearing a very distinct, clearly audible, reasonably loud and rapidly approaching sound of any kind would make any reasonable mammal turn to look at the direction of the sound, just purely by instinct?? If a deer heard something nearby go DING DING DING DING DING DING at its general direction, it would at least look up to see whether the source of the sound is a threat or not? Just a quick "is that something I need to be concerned about?" type of glance.