🦄💖😽

Gods no. Any would-be lover of mine has to know how to play the games I enjoy. And you don't have the mental capacity to remotely begin to understand.

i know how to play all kinds of games, actually, and that's pretty mean of you to say without even trying to play one with me. i think maybe you're just scared of losing.

Hmm i can do some digging. i have saved a number of databaces from the old world. If not i can use my Ai engine to make one. I bet that would be hot.

I think we should put your megan fox video up!

oh, please don't ai me. i don't want to be turned into a robot. i once dated a guy who made me watch robocop, and i fell asleep. not going through that again.

totally! maybe she's here, and she'll see it, and realize how hot we look together.

Right. So far those clues tell me he's either a rat, a capybara, or a very round, very sad man in need of an amputation. This is like playing Guess Who? with Tinkerbell, it's fucking great. Next question, how huge a boob are we talking?

Sorry babe, I only take payments in the form of cash or credit. Besides, I think if I tried to cash that check of yours, Sue Sylvester would throw me overboard.

none of the above! but you're getting closer! this is fun! a twenty-five pounder!

oh, she wouldn't do that. she's really nice, she gave me a tracksuit.

I could live with being in my bad girl era, I am a bad bitch... although I cannot explain the pain inside me when I think about that kid claiming she invented gay pop, I think she had that ridiculous ponytail tied too tight for too long. At least I never have to hear about her again.

Well that's something I guess, I really did not feel like breaking up an mlm scheme on my first day, good call

how do you know she's not on the boat with us? ...i guess we probably would have heard her by now.

well, i can't speak for anyone else, so... i don't know if i'd get too excited yet, but at least no one has to worry about getting in trouble out here, since there's no rules out at sea!

Oh, yeah, leggings suck, I don't think I've ever worn a pair that I haven't got a hole in somewhere within the first couple of hours... also I'm just impressed that he's a cat that can write. Although now I'm having an existential crisis wondering if his handwriting is better than mine, because like... people have said mine is illegible, what if it is, what if I write worse than a cat THAT DOESN'T EVEN HAVE OPPOSABLE THUMBS???

i think it's almost kind of romantic, in a way. shows you lived life, just like wrinkles or stains. when i was little it made me sad sometimes when my clothes went through the washing machine, and not just because i saw that horror movie where they accidentally put their adopted mouse son in there.

did you know there are cats out there with six toes? not even just total, but on each paw? i met one once, i'm still not totally convinced that she wasn't an alien like from lilo and stitch.

did you try soap?

so cool! me too!

i.... what? how did you get catfished by his photos? i have so many questions again!

y'know, i must say that i really do like your logic and outlook on things, brittany!

well, maybe lord tubbington will get back into the legging business again some day! you're right though. they probably do with all those legs that they have.

hi, stella! of course we're friends. us girls have to stick together, right? especially when it comes to me getting slices of cake. it's all about the balance. i gotta be the perfect combo, or it won't work out right, i don't think.

it can happen to anyone, haven't you seen the show? it's a scary world out there.

thanks!

oh, i hope not. or, at least, if he does, i hope it's with ones that are less scratchy. totally! plus, i bet they're less scratchy down there, since the water balances it out or something.

did you not see the swindling part?

well, he might be a free-loader, but he's still my best friend. and ice cream is always better when you've got someone to share it with. or little bits of oreo in it.

i think i'm a little better than just okay. not to brag, but the people in my phone once said that i'm a 4.3/10. that's a passing grade!

It was not a compliment.

was it a threat? are we fighting? enemies to lovers?

Go to the main dining room and ask for the pet menu! Uh..thanks? I'm gay, but we can be friends!

No, I didn't want my hair to fall out.

We seem to do! What do you do on the ship? Do you like musicals, fashion, and fine dining?

is it just for pets, or are you guys actually cool and people can eat from it too? some people are weird about it, but i think they're just jealous of my shiny coat. i mean hair.

oh? i am too, kind of. just another thing we have in common!

do you think she cursed it? that was probably a good call, then.

that's kind of a personal question don't you think?

musicals? you mean like cats? do you think the butthole cut is true or just a suburban legend?

I wont mention the gum dont worry.

I can see it now. Your face plastered over all the screens. Let me just tinker here a little and i can have you up in like 20 minutes.

really? do you think you could find a movie of me and megan fox making out? i've always wanted to see that.

thank you. 😊

i'm gonna be famous! this is just like that dream i had.

No orgasm would be good enough to forget this conversation.

thank you <3 that's really sweet of you to say.