Blimey

remember when Elementary adapted the holmes stories and made Watson a woman which removed the gay subtext but then made Moriarty also a woman and gave them weird lesbian subtext. masterful technique. the never-before-seen uno yuri reverse

Also, if you are a non-disabled person reading this, please help advocate for accessibility. It gets tiring being the only person fighting for basic access rights.

👹 yo bro 👋 come over here 👋 come over here check out my new shoes they’re the 👹 BRAND NEW ☺️ oooone twoo~ buckle my shoooooe~ 🤗 threee four~ buckle some mooooore~ 😇 fiiiive six, nike kicks! 👹 OOHOOHOOHOO that is so FIRE! 🧍🏼‍♂️ ahahahaha

usamerican soldier STUNNED into silence when he learns that his willing and paid participation in the murder and neocolonization of foreign people is a huge red flag to everyone with a conscience

ok we can do petplay but Only if I’m the fly. If that’s ok… rubs my hands together … zzzzzz…. Hope I don’t get swatted…. Zzzzzzzzz

died at the window sill

well maybe you should blearily wake up at 5:08 in the pre-dawn light and find the sleeping soft tiny mammal body of your cat just inches from your head like a miracle too beautiful for speech, and you should rustle one hand out from your blankets to rub fingertip circles across the warm eggshell dome of her little velvet-wrapped skull and on the bristly patches just where the cups of her ears begin, and as she inclines her head into your fingers and purrs without ever opening her little eyes you should feel a love so tender that you understand how that love could have reached out from the fireside into the inky spangled nights long gone to reach her, and then you'll feel better

[Image ID: Tumblr tag from hotTubSharts reading: and then maybe she'll wake you again at 6 to the sound of her puking on the floor. maybe /End ID]

The American century of humiliation is goin great 👍

you have to be nicer to nonbinary transfems and that's literally the bare minimum

I’m soooooo embarrassed. My lord told me “good night,” but I thought he was calling me a good knight, and, well, you could hear it clink against my codpiece.

forever thinking about that girl at my uni orientation who, after being told to pour out her water bottle before entering an event, looked at me and said "they tell us to stay hydrated and then make us pour out our water, this is like totally kafkaesque" and then poured out what was very obviously an entire water bottle full of whiskey. hope she's doing well.