that which is called "ego death"

happy decade to the horrible beast i have wrought

i think i’m not much of a hater as i am a dismayer. my gut reaction when disappointed isn’t always “oh what the fuck this SUCKS” but without fail it’s “oh why did they do that this concept could have been so GOOD”

when an already injured character gets tossed like a ragdoll into their buddy by some violent force/explosion/magic/collision (pick your poison) and they both go down hard. the shredded and bruised elbows and knees don’t matter, nothing else matters because they have their friend back… except their friend hasn’t moved or talked or made a sound, limp in their arms. so they roll them over in their lap and sure enough they’re passed the fuck out. hey. no, no, no, no. the pleading spills out of them as their hands scurry over the slack planes of their friend’s face, but no matter how much they shake them, or call their name, they remain ashen and bloody, their breathing shaky and stuttering, there but barely, dead to the world for now. stay with me. they pull them close. please stay with me.

atheists call it project hail darwin

agnostics call it project hail maybe

“if you love this character then you must make him happy in your fics, right?” wrong. the horror. suffering. internal hemorrhage. hospital. immediately

Must not pick that scab off. It will not in fact get rid of the scab and just create a different scab. The scab is not done cooking yet. I am completely normal about scabs. <-gripping the edges of his chair so tightly the wood is starting to crack

*thinks about OCs* *Thinks about OCs* *thinks about OCs* *thinks About OCs* *thinks about OCs* *Thinks About OCs* *thinks about OCs* *THINKS ABOUT OCS* *thinks about OCs* *thinks about OCS* *thinks about OCs* *THINKS about OCs* *thinks about OCs* *thinks ABOUT OCs* *thinks about OCs* *thinks about OCs* *Thinks about OCs* *thinks about OCs* *thinks About OCs* *thinks about OCs* *Thinks About OCs* *thinks about OCs* *THINKS ABOUT OCS* *thinks about OCs* *thinks about OCS* *thinks about OCs* *THINKS about OCs* *thinks about OCs* *thinks ABOUT OCs* *thinks about OCs*