Overly Emotional Lizzard 🦎

Life update:

Hey y’all! Just a quick announcement to say that I’m nonbinary and I go by they/them or she/her pronouns!

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TW

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I have been suicidal since I was about 12 years old. The spiral downward that I’ve been going through for 10 years now has become way too much for me to deal with. Nothing brings me joy anymore. My anxiety makes it so hard to leave the house. Keeping my job has been really hard. I don’t want to get out of bed. Most days, I don’t. I don’t want to interact with people. Most of the people I have come to love have decided it would be best to exit my life. I can’t exactly blame them. I’m a fucking mess. I wouldn’t want to deal with someone like myself either. Shit, I don’t want to deal with myself. I’m at the point of no return. I don’t see any use in seeking help. I am too far gone. I don’t think I’ll ever get better. I’m just a ghost anymore. I float around in life, not doing or saying much. My chest is so heavy and my emotions cannot be controlled. I’m going off of the deep end and I’m going to drown. I don’t think this was the life I was supposed to be in. I wasn’t supposed to live in this timeline. My soul needs to ascend to a place it can be happy and free, and that place is not here. I feel too trapped to be free. I was never meant for this life. Hopefully soon I won’t have to be here anymore.