I cannot stress the importance of taking a dudes treatment of you for what he really feels!!!!!! If he’s treating you badly, don’t make up excuses for him. Listen to your friends. Don’t try to create a personality he doesn’t have and convince yourself that one day everything will drastically change. Don’t use those small moments that he is remotely nice to you as a sign that things will get better/things are fine. If he is not nice to you, if he ignores you and takes you for granted, if you are putting in huge amounts of emotional labour and he is not returning the favour- leave him. A guy opening up to you and telling you all his issues is not a sign that he is in love with you. Somebody asking you for advice constantly and opening up to you doesn’t mean they care about you. Performing emotional labour for somebody doesn’t mean that you’re in love, it means you are the one investing all your time and emotional energy into them. That’s it. Take a person’s actions for what they are- the way they feel about you. People can go on and on about how much they care about you but still treat you like crap. You deserve better. You deserve more. Accept that. Let yourself let go, move on from relationships that are one-sided in effort. Move on from relationships that drain you. Move on from people that use you and take advantage of you.

I’d also like to add that abusers use this technique of telling you about their feelings and their past and whatever makes them look like a victim so that you’ll try to save them and you’ll end up trapped in an abusive relationship but you won’t think of this as abusive you’ll just think he trusts you enough to share things from his past with you when in fact he just does this to make you fall right into his trap

Standing up to someone who’s manipulative is the hardest thing to do because you often end up in a situation where you have to “prove” to this person that they’re being manipulative, and of course if it’s just you against them, they’ll deny everything and might even be able to turn things around and make you believe you’re actually the manipulative one and this is so fucking toxic and it’s the reason why I stayed with my ex for so long because I just thought it was my fault, and honestly I’m still enraged by the fact that humans can be that shitty

Can we talk about  how the idea that "you'll never really heal unless you forgive them" is just another form of victim blaming?

Not sure why I’m always seeing beautiful intelligent funny girls broken down by dusty crusty boring cockroach looking men but it needs to stop

During the “infatuation period”, which is that period of time usually lasting a few weeks to a few months, a man will show you “his representative”. This is the person that he wants you to think of him as. He’ll tell you everything you want to hear, and he’ll try to butter you up to get you to like him more and more. You can’t believe this person. Challenge a man, ask him questions, ask his intentions, ask him things that he can honestly work on as a person. Never believe a person who only speaks good things of themselves. Never date a person who makes themselves seem perfect. Also, when a man tells you something that sounds like a red flag, BELIEVE HIM. Don’t overlook the red flags, when people tell you things like that you gotta take it for the truth. Don’t look past things because he’s attractive or telling you things that sounds good. You have to be wise in every decision that you make when it comes to relationships. Just save yourself the time, effort, energy, and your feelings

They butter you up to make it easier for you to look past terrible flaws when they finally rise to the surface later. It’s a trick that’s easy for any woman to fall for, because once you grow attached any man knows it’s easier for them to get away with a lot more.

start working out now. make that hair dresser appointment now. let your next meal be the healthiest you’ve ever eaten. move the furniture in your room right now. text that old friend or crush. make a new playlist. go on a run. open a window. it doesn’t matter what you do, no matter how big or small change is; change is change. and it will always, always, always help you to turn your life around and clear your head. it gives you that boost, that confidence to be a better version of yourself, no matter the impact it has.

may you get a sign this week that shows you that you’re on the right path and that things are flowing and moving in your favor. may the sign be evident, clear, and direct

reblog if you’re not afraid to have a picture of jesus on your dash

what if you went to heaven but jesus says, why didnt you reblog me when i was feeling myself