Perpetually asleep

a man with a helmet or mask that he never takes off is infinitely more sexy than an attractive man who sometimes wears a helmet. it’s about the mystery. the mystique. is there nothing under there or a monster under there or a scary looking guy (all three uniquely charming). you’ll never know. it’s also doubly attractive if he takes his shirt off but keeps the helmet on. you agree

Men I trust more like men I thrust! #pegging

Why

forget everything anyone has ever told you on the matter the truest marker of adulthood is starting to hear the siren call of high quality kitchenware

to be clear you SHOULD buy that cast iron pan and you SHOULD buy that knife set and you SHOULD buy that fancy rice cooker and you SHOULD buy that novelty mug. high quality kitchenware is always worth it you’re literally gonna be using that almost every day

*in a fake body cast, interrupting your conversation* i just think its cruel how not one of you has mentioned my… condition.

After bitting a Fae, the Vampire claims that she must serve him, for his bite converted her into his thrall. The Fae claims that the Vampire must serve her, for the vampire ate fae food without her permission. As none of them is willing to give up, they bring the case to you, a lawyer.