the first thing u need to understand about athletes is that they are cringe losers bc they skipped school in hopes of never having to work a real job. the second thing you need to understand abt athletes is that they are first and foremost workers whose years of lucrative labour are capped by the very real limit that the strain of that selfsame work puts on their bodies which means they retire at an age before most people's careers even really take off and are expected to get by for the rest of their lives on the money they earned those few years. the third thing you need to understand is that they want to fuck their coworker.

I love that we’re playing the Stars in the preseason so that we can start off the year with the appropriate amount of hate in our hearts for success.

to the enlightened mind, hockey pads are both armour and lingerie, in this essay I will