*catswithmakeupon.jpeg*

every time you make freezer food for dinner instead of buying takeout like you actually want you should earn two hundred dollars cash and a round of applause

forever grateful i was simply too lazy to let the make up industrial complex get its hooks in me. I was just like im not doing all of that. im doing none of that in fact

Every time I’ve seen Skweezy Jibbs he’s completing some obscure side quest and being based as hell about it

the biggest mistake people make is assuming that weird sex with women is about mommy issues and weird sex with men is about daddy issues. wrong. a woman can be your father too. #feminism

no come back ma’am

*under my breath* underwater girlfriend

underwater wife

Underwater love of my underwater life

There are benefits to being a marine biologist

underwater girlfriend underwater wife underwater love of my underwater life underwater benefits to underwater studies turning underwater sharks into underwater buddies underwater lovers are the partly sharky sirens seen if you’ve achieved degrees in underwater science

god, your worst warrior needs money

I love this thing.