welcome to your new home, freak

all of their entries on the Bratz wiki (wikiz?) are so funny because they're like. they're characters that are designed to be interesting for young girls who like playing dress up with dolls but they're also supposed to represent the abstract concept of a Teenage Boy, whatever the hell that is, so all of their personalities are like "loves to flaunt the coolest clothes and flashiest shoes! has a huge collection of belts, gloves, and hats that he takes great pride in! also enjoys uuuuh monster trucks and death metal"

jughead

rhaenyra’s harem being her literal uncle, her uncles ex lover, and her stepmother is INSANE. only in the targaryens truly

rhaenyra spent 1 day in the alicent hightower simulator and lost her fucking marbles 😔

First day on the job and I’m getting my long awaited vengeance against my father’s evil vizier but it turns out no one else knows how to do his job so I need to at least hire an accountant because I’m too rich to understand the concept of a budget, but we scared off the city’s comptroller who hid all our liquid assets and told only the master of laws, who we beheaded without checking on that and a rat crawls up my pant leg. So I try to at least call over some pest control but my stupid chud brother already killed all of them because they killed his son because our other brother killed MY son. So now we’re overrun by rats and I pivot to taking some petitions and this lady that looks strangely like my siblings’ mom (why?) tells me we’re out of food because of the blockade I put in place. So I ask my husband’s ex, who is on my cabinet because I’m kind of fucking her because of my complex about not being my father’s son, and she asks what my dad would do. So I do what my dad would do and ask a sad woman I’ve locked in my house, but she’s mad at me because I killed her dad. So I try to handle both the rat and the budget problem by making my entire merchant class eat the rats and sending my corrupt police force to rob their houses and now all my merchants are both pissed off and absolutely going to tell everyone the blockade was my fault. So I ask MY evil vizier what I should do but he’s mad at me because I won’t legitimize his peasant sons, one of which has one of my nukes and I just publicly humiliated twice. So I leave to consider if I should kill my littlest brother to relieve some stress, except another one of my fathers’ evil viziers’ evil fruit relatives tricked me and this isn’t any of my brothers. So I walk away with no one for protection except the chief of the aforementioned police force who I just encouraged to seize the property of nobles and we get stopped by one of my other nuke holding peasants who asks why he hasn’t gotten a paycheck in 4 months, and I tell him I’m broke as shit in front of the aforementioned corrupt police chief, who is also on the payroll that I don’t have. So I give up and circle back to my vice president and he thinks for a few minutes and then asks if I’ve tried bombing Iran

maybe this is too woke but i really hate the trope of naked older women = scary or vomit inducing or gross or whatever. like you even see it used in horror on occasion like oooooo so scary theres a woman with saggy boobs and wrinkles. There is something to be said for unconsensual veiwing of nudity. sure. it’s uncomfortable and violating for someone to be nude in front of you that you don’t want to see. but rarely that’s seen as the issue and instead the real ‘horror’ or gross out joke is the very idea of a woman who does not have a body that is sexually desirable to men. The very idea of an older woman’s body is treated like it’s something that we should all know is gross, sick and wrong. It’s just something that really bothers me

Always thinking about that post that’s like you know a shows fucked when people can name individual writers.

She was trying to look behind the counter where we keep Gold Jewelry and Gucci Purses for pokemon cards

Pivotal information I think everyone should know: this was at a thrift store

I'm probably a trans man but my loser husband locked me in a cage with a chimpanzee and then ran off to take over John Malkovich's body so he could launch his puppetry career, and then I met a group of old people who were also trying to take over John Malkovich's body to attain immortality, and then I kidnapped our third only to discover that I got her pregnant that one time we fucked while I was in John Malkovich's body. So idrc about that rn.