Salt cannot be the only tasty rock

this episode only hones in my people pleaser carme propaganda. (giggles.)

already, carme makes himself ready to be of service to anyone who needs him and makes himself as available as possible.

i worry what his definition of "hanging out" with friends means because to him it just seems like being the bag-carrier (for lack of a better term). when solar asks what kind of activities they both could enjoy together for their first hang out, carme does not try to suggest anything they both could enjoy, solely what he believes solar would like. when carme offers going to the mall, it isn't because there's anything there carme would like to see; it's because he wants there to be free range for solar to lead what they do. we have ideas of carme's possible hobbies and his enjoyment of crafts, but he never brings this into conversation. being friends with someone and spending time together means doing things you both like. getting to know each other and developing that bond early on is very potent. part of that is participating in the other's interests even if you have little to no previous knowledge of it, and this makes the dynamic more likely to flourish as you both become more comfortable and aware of each other's character. this is similarly executed; however, a lot of this hanging out at times feels one-sided. hear me out…example: carme takes solar to the food court and a bar. the activity of eating, which carme cannot participate in because he does not have that function, means he can't connect with solar in that experience. carme tries to please solar, and it's to an imbalance of communication. i do not push the blame on solar for this, but this episode was more about talking to solar about his troubles and tending to his needs rather than a mutual conversation and connecting over your burdens. carme is in no way inclined to fully open up to solar, but when solar tries to push for that connection (asking about rigel), it is redirected back to him (asking about solar's sun after his vagueness).

keep in mind that solar originally sought out carme intending to be "fixed". when carme was unable to fulfill that purpose, he could not comprehend it and actually shuts down "if you can't fix me, then who can?. when it came to having a friendship with carme, it was lunar who brought it up, not solar. solar has to be told that perhaps having carme as a friend rather than someone he expects to just fix his problems would be better, if not more beneficial.

in the end, this relationship sort of falls back into the pillar of carme becoming that dependable pillar people cling to, while never receiving any devotion back. because carme is as alluring and easy to talk to as he is, it's more effortless for people to use him for leverage, whether that is the intention or not. and i, of course, do not think solar means to do this, but he is in a very broken state of mind, one he's aware of.

(it reminds me a lot of how terra was treated during her therapist arc.) the difference is that terra knows she has purpose outside of being a "therapist". she wears her heart on her sleeve and makes it known she had grown to dislike having that role in the family because it grew overwhelming. the constant conflict between the family and being the voice of reason, while never having someone to rely on because those people were the same individuals causing harm or being harmed, leads to her breaking point of becoming detached from the character she once was. CARME IS THE OPPOSITE OF THIS. he fully believes his purpose is to live for other people, to be there when they need him. he doesn't know anything else other than to be accommodating (MORE CONDITIONED BEHAVIOR!!).

as much as carme is obedient, he is still defiant. carme is naturally charismatic, so it comes easy to divert attention from himself and force the focus back on someone else. im sure this is why the attention was more on solar this episode. it is not just because of solar's unintentional need for stability, but rather carme's intentional need to fulfill his purpose. like its almost a way of coping at this point. he would rather have someone else to focus on. even if he does not have anything else in his schedule to act as an aide, he will push for it.

this episode also reinforces my thoughts on carme caring for others till it reaches its limits. rather than his loved one's life being at stake, this was over a conversation. as a people pleaser, carme excuses the store owner's discrimination and offers his aid despite being so mean, simply because he can sense there is more to the story behind her behavior. (this is shown similarly in carme's refusal to stand up for aspen from their bullies + reaching out to titan even after his harm against the family.) he keeps pushing and pushing to help, to the point solar has to be the one to advocate for them both. at this moment, it is solar who threatens to get mean and unapologetically shows it. carme doesn't understand people's thought process for reacting negatively when it doesn't align with how he perceives it should be expressed or handled (moon's behavior towards sun during uno). i think solar is one of the first to really show carme another way of handling these emotions that don't result in complete violence, and it's something i can really appreciate about their relationship. the moment a similar situation occurs at the bar, he finally puts his foot down and handles it in a way he allows himself to feel is appropriate. it's small, but its carme actually rebelling against his nature.

i've said before that carme comes off as this put-together individual who still has more to learn about the world around him, but in a way i have learned he's also just as naive about people. it is in contrast to moon who is working on himself but is admittedly bad at emotions, and that has affected his relationships enough to create distance because moon can't take into account how his words or actions affect those around him. carme overthinks people's emotions, to where he feels the need to insert himself and direct a situation he is not asked to. in turn, this leads to a constant cycle of becoming an emotional shield and developing co-dependent relationships in different spectrums. NOT saying this is how i view solar and carme's relationship or how i believe it will turn out, but subtle patterns FROM CARME i am noticing that i do think can develop better in the future. carme needs the celestial family as much as they need him.

they're so cute. i love them.