languish, lament, lie down

costco should sell weed i want to smoke kirkland signature strain

(to the tune of working on the railroad) iiive been working on the railrooad

does anybody know how to get out of bed. or be a better person

printers behave like that because the medieval monks they put out of work are haunting them

[louder than everyone] MAN I THINK IT DEPENDS!

The decemberists if they were communist: my girl, lenin in curls

am I unforgivable or is it just wednesday

I just love it when things are earnest like everyone get more earnest now

god I'm such a slut for Chinese eggplant in garlic sauce *decides it’s inaccurate to refer to myself as a slut in light of my minimal sexual activity* if The Enemy discovered my ardor for Chinese eggplant in garlic sauce, they would gain a significant strategic advantage

such insolence... guards? seize her! ...no. stop. not like that. you are doing it gay. why are you seizing her gay style

you can stay indoors all day when the sun is out, and sometimes it's nice like a cool draught from a tranquil spring, but watch out because if you stay indoors for two days in a row while the sun is out you start doing odd gothic literature things, stalking the halls and passages and muttering to yourself and parting the blinds to gaze down at your neighbours with a haunted look before turning away to contemplate your mannequins #yourmannequins. three days and you're basically fucked. you have to throw a towel over your head to scurry as far as the store for milk and people jeer at you like frankenstein's monster.

the sewing machine is like if a horse and an inkjet printer had a child

puts my uncomfortably wet hand on your shoulder. see here, gay boy- can i call you gay boy?