The Lad

A BIRD POOPED ON MY HEAD ON THE WAY TO WORK.

HOW DO YOU KNOW THE BIRD WAS ON THE WAY TO WORK?

DONT MAKE ME ANGRIER THAN I AM

If music was a bair of boobs I would take the bra off

Im up there in his pussy like a dog drinking water

my mother is playing pikmin and yelling at them in the exact tone of voice she uses for me and my siblings so we go into fight or flight every time. we thought initially that this meant she regarded the pikmin as akin to her children, but I now fear she’s always viewed us as pikmin

Let's trill and frolic with mama

still fuming mad about that one reddit post that was like “halloween adults are just as bad as Disney adults” I just want to give people candy and wear costumes and tell scary stories, not fund the atrocities committed by a $200 billion dollar nightmare corporation. like, don’t get me wrong, a lot of consumerism gets tangled up with Halloween but at its core it is a fairly accessible and fun holiday and it prioritizes creativity and spirit over material goods, unlike modern Christmas.

I know we talk a lot about keep jumping on boxes, but I'm honestly so grateful for Joe hills' knife theory; a variation on spoon theory that says once you're out of spoons, you can choose to take knives instead in the knowledge that it will hurt later. and the number of times I've told myself 'ok let's take the knives' is so high that I've found it really helps to acknowledge it. Thanks, Joe

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This is it. The internet has come full circle. You can all go home now. We’re done.

they call me an undercover agent. the way i’m. under the covers :) cozy in bed :)

they call me a sleeper agent the way i. well. i shan’t say.