in chess the queens can kill each other which is toxic yuri and the kings can never get within a square of each other which is doomed yaoi

The eye doctor is the most fun doctor you can go to. They never steal your blood. They never make you get naked and put on a paper dress. They're just like, "Can you see these letters? It's fine if you can't, we can fix that." And they don't even spell anything.

Every time I go they put me in a chair and they say look into this machine there's a hot air balloon or a farmhouse in there and I do and I'm like you're right I see it and they're like yeah keep admiring that hot air balloon or farmhouse and I do and I'm like this shit's quaint as fuck and then do you know what happens next they attack me they jumpscare me with air directly into my eyeballs and i fall out the chair and they say sorryyyy but they're NOT they wanted this to happen they KNEW about the jumpscare well now I'm wise to it now I know better when I go in and they say look at this bodacious hot air balloon I'm like NO WAY DUDE that balloon wishes me harm have at thee and I attack them and push them on the ground and spit on them

I’m tired of “gooners” I’m tired of 4chan terms I’m tired of casual racism I’m tired of all this shit we have to pretend is normal so we don’t upset like the few people who conflate their identities with being edgy, racist and insufferable

i miss vhs tapes and cds i miss feeding my computers and tvs yummy treats. now theyre eating nothing. theyre being born without mouths

saw someone including "Mandate of Heaven" as one of those christian terms tumblr likes to use to sound profound. which i get where you're coming from but t☝️hat one is chinese

the thing about those tesla stickers is that 90% of the time they're on a car that was made after it was already common knowledge that elon was a fascist lol

like if this was just people driving 2010 tesla roadsters then i guess MAYBE they could pull the "i didn't know" card but it never is. it's always some guy in a 2023 model 3 or something

men and women are not opposites. men and women are not enemies. men and women are two parts of a broad coalition which fights against a mutual enemy: inkjet printers

calling ppl "larpers" to insinuate theyre fake fans of smth/poorly pretending to be smth is so fucking stupid cuz. tell me u have never met a real LARPer without saying u have never met a real LARPer. those guys care. they are fucking locked in dude. like LARP is a lifestyle its a commitment they care so much. they're not fake nerds either like fake nerds just repost LOTR gifsets and talk about how nerdy they are for being into like, fucking batman and stuff. LARPers know their shit. they read the whole Silmarillion. they know who Ambush Bug is. like get LARP's name out of your fucking mouth