Danny Devito red carpet crocs

The nude beach has the best seashells. This fucking sucks. I love seashells but I hate penis.

if Humpty Dumpty ever stopped being in danger then he would lose his identity & go insane

many of you seem to live like this

Blackout poetry exists on a dual axis from "banal" to "insightful" on the input side and "kind of deep" to "incredibly fucking dumb" on the output side, and while taking something banal and producing something kind of deep is well and fine, for my money taking something insightful and rendering it incredibly fucking dumb is where the real art is.

#i stuck the word 'banal' in there twice specifically so that 'anal' would be low hanging fruit#but i genuinely did not anticipate 'banana' --@prokopetz

i bet girls hated it in 1902 cuz you would constantly go on dates w guys who are working on an invention to present at the world fair

“Do dishes” and “take out trash” both require the use of a spell slot, vs “use phone” is a cantrip, and brother, I am a level one wizard