meowta

invented a new word today. its 'plagiarism'. im a genius i know

elvis died because it wasnt getting enough fiber

ive never fucked up someones pronouns this badly before, sorry

stop drinking beer with the deer and come have a cider with the spiderrrr

How is it that you can a music library of like 1,200+ absolute bangers but as soon as you put it on shuffle in a group setting it's like. anime opening you added in 2010. homestuck parody song. musical artist who was cancelled last year for kidnapping and eating children in his basement. Hamilton

much like a beautiful horse i like salt and roaming freely

much like a beautiful horse i like salt and roaming freely

(To the tune of Rasputin): BLEH BLEH DRACULA, KING OF TRANSYLVANIA, HE IS A BAT AND ALSO A MAN

love island should introduce a "scheming eunuch" islander who is like a smart and completely asexual islander exempt from being kicked off or being made to participate in any challenges and they're just there to provide advice and be a sort of sounding board for the other islanders when they need a disinterested party to talk things through with. but the scheming eunuch has secret goals unbeknownst to anyone e.g. a cash prize for talking a certain couple into breaking up etc.

This would make me watch love island i think

literally drinking a beer by the lake and still opened tumblr. some of us are beyond saving

man if you're disabled you've GOT to find some way to make your fuckass body a source of pleasure whenever you can. jacking off. eating good food. wearing soft clothes. kissing an animal on the head. whatever you can do

i think the elon musk nazi salute thing will always be this little "2020s in a nutshell" moment for me. the adl taking the time off their busy schedule of noting every instance of someone saying "free palestine" as an antisemitic hatecrime to swoop in and reassure everyone that was definitely not a nazi salute as mr "judeobolshevik shadow elites are transing our children to advance white genocide? interesting. looking into it" would never

We should popularize more hispanized phonetic spellings of classic character names like we did with esnupi

partially-managed mental illness is so fucking funny i'll be sitting around doing my job and suddenly think "wow i hate myself" and immediately get confused because, like, that's not TRUE! i love myself so much. who are you to talk to me like that