i can’t believe we’re all young professionals and academics and we’re still logging on to tumblr.com every single day to clown on ourselves. who let this happen

Look man this is the only place left im allowed to say clown shit without it impacting my career, just lemme have this

@gymnasiumexcess

was just Remembering how you’d be out with a friend and you’d each order a different cocktail and you’d ask “what’d you get?” and they’d read the description off the menu and you’d be like “ooh that sounds good” and then they’d say “try it!” and then you’d have a lil sip of their drink and they’d have a lil sip of your drink and you’d decide which one was best and you wouldn’t give each other a life-threatening respiratory infection

REMEMBER: THE INTERNET DRAINS YOUR SPIRITUAL ENERGY AND THE ONLY THING THAT CAN REPLENISH IT IS GAS STATION DICK PILLS AND CAPRI SUN

this, THIS is the 2021 mood

I just spit up water all over myself bitch

When he grabbed the countertop I screamed

I’ve said it before but “ the disrespect was so potent, I have a vision” is a permanent part of my vocabulary