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oozey mess
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ellievsbear
occasionally subtle

roma★

titsay
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

Origami Around
art blog(derogatory)
RMH
Sweet Seals For You, Always
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@briar--rising

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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we should mandate industrial themed nonbinary names to balance out all of the people naming themselves after trees. throw Anvil into the mix
I really love those posts of people showing their stuffed animals various things and locations, gonna start doing that
showing my giant ground sloth the Feather River and the Feather River Fish Hatchery fish ladder
showing my cat the location of the last stagecoach hold-up in San Mateo County
showing my sockeye salmon The Gates Of Hell
showing my humpback whale Methuselah the coast redwood
showing my banana slug the grave of Emperor Norton
showing my tiger the geographic center of California
showing my elephant seal a spirit photograph
showing my javalina the 1906 earthquake fence
man half of my mutuals are named some shit like Snooble at this point im doing some poob as bullshit in my life
wbat the hell you weren't even exaggerating

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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et tu brute?
Reblog this and tell me what was your biggest crying over a piece of fiction. You can be vague if you don't want to spoil.
✷ Falconry Hoods ✷
Bro tumblr put a mature content filter on this…I get it’s sorta like a bondage hood SORT OF but it’s FALCONRY!!
Sorry for making the birds too…sexy? tumblr…I guess??
Discussions of various medical things, glp-1s, and intentional weight loss for serious health reasons below. Some numbers included, don't read if that will trigger you
I'm starting to seriously consider going on a glp-1. I'm so against them in 95% of cases. I don't feel like they've been researched enough, I don't trust some of the research that is out there bc of the financial incentives in the weight loss industry, and so many of my problems are medication related that I'm very reluctant to add more. And yet. And yet.
I've been managing to lose weight without them, but it's very very very slow and it's quite difficult. In the past 5 months of really trying I've lost around 10 pounds, which is just not enough. I need to lose over 50 more pounds before I'm in the range the surgeon said I should be in to operate more safely. It's getting a little easier to eat less and move more and I expect progress to speed up slightly through the summer, but it'll for sure slow down again eventually/I'll hit a plateau well before the necessary amount is lost.
And that's the word. "Necessary." To what extent is it necessary? I want it not to be necessary at all. And in some ways it isn't. No one is putting a gun to my head. I'm not going to DEFINITELY die during surgery if I don't lose weight, and frankly I'm not going to DEFINITELY survive even if I do lose it all. Still, the difference between a 1% mortality rate and a 5% mortality rate is pretty significant. Frankly, both numbers are way too high, but those are what I have to work with. I don't want to die. I really really do not want to die.
And I don't want to die BEFORE the surgery either. I ignore it most of the time, but I know that I have a pretty genuine risk of dying at any given moment. I mean, to a certain extent all people do, but I have an elevated risk. With tumors the size of mine, one could rupture whenever and I could easily bleed out internally before there's time to save me. And that's fucking terrifying. And if more weight loss will reduce the risk of that happening, well. I would like to reduce the risk of that happening.
The thing is I don't want to be stuck on these meds I don't trust and don't know enough about for the rest of my life. And I don't want to deal with long-term consequences and risks we don't currently know about. But tbh, I'm currently dealing with short terms risks that are fairly serious, so I really do have to consider the pros and cons. And it has occurred to me that what I could potentially do is go on the meds until the surgery. And then go off them after, and frankly if I regain some weight after the surgery I don't fucking care, bc that's the only reason I'm doing this in the first place. So the thought of potentially having a clear end date makes me slightly more willing to consider the option.
I don't know. I'm still really, really torn. I think whatever my MRI results are will probably influence my decision somewhat, I should have those in a few days. But I'm considering it more seriously than I have in the past bc I'm really afraid of dying and I hate having the potential future surgery just kind of hanging over me without feeling confident I can do what I need to do before then. Not that it's a guarantee even with the meds, but they could probably help. Idk just wanted to process some thoughts. I might share more thoughts as I have them. Responses are welcome (though of course not required) so long as they acknowledge the nuance of the situation
Portable Irish harp (Dublin, circa 1820) made by John Egan (Irish, active about 1804–1841).
Maple and spruce.
Image and text information courtesy MFA Boston.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Love going to bed with a new, good daydream scenario fresh in my mind. Like yes girl, movie night!
I have my annual MRI this morning. I'm so incredibly anxious about it, which is a little silly. It's almost certainly going to show very little change. But a part of me can't help but constantly go "But what if the tumors are growing so much they insist on doing the surgery ASAP??????" Even though that's very unlikely. Idk. I guess we'll find out soon :)
Ooh ooh ooh! This looks like an excellent excuse valid reason to talk about one of my favorite topics, matriarch trees!
So, when you see trees in a forest, they stick up outta the ground, some distance from each other, and you're like 'these are unconnected critters,' right? But! The thing is! Just like the trees in the picture are connected above-ground, trees in a forest are normally connected below-ground. There's this whole complicated thing involving a symbiotic relationship with fungi, but we're gonna simplify it to this: trees connect to each other through their root systems.
And they use it to share resources, across the whole forest.
If there's a tree over here growing in soil with a lot of, like, potassium, they'll pull up more potassium than they need, and send it out through the root system to other trees that are living where there isn't much potassium.
And one of the coolest things? Trees communicate their needs. If a tree is sick or damaged or starving, they send chemical messages out through the root system that tell the other trees to send them more food and tree-equivalent-of-immune-system.
Trees will share so much of their resources, they'll even keep trees alive that are almost entirely dependent. Like this tree! The tree above is getting some energy from its leaves, but no other nutrition of its own. And it wasn't able to link up to the shared root system. So the other tree reached out and hooked up to it directly, feeding it all of the nutrients it needed!
You see it more commonly the other way around: in an old-growth forest, where the roots are well-established, you can find stumps where a tree was cut down a century ago... but if you scrape the stump it's still green wood. The tree's still alive, without a single leaf. Because all the other trees in the forest are feeding it.
I promised to talk about matriarch trees, so here's where we get to them.
In a very old forest, you have very old trees. You have some trees that are so very, very old, their own roots cover entire regions of the forest. Their leaves reach up to the sky over everyone else. And after so long, they've developed to where they can take in way more resources than they need.
So what do they do?
They feed baby trees.
Baby saplings in an old forest can't reach up to the sun. There's no light down there. And their roots are too small and shallow to dig down to the nutrients they need. So the matriarch tree will draw energy from its towering canopy, and nutrients from its massive, ancient roots, and feed them to the little trees that are too small to feed themselves. For anything she can't get on her own, she'll act as a central hub, taking in spare resources from the rest of the forest and giving them to the little ones.
And one of the best parts - she won't just do it for her own species. She'll connect to all kinds of trees, because they're all necessary for the ecosystem to work. She'll adopt the whole forest's children.
Sometimes in forests you'll find a spot where there are a lot of small trees in an open space around an old, fallen tree. People generally assume they could find more light there, or maybe the soil's more fertile from the decomposition.
But no.
They're her children, and she's spent centuries keeping the whole forest alive.
sci fi is all about getting so scared and ripping tubes out of yourself. people miss this
sci fi is all about desperately trying to reclaim your violated bodily autonomy. it’s all about asserting that you are a being with agency, and you can choose what happens to your own person, even if that’s ripping tubes out of yourself. and also sometimes an alien is there

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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"fruit has sugar" warning post reminds me of my coworker who told me to make sure I don't get "addicted to fruit". yeah i'm also addicted to a nice walk on the beach
me after developing a debilitating fruit addiction
really love keeping up with my mutuals through their little tags and vent posts. getting updates on how they’re doing is something like: glad to know your job at the library is going well. i’m sorry you haven’t gotten that raise. glad your finals went well. i’m sorry your teacher is so unhelpful. glad your tv show got renewed. i’m sorry they killed your favorite character. glad that you scored tickets to see your favorite artist. i’m sorry they aren’t touring near you at all. glad your cat is doing well. i’m sorry your mom is sick again. glad you’re feeling better now that it’s your favorite season. i’m sorry your meds aren’t working. glad you’re married now. i’m sorry you have to step back for your mental health. glad you’re still here. i’m sorry life is so hard. glad you’re alive, i hope things get easier for you soon