As I was driving home today, musing on about the true fact that daniel was made for captivity, I asked myself whether max verstappen would do well in captivity. On one hand I think he likes structure and defined expectations very much, on the other he isn't super duper gracious about failing and certain opinions of certain people. And I think he would bite a dick off if the mood struck him.
So now i'd like to ask you for your complete (or incomplete) captivity suitability ranking of all drivers. But especially max.
this is such a spectacular question. okay so my starting thesis is that all f1 drivers would thrive as sex slaves because that's effectively their lives right now. they're willing to do difficult, uncomfortable, intense things with their body. obey rules and perform on command. allow intense scrutiny of their physical form and actions.
so i think the question is under what type of captivity would they be most likely to thrive.
max: would need to agree with the rules. i think he'd do well somewhere that he's sort of like a pampered pet, like he's allowed to be difficult in the way that beloved pets are allowed to be difficult, but there is a narrow sphere where max is extremely obedient and does all sorts of filthy things. it would be easy to get into a power struggle with him where if he thinks a rule is stupid he's going to fight it until the end of time, so probably best if he's got a partner sex slave (cough daniel) because then max is absolved of the responsibility of deciding whether or not he agrees with the rule. other guy is going along with it and so it's much easier for max to join in as well. i think it would also work if it was set up to allow for friction - like max is forced into doing something whilst resisting, but the difference between being made to do something and being punished. like a beloved housepet, max would never learn anything from punishments. he will never agree to a rule he thinks is stupid, but he can be forced into temporary compliance.
carlos: unlike with max, carlos doesn't need to agree with the rules. he just needs to accept that those ARE the rules. so if the rule is everyone has to have their sash tied with this specific knot and the top fabric should be three inches longer than the bottom fabric and that is how it has to be, carlos is going to be out there with the most correctly tied sash you've ever seen. he'd do the best in a house with other sex slaves where he gets to enforce the rules. like in the dallas cowboy cheerleaders, he needs to be one of the group leads. he needs to be allowed to tell people that their sash is not correctly tied. his goal is to most fully and correctly obey the rules and be acknowledged as the Most Correct.
george: also like high protocol high structure lots of rules but unlike carlos, george is misbehaving. he knows what the rules are, but he still does stuff that's so fucking weird it invites punishment, because he wants it to be his choice when he gets punished. he needs the freedom to dictate some of the structure, but like super highly structured and not actually "freedom". he really really really thinks it's unfair if someone else decides he should be punished in ways he hasn't personally conceived of.
charles: george is the opposite of charles, who would do best if he got to lash out, be punished (someone else's choice), and then repent. like, oh, sorry, i was wrong actually. the problem was that water is wet, you're right. i shouldn't have said that. <- is absolutely going to say it again. but he needs to be able to get his energy out! he couldn't be somewhere so restrictive that there wasn't room to cause a ruckus. the punishments aren't to change his behaviour, they're just part of the whole dynamic.
liam: may currently be a sex slave irl?????? what is happening with him and admin? every day it feels less like a joke. liam would do best if he were allowed to lash out and misbehave and be very bad but then have the opportunity to make amends. a begrudging good boy. it has to be difficult for him to get there, but that's where he ends up.
oscar: compliance without enjoyment. unlike carlos, oscar doesn't get any pleasure out of correctly following the rules. like max he's really obvious in his disagreement of their premise. but he doesn't resist. he just goes along with it long-sufferingly. the tough thing with that is that there's no inherent set up for catharsis, like he hate something and does it anyway, and he doesn't do it well enough to hit good boy status, but he doesn't do it badly enough to get punished. he's very withholding about the things he actually likes so it's easy to imagine the worst case scenarios where he's in captivity and it's all bad. but then also imagine the best case where he's somewhere that they figure out what button to push on to actually make him happy. and then push it only very very rarely.
