twig arm twilight ass bitch

like what if i go to the kitchen at night to get some water and an underwater cave system is there

penny is such a good name. hello my name is dollar bill

i hear there are several types of ways to feel

I met every single creepy pasta and they wre all nice to me

i got that dog in me but it's poorly socialized and i don't take it on as many walks as i should

hate when I type :) and this 🙂 fucker appears. Go away you evil soul

“scientists don’t want you know” is a phrase that always cracks me up because if you actually meet a scientist they will be shaking and crying like an overstimulated chihuahua with the need to let you know

if you vote me for president i vow to make everything the ocean again. no more land only ocean. this will solve all of our problems and replace them with new, far more interesting problems

i don't know who needs to hear this, but guilt, self-hatred and shame are not sustainable sources of growth and healing. you can't hate yourself into feeling better, or being better. you can't repeatedly punish yourself for your flawed humanity and expect wholesome results.

dry humping? what's that wet spot on your underwear then

being a kid and hearing adults say stuff like "woah 2011 was 4 years ago haha" didn't really convey the fucking horror of a youtube video crossing my recommended labelled "9 years ago" and it's from 2017. that's not true. 9 years ago is 2010 or something. don't lie.

sorry to be a broken record every month but christ menstruation is a stupid concept. oooooh excuse me for not getting pregnant, why the fuck is there goo falling out of me about it? grow the fuck up and reabsorb that shit for nutrients.

severely deficient in whatever vitamin makes u a person