Welcome to the RP experience

1. “Ah, locked I see. Excellent. Just testing your security.”

2. “I’ll take this dark and dreary path off to the side and see where that takes me. Probably to a world of success and not death.” 

3. “I still don’t know what I’m looking at. Is that a pair of pants or is that a dead body?”

4. “I should probably go home at this point. When I see a Christmas wreath made of cow legs, I probably don’t want to be around here for too much longer.”

5. “Oh yeah. Oh, that’s a good sign. In my _______ experience, when things are covered in strange black substances, it’s usually the best thing that could happen.” 

6. “Is this still disgusting and horrifying? Yep. Just the same as it was before.”  

7. “That definitely sounds like the sounds of someone living here, so maybe I should get the fuck out.” 

8. “Why do people live here? Why does anyone live here? Why would anyone live here?” 

9. “Oh god damn it, I didn’t look at the god-damned tape!” 

10. “I’m in a world of hurt, aren’t I?” 

11. “Oh, I’m in a lot of trouble. ‘Cause last time I was down here there was a dead body.” 

12. “Well, there’s the dead body from before!” 

13. “Maybe I should crouch. I like crouching. Crouching makes me feel safe.” 

14. “You think? You’ve been here for ____ years and you only think it’s this way?” 

15. “What’s with the piles of meat?” 

16. “Oh. All right then. You take a nap, I guess.” 

17. “Oh, yeah. Yeah. It was a bad idea. I definitely confirm now that this was indeed a bad idea.”

18. “Why is it starting to rain? It wasn’t raining when I got here. Wasn’t even night when I got here. What the fuck is going on? It wasn’t even dusk or anything!”  

19. “Let me just try and dial 911…. Yep, that ain’t working.”

20. “I’m not home! I’M NOT HOME!” 

21. “I’m a brave _____! I’m gonna go down those stairs! I’m a brave _____!”

22. “Why am I not more panicked about this? I got stabbed through the shoulder, and stabbed through my fucking hand!” 

23. “100% back to normal. Thanks, ______. I don’t even have a grudge.” 

24. “I was gonna run for it! I didn’t want to be a part of this! I wanted to get the fuck out!  

25. “Yep, that’s no good. But it’s exactly as I remember.” 

26. “I don’t trust you! I see that knife!” 

27. “What the fuck? I just lost my arm! No goop juice is gonna fix this!” 

28. “Oh good, a gun. That would have been helpful.” 

29. “There was just one of you! I swear there was just one of you! But now there’s two! I know how to count to two!” 

30. “Wait, why do I have a hand? It’s not an unfair question for me to ask, why I have a hand, when I clearly saw it being cut off.” 

31. “I don’t want to do this! I don’t want to do this! I’d rather not do this!” 

32. “Well, we know what happened to them. I’m pretty sure they all died.” 

33. “Oh good, more handgun ammo. Do I have a handgun? No, I do not.”

34. “Oh, _______, you’re alive. Or whatever you can assume being alive is in this fucked up world.” 

35. “All right, fine then. You give up quite easily.” 

36. “At least I have a flashlight, somehow. Don’t ask me how, cause I have no idea.”

37. “I found your mower! _____, I found your mower!” 

You can stop screaming

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