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I promise I'm still alive, I just struggle to maintain social media accounts these days!

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I took some historical sword-fighting lessons to make the fights in my novel more realistic - here’s what I learned.
To make the fighting scenes in my low fantasy novel more realistic, I went to see a trainer for historical sword-fighting last week, both to barrage her with questions and to develop realistic choreographies for the fight scenes in the novel. Since I figured some of what she told me might be useful for you too, I put together a small list for you. Big thanks to Gladiatores Munich and Jeanne for making time! (Here are some more pictures if you’re interested.)
Caveat: I’m by no means a sword-fighting expert myself, so take these nuggets with a grain of salt – I might have misremembered or misinterpreted some of the things Jeanne told me. If I did, feel free to tell me.
1.) Weapon choices need to make sense
Let’s start with a truism: always ensure your character’s weapons make sense for a.) their profession, b.) their cultural background and c.) the environment they’re going to fight in. A farmer probably couldn’t afford a sword and might use a knife or threshing flail instead, and someone who doesn’t want to be noticed probably wouldn’t be milling about sporting a glaive or another large weapon. Also, soldiers native to a country with wide open plains would be more likely to carry long-range melee weapons such as spears or large swords, than those from a country consisting of mostly jungle or dense forests. The same applies to situations: if your character is going to be fighting in close quarters (even just a normal house), he’d get little value out of a spear or even a longsword, as there’d be no space to swing it effectively.
2.) Boldness often beats skill
In real swordfights, recklessness was often more important than technique. The fighter less afraid of getting injured would often push harder, allowing them to overpower even opponents with better technique.
3.) Even a skilled fighter rarely stands a chance when outnumbered
While a skilled (or lucky) fighter might win a two-versus-one, it’d be extremely unlikely for even a single master swordsman to win against superior numbers, even just three and if they’re below his skill level. The only way to plausibly pull this off would be to split the opponents up, perhaps by luring them into a confined space where you could take them on one by one. The moment you’re surrounded, you’re probably done for – because, unlike in Hollywood, they wouldn’t take turns attacking but come at you all at once.
4.) Dual-wielding was a thing
… at least in some cultures. I often heard people say that people using a weapon in each hand is an invention of fiction. And while my instructor confirmed that she knew of no European schools doing this—if they did, it’s not well-documented—she said it was a thing in other cultures. Example of this include the dual wakizashi in Japan or tomahawk and knife in North America. However, one of the biggest problems with the depiction of dual wielding in novels/movies/games are the “windmill”-type attacks where the fighter swings their weapons independently, hitting in succession rather than simultaneously. Normally you’d always try hitting with both weapons at once, as you’d otherwise lose your advantage.
5.) Longswords were amazing
Longswords might seem boring in comparison to other weapons, but they were incredibly effective, especially in combat situations outside the battlefield. The crossguard allowed for effective blocking of almost any kind of attack (well, maybe not an overhead strike of a Mordaxt, but still), the pommel was also used as a powerful “blunt” weapon of its own that could crack skulls. Though they were somewhat less effective against armored opponents, the long, two-handed hilt allowed for precise thrusts at uncovered body parts that made up for it.
6.) “Zweihänder” were only used for very specific combat situations
Zweihänder—massive two-handed swords—were only used for specific purposes and usually not in one-on-one combat as is often seen in movies or games. One of these purposes was using their reach to break up enemy formations. In fact, one type of two-handed sword even owed its name to that purpose: Gassenhauer (German, Gasse = alley, Hauer = striker)—the fighters literally used it to strike “alleys” into an enemy formation with wide, powerful swings.
7.) It’s all about distance
While I was subconsciously aware of this, it might be helpful to remember that distance was an incredibly important element in fights. The moment your opponent got past your weapons ideal range, it was common to either switch to a different weapon or just drop your weapon and resort to punching/choking. A good example of this are spears or polearms—very powerful as long as you maintain a certain range between you and your opponent, but the moment they get too close, your weapon is practically useless. That’s also why combatants almost always brought a second weapon into battle to fall back one.
8.) Real fights rarely lasted over a minute
Another truism, but still useful to remember: real fights didn’t last long. Usually, they were over within less than a minute, sometimes only seconds – the moment your opponent landed a hit (or your weapon broke or you were disarmed), you were done for. This is especially true for combatants wearing no or only light armor.
9.) Stop the pirouettes
Unfortunately, the spinning around and pirouetting that makes many fight scenes so enjoyable to watch (or read) is completely asinine. Unless it’s a showfight, fighters would never expose their backs to their opponent or even turn their weapon away from them.
10.) It still looks amazing
If your concern is that making your fight scenes realistic will make them less aesthetic, don’t worry. Apart from the fact that the blocks, swings and thrusts still look impressive when executed correctly, I personally felt that my fights get a lot more gripping and visceral if I respect the rules. To a certain extent, unrealistic and flashy combat is plot armor. If your characters can spin and somersault to their heart’s content and no one ever shoves a spear into their backs as they would have in real life, who survives and who doesn’t noticeably becomes arbitrary. If, on the other hand, even one slip-up can result in a combatant’s death, the stakes become palpable.
That’s about it! I hope this post is as helpful to some of you as the lessons were to me. Again, if anything I wrote here is bollocks, it’s probably my fault and not Jeanne’s. I’ll try to post more stuff like this in the future.
Cheers,
Nicolas
I've been a little quiet on this account due to trying to juggle more than one piece of social media and honestly? It's definitely a hit or miss means.
For The Pirate That Has Everything
Fiona was always a cautious woman, The once-pirate always kept an eye on every exit from the moment she first entered a room. She also had a way of taking a measure of a man within minutes of conversation. Simply put, for the captain, there were no more surprises.
And yet there she was, slack-jawed and speechless when Samara shoved a pile of wrapped bundles into her arms.
Fiona knocking it out of the park once again! She made me cry using my own character, double whammied.
Michael Schneider
[ID
A photo of a man reading a neon sign on a tree that says “Healing also means taking responsibility for the role you play in your own suffering”.
End ID]
the rudest most helpful thing anyone ever said to me is "why do you keep hurting your own feelings long after [the person who once hurt you] probably forgot about it" like literally just dear god you've split me open so neatly my entire soul is just flopping around on the ground between us now but thank you
Just fyi if you're autistic/adhd and struggle specifically with this sort of thing, please know what what might be happening is something called perseveration, which is a common neurodivergent behavior that can include, among other things, revisiting emotions repeatedly and being unable to break loose from processing or managing stressful events.
Don't keep hurting your own feelings. But don't feel bad if you get stuck there, either. Something else could be going on.
this specific thing is often what people are referring to as "[X] living rent free in your head"

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Reminder that BetterHelp doesn't give a fuck about their patients and is actually a fucking terrible way to get therapy.
Please find other alternatives for BH because they're ATROCIOUS.
Absolutely BEWARE..a proper therapist holds their patient's privacy. This is disgusting.
ଘ(੭*ˊᵕˋ)੭* ੈ♡‧₊˚
This is a terrifying norm I’ve been seeing in fandom recently, with a lot of people asking for photo ID’s to enter a server or for 18+ commissions or to follow a private Twitter account. While I understand the sentiment and realize that there’s an issue of minors trying to get into adult spaces, this is an incredibly dangerous practice that needs to stop.
I have seen this popping up more and more in the past year and frankly, I’m sick of sitting back and watching it become a social norm. Not to mention, there is a huge difference between a company with a team of lawyers and legal statements with the intention to protect your information and giving this to a random person online.
Here is an article from IAPP discussing more in depth the current difficulties for age verification online. Thanks to @murmurkins for digging around to find this!
Here is also some resources for Discord specifically on how to moderate and run a server that has 18+ channels and designating a server as 18+. Discord also notes that if you are locked out of 18+ channels, you can appeal this by sending a picture of yourself and either a photo ID or your Discord tag. Again, while not a perfect solution, this is their last resort, not the intial requirement. It’s dangerous to do, and Discord recognizes this, which is why they have a system to protect your information AND they require that all third-party individuals have a privacy policy telling individuals how they will protect others’ information.
If anyone wants to respond to this post with more information on other websites, feel free! The biggest issue I have seen with this is on Discord, so that is where my information is focused.
TL;DR: Don’t give your ID out online to random people for your safety. Make sure who you are giving personal information to has a privacy policy. While it is an issue that minors are accessing 18+ content, this is not a safe solution to the problem.
I remember when Y!Gallery tried this back in, like, 2012. And most of us flatly refused. This blows my mind. What happened to the never share personal details online mindset of the 90s and early 2000s?
Facebook. Facebook happened.
There is NO VALID REASON for anyone online to ask for your photo ID.
Because - and hey, this is a BIG THING - you show photo ID in person so the viewer can look at it, and you, and say, “yep, those match.”
If you are conversing via email or chat… they cannot look at your face and confirm it matches the card.
If they CAN confirm it matches the card (like you’re meeting in Zoom)…. you can photoshop the damn card to attach your face to it.
You cannot usefully check photo ID online. The vast majority of people asking for “photo ID” are identify fraudsters, and the rest are people who don’t understand tech & security.
Do not share your ID with anyone online.
Facts about your body after you turn 25, AKA things I wish someone had told me:
you will get hair in fun new places. this is normal and fine.
these places include (but are not limited to) if you don't already have them: your asscrack, your back, your ears, and moles. it's fine.
some of you, dick or not, will also lose hair. this is normal, but also if you have ovaries maybe get this checked out for PCOS.
your acne will probably change. some people get better. some people get worse. it's fine.
your nails will probably get an infection or a fungus at least once in your life. this is fine. (but also let your doc know).
how you gain and lose fat and where you do so will change. this is fine.
how you smell will change. this is fine. (fishy or rotten smells mean doctor time though)
if you have a prostate: it gets harder to pee. prostates enlarge as you age (get this checked regularly). this is fine.
if you do not have a prostate: it gets easier to pee but not in a good way. as in as you get older, your pelvic floor muscles tend to lose some of their strength. this makes it harder to keep pee in. this is fine.
all breasts and pectorals eventually sag, with the rest of your body. this is fine.
a decent percent of the population will experience a cyst at least once. some of you will make up for the rest with multiple. this is fine, but keep them checked out by a doctor. (sometimes this is a condition! get checked for that too!)
almost half of everyone gets hemorrhoids. it's a good idea to just expect them since your chances of getting them get higher the older you are. your toilet will look like a murder scene. definitely get your booty checked out BUT this is almost always perfectly normal. just eat more fiber. "but I already-" eat more fiber. and maybe suck it up and buy some hemorrhoid cream, you'll thank me later.
yes, this means you will probably need to make an appointment for a doctor to see your butthole. it's okay. not only do they really not care but 1. they've seen weirder that day and 2. they'd far rather you see them now than later when it's been going on for forty years and now it might be colon cancer. it's okay. consider it a rite of passage.
adults need more sleep than children. don't believe the myth that you need less than they do. that is capitalist propaganda to make you give up more of your life to the work grind, comrade.
vitamins and medicine, something you are more likely to take as you get older, sometimes make the toilet turn weird colors. it's okay.
if you still have your tonsils and get those little stones and get sore throats more than once a year you should plan on getting those suckers out before the tonsils cause an infection and go septic. if you're getting stones at all you should get those reevaluated every year, especially if the stones are bigger than a needlehead (or get bigger over time). it's gross and yucky. I don't care. get them looked at before you end up in the hospital.
you'll probably need to add foot support to your shoes if you don't already do. this is fine.
your body changes. sometimes it can feel sorta weird and upsetting that it isn't what it used to be. that is okay, and it is okay to be upset. just know that this is normal, it's normal to be upset or not upset, but don't let it hinder your quality of life. trans or cis, there is a certain level of acceptance you just gotta give your body and forgive your body for as you get older. it's okay.
it's okay. I promise.
Trust me when I say, this is a huge eye-opener (I am 33, I wish I was told even a fraction of this stuff).
COMMISSIONS ARE OPEN!!
Hello, due to me recently being let go from my job (thanks A/I/) I decided to spruce up my commission carrd and get that ready for doing art commissions again! If you are interested please feel free to fill out the commission form found within the carrd and I shall get back to you ASAP! Find everything here!

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Haunted Hootenanny Art Raffle
We're three weeks out y'all! Time to get those costumes sorted and packed - the Hoot will be here before you know it! We know you're curious, so have a tantalizing peak at this year's raffle artists!
A big ol' Fence thank you to this year's artists: @irishmoo, @itsjustbeek, @soppendeuff and @wooflings!
Find out everything you need to know, including how to get in on the October 7th raffle [here].
YOU hates terfs
rb if u hates terfs
Haunted Hootenanny Art Raffle
We're three weeks out y'all! Time to get those costumes sorted and packed - the Hoot will be here before you know it! We know you're curious, so have a tantalizing peak at this year's raffle artists!
A big ol' Fence thank you to this year's artists: @irishmoo, @itsjustbeek, @soppendeuff and @wooflings!
Find out everything you need to know, including how to get in on the October 7th raffle [here].
Come participate in our Haunted Hootenanny event! It's a rip-roaring good time for the spooky season!
Whoa wHOA WHOA WHAT THE
Tumblr why'd you change to look like Twitter!?
I apologize for showing my age here, but what the frick frack snick snack are all these new functions

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Those around me likely have seen the changes, but I will be switching up what I do with this blog. Apologies if you had hoped to interact with me a long while back, but, my spark was gone to continue the main story on tumblr after the death of our good friend and loremaker, Dave.
Considering his last wishes on his own characters, I am shelving my main universe for Samara for now. It does not feel right to continue using his work, even if he gave us his blessing, it just isn’t the same without his input or his characters being a major part of development. I had long stood idle on this and well over the pandemic.. but it’s finally time to make a decision.
Sadly, this means this is no longer an interactive blog for Samara, but it certainly will be a resource on my end. Samara still exists and I do still roleplay, but I have been experimenting outside of my comfort zones and into different universes, writings, and with people whom have given me the inspiration to develop her more as a person.
This will become a place I put aesthetic, headcanons, and maybe some idle tabletop writings in the near future.
yall want to talk about how beautiful @ingenixre’s oc is?
//GAAAAAH! You really are too sweet to me.. ;~;