Sara's Translation Zone

—

Mike: [sigh] I’m hungryyy... Kai, give me something

Kai: Didn’t you say earlier that you had an early lunch in the dressing room and ate a bunch of onigiri? You still want to eat?

Mike: It’s still not enough. I work out so much that if I don’t eat well, I’ll start losing healthy weight quickly

Kai: Hehe! Except for on Archaeology Club days, you’re working pretty hard at soccer, huh? I figured “maybe he’d get hungry in the middle of the contest~”, so I made you an extra lunch. I’ll give it to you later

Mike: What the hell? If you had something, you should’ve given it to me from the beginning. It’s lunchtime now. I’m sure you have it in the dressing room

Kai: STOP STOP! Wait, Mike-kun! You forgot to comment on your impressions!

Mike: Hah? Ah, right. You have to give your impressions on your song or you won’t be able to leave. Um, is...this the microphone? Are you already recording? Oh, right now. [clears throat] Hello! I am Enjoji Mike, a 2nd year member of the Archaeology Club and Soccer Club

Kai: And I’m Akizuki Kai, a 1st year! Like Mike-kun, I’m also in the Archaeology Club!~

Mike [quietly]: ...! Hey, don’t call me by that name...! They’re going to broadcast this, so quit it...!

Kai: Ah, that’s right. [nervous laugh] Hahahaha... E...Enjoji-senpai? I’m not used to calling you that, so it sounds weird, doesn’t it?

Mike [nervously]: U-uhm... Anyways, we sang a song called “Checkmate”. Kai and I practiced together a lot, and I think we did a reasonably good job

Kai: It was Mike-ku- no... Enjoji-senpai who decided on the song. It’s more of a solo song, but we made it into a duet. With that being said, I thought it was nice to hear the song in a new and unique way

[pause for the interviewer to ask a question]

Mike: Eh? Is that why we put this duo together? [quickly] No, not particularly

Kai: It wasn’t particular?

Mike [exasperated]: Of course not. Kai kept throwing a tantrum insisting that we participate in the contest, so I had no choice but to enter. [sigh] He really is such a kid

Kai: That’s mean! You get club points out of it, so isn’t it fine? Besides, it was interesting seeing so many other people from different clubs. Even Enjoji-senpai had fun, didn’t you?

Mike: I guess so. I enjoyed it, for what it was

Kai: Eh~? You were pretty excited~

Mike [mad as hell]: Ha? Wha~t did you just say?

Kai: Hahahaha! I had a great time! I’d love to do another duet in the next contest

Mike [weakly]: I hope they’ll let me sit out next time. Our club earns club points consistently, so there’s no reason for us to be in these competitions. Kai can earn points by making curry, so I’d like him to focus on that

Kai: Making curry is a hobby, so it’s different. I’m not making it because I want points

Mike: You’re always saying that, but you made curry for the Archaeology Club’s booth at the school festival a while ago

Kai: But wasn’t that because there was nothing to do behind the scenes at the festival? Mike-ku- Enjoji-senpai also complained that he didn’t just want to put rocks on a table

Mike: Well, of course. It’s not like we’re kindergarteners playing store

Kai: [chuckles] Hehehe, that’s true, isn’t it?

Mike: But since I participated, even if I don’t win, there’s still a chance I’ll earn points and I’d like to take what I can get

Kai: Yeah! It would be nice to get some kind of award!

Mike: Our performance wasn’t bad. We’ll probably get around one thousand

Kai: You’re so confident!

Mike [proudly]: Of course I’d be! Now then, I think it’s about time we start wrapping up the interview, wouldn’t you agree?

Kai: Are we done already? You didn’t say much about the song... You really can’t wait to get back to the dressing room, huh~?

Mike [murderous intent]: Kai...

Kai: Alright, alright. Well then, thank you all for listening!

Mike: Thank you! ^^; Now, if you’ll excuse us

[they walk away]

Mike [fuming]: HEY, YOU DAMN DOG! Not only were you making fun of me in front of the microphone, but you also kept calling me “Mike” over and over again! You MONGREL! STUPID DOG!!! Why can’t you learn for once?!

Kai: Ngah~ah sorry sorry! 🥺 It’s just that it’s hard to suddenly change what you call someone...

[their voices start becoming more distant as they continue to walk]

Mike: I’ll be taking all of your lunches as punishment. Would that suffice?

Kai: Ahahahaha, you really want to eat lunch, don’t you?

Mike: I guess the hungrier I get, the worse I feel. Let’s get a move on!

—

モノローグ・モノローグ

すれ違う時がことごとくで　いつも伝わらない想いは

届ける術すら分からないで　そっと見守っている

例え言葉は投げやりでも不器用な心の中に

優しさを秘めていることずっと分かってるから

単純明快な鳴声（コトバ）じゃ

見えない本当の気持ちが闇に紛れても

一生懸命なあなたの姿が胸の中で声をあげるよ

難解な場面が訪れたなら

どこにいてもすぐに駆けつけるから

以心伝心で通じた思いが今ここで繋がる奇跡を

愛があるのなら　言葉なんて

きっと伝わらなくてもいい

大切な物はすぐ近くでいつもそこに「在る」から

素直になんかなれもせずに

勝手なことばかりしてるけど

一番大事なことならずっと分かっているさ

一瞬一瞬が永遠の手紙（メッセージ）モノローグが今

言葉に変わるよ

正反対の心が溶け合えば絆はまた結ばれるから

絶体絶命な場面（ステージ）が

まるで僕らを一つにするかのようにね

問題なんて全て超えて行ける絶望すらも希望に変えて

すれ違って　掛け違えて　彷徨って

もどかしくて　伝わらない想いだけど

本当に大事なモノは最初からずっと解り合えてんだ

単純明快な鳴声（コトバ）じゃ見えない

本当の気持ちが闇に紛れても

一生命なあなたの姿が胸の中で声をあげるよ

何回何千回だって叫び続ける心に宿した想い届くまで

最高の台詞（メロディ）を今伝えるよ

—

H No Na-I Cr-I-S-Tm-As

​​I　W I S H　Y O U　Ag Re At Cr I S Tm As

I wish you a great Christmas

I　W I S H　Y O U　Ag Re At Cr I S Tm As

I wish you a great Christmas

I　W I S H　Y O U　Ag Re At Cr I S Tm As

I wish you a great Christmas

H　No　Na I　Cr I S Tm As

A sexless Christmas

I　W I S H　Y O U　Ag Re At　Cr I S Tm As

I wish you a great Christmas

I　W I S H　Y O U　Ag Re At　Cr I S Tm As

I wish you a great Christmas

I　W I S H　Y O U　Ag Re At　Cr I S Tm As

I wish you a great Christmas

H　N U K I　No　I　Lu V　Y O U

An unerotic I love you

​​K O No　Y O　No　S U Be Te Ga　Ge N S O　Na Ra Ba

If everything in this night is a chemical element[1],

K O No　K I Mo C H I　Mo　Ge N S O　Na No

Then these feelings are chemical elements too

Y U K I　No　Y O U　Ni　Na K U N At Te K U Re Re Ba

If only they could melt away like snow,

Na Y Am I　Mo　Na K U Na Ru No Ni

I would have no more worries

Y O K U B O U　S U Be Te　Ga　H O N No U　Na Ra

If all desires are instincts,

K O No　K I Mo C H I　Mo　H O N No U　Na No

Then these feelings are instincts too

I S S O　S U Be Te　K I Es At Te K U Re Re Ba

If only they would all just go away,

K I Re I　Ni　Na K U Na Ru No Ni

I could lose them and be clean

K I S S　S U Ru　Y At S U Ra　Ni　Dy N Am I Te　（Ba K U S At S U）

To the guys who try to kiss me, I gift dynamite (fatal explosion)

I I　F U N I K I　No　Re N C H U U　S H Ar K　At Ta C K　（Ta Be C H Au）

To the lot of them who try to set the mood, I gift a shark attack (eat up)

B O C C H I　I Ga I　W O　K U C H I K U　Si Te

Let’s exterminate everyone but the loners

At Ar As H I I　K I Ne N Bi　S H U K U F U K U　Si Y O O

And celebrate this new holiday[2]

I　W I S H　Y O U　Ag Re At　Cr I S Tm As

I wish you a great Christmas

H　No　Na I　Cr I S Tm As

A sexless Christmas

Ts U N Ag At Ta　Te　Mo　As Ac H U N　Mo　Na I

No connected hands nor good morning kisses

He I O N　Na　Cr I S Tm As

A peaceful Christmas

I　W I S H　Y O U　Ag Re At　Cr I S Tm As

I wish you a great Christmas

H　N U K I　No　Cr I S Tm As

An unerotic Christmas

H Ag Es H I I　Y O Ru　Mo　Se I K O U I　Mo　Na I

No intense nights nor sexual acts

Se I Na Ru　I　Lu V　Y O U

A holy I love you

W At As H I　No　S U Be Te　Ga　O N Ga K U　Na Ra

If all I am is music,

K O No　K I Mo C H I　Ga　O N Pu　Na No

Then these feelings are the notes

U Ta U　No　W O　Y Am Er U　Na Ra Ba　Mo U

If I were to stop singing,

K I Re I　Ni　W As U Re Ra Re Ru　No

I could forget them and be clean

Ni N Ge N　S U Be Te　W O　Ba K U S At S U　Si Te

I’ll bomb all of the humans,

W At As H I　I Ga I　I Na K U Na Ru

And there will be no one left but me

B O C C H I　Ni　N At Te Mo　U Ta　W O　Ga Nb Ar U　Na Ra

Even if I’m alone, as long as I dedicate myself to singing,

W At As H I　Ga　Pr In Ce S S　Na No

I am a princess[3]

I C H At S U K U　Y At S U Ra Ni　V Ir U S　（Bi O　He I K I）

To the guys who try to flirt with me, I gift a virus (bio weapon)

Pa Co Pa Co　S U Ru　F U U F U　Ni　La Se Rg U N　（S H U N S At S U）

To the couples having sex, I gift a laser gun (instant kill)

K U S At Ta　Ni N Ge N　Ba K U Ge K I　Si Te

Let’s bomb all of the degenerate humans

At Ar As H I I　K I Ne N Bi　S H U K U F U K U　Si Y O O

And celebrate this new holiday

​​I　W I S H　Y O U　Ag Re At　Cr I S Tm As

I wish you a great Christmas

H　No　Na I　Cr I S Tm As

A sexless Christmas

Ts U N Ag At Ta　Te　Mo　As Ac H U N　Mo　Na I

No connected hands nor good morning kisses

He I O N　Na　Cr I S Tm As

A peaceful Christmas…

I　W I S H　Y O U　Ag Re At　Cr I S Tm As

I wish you a great Christmas

H　N U K I　No　Cr I S Tm As

An unerotic Christmas

H Ag Es H I I　Y O Ru　Mo　Se I K O U I　Mo　Na I

No intense nights nor sexual acts

Se I Na Ru　I　Lu V　Y O U

A holy I love you

O N Na No K O　H Am In Na　Pr In Ce S S　Na No

Every girl is a princess

K I Y As U K U　F U Re Ru Na　K I Mo C H I　W Ar Uuu

Don’t touch me so freely, it feels disgustiiing...

K I Re I　Na　H O U Se K I　Ni　F U Re Ru　Y O U Ni

Touch me as if I were an eye-clean[4] gemstone

Te I Ne I　Ni　Si Na I　Y At S U　Cr I B O C C H I

A guy who isn’t courteous will be spending Christmas alone

I　W I S H　Y O U　Ag Re At　Cr I S Tm As

I wish you a great Christmas

H　No　Na I　Cr I S Tm As

A sexless Christmas

Ts U N Ag At Ta　Te　Mo　As Ac H U N　Mo　Na I

No connected hands nor good morning kisses

He I O N　Na　Cr I S Tm As

A peaceful Christmas

I　W I S H　Y O U　Ag Re At　Cr I S Tm As

I wish you a great Christmas

H　N U K I　No　Cr I S Tm As

An unerotic Christmas

H Ag Es H I I　Y O Ru　Mo　Se I K O U I　Mo　Na I

No intense nights nor sexual acts

Se I Na Ru　I　Lu V　Y O U

A holy I love you

—

Notes:

[1] This song’s gimmick is based on the periodic table of elements. The lyrics are stylized in romaji and elemental symbols are used to spell out the words. This also results in some creative liberties for spellings of words like “Cristmas (Christmas)” and “luv (love)”, as well as deviations from typical romaji spellings.

[2] 記念日 (kinenbi) refers to a day for commemoration or an anniversary/anniversary-like holiday. What she’s trying to get across here is that this day will now be celebrated going forward as a holiday to commemorate the day she killed all of the humans.

[3] This is possibly referring to Miku’s common association with the word 歌姫 (utahime), which means “diva”, but can be most literally translated to “singing princess”.

—

100% (Looking-glass Syndrome[1])

いっくよー！

Let’s go!

最近彼の視線が　熱い気がする 

Lately, I’ve felt a passionate intensity in his gaze

もしかして最近私　かわいくなった？ 

Could it be that I’ve gotten prettier recently?

そういえばこのごろ胸が　キツい気がする 

Come to think of it, my chest area has been feeling a bit tighter these days

やだ困っちゃうどうしよう　明日起きてブラが入らない

Oh no, I’ll be in trouble if I wake up tomorrow and my bra doesn’t fit

このまま順調に大きくなったら　ボタンはじけちゃうかもね 

If they continue to grow steadily, one of my buttons might pop

男の子なんて単純なんだから　一網打尽

Since boys are all so simpleminded, let’s make a wholesale arrest[2]

この胸の間に　何かをはさみこみたいと 

They want to put something between these breasts

みんなが思ってるのは　100% 確実 

That’s what everyone’s thinking, I’m 100% certain

このくびれに手をあて　激しく上下させたいと 

They want to place their hands on the curves of this waist and vigorously move me up and down

みんなが思ってるのは　100% 気のせいかな？

For everyone to be thinking the same thing, it has to 100% be my imagination, right?

笑顔でお釣りをくれる　コンビニのバイト 

The convenience store employee, who gives me change with a smile

何度も髪をさわってくる　カリスマ美容師 

The charismatic hairdresser, who repeatedly touches my hair

大きな声で名前を呼ぶ　担任の教師 

The homeroom teacher, who calls out my name in a loud voice

みんなみんながっつきすぎよ　あわてなくても逃げないから

Guys, guys, you’re all too eager; there’s no need to panic, I’m not going to run away

世界中の男の子はみんな　私に夢中なのね 

All of the boys in the world are entranced by me

ああ、なんて罪作りな女なの？　申し訳ないわ

Ah, what a sinful woman, huh? My sincerest apologies

この胸の谷間に　何かをブチまけたいと 

They want to splatter something onto this cleavage

みんなが思ってるのは　100% 真実 

That’s what everyone’s thinking, it’s 100% true

気がつくとあの人と　いつも目があってるから 

Because I’m constantly finding myself unintentionally making eye contact with that person

間違いなく私に　100% 惚れてるでしょ？

Without a doubt, he has 100% fallen in love with me, hasn’t he?

本当は私だってわかってるのよ？ 

The truth is, even I can understand that much, y’know?

気のせいかも？

Maybe it’s just my imagination?

気のせいじゃないわ！　私の未来だもの 

It’s not my imagination! It’s my future

見返してやるわ　覚えてなさい！　ちくしょう！ 

I’ll show you who’s boss[3], remember that! You brutes[4]!

この胸は一分咲き　今日も豆乳を飲むわ 

This chest is in full bloom, I’ll be drinking soy milk again today

恋をする根性で　100% Fカップよ

I’m 100% an F-cup with the guts to fall in love

ふぅ、ありがと！ペコリ♪

Phew, thanks! Bow♪

—

Notes:

[1] The secondary title of the song being “Looking-glass Syndrome” is possibly referencing what is more commonly known as “Alice in Wonderland Syndrome”, and/or trying to give an impression of metaphorically using a looking glass to peer into someone’s thoughts. The narrator here does not actually have Alice in Wonderland Syndrome, but more likely experiences body image distortion and body dysmorphia regarding her chest.

[2] A “wholesale arrest” refers to the act of arresting a large number of people all at once. It’s typically used for apprehending multiple suspects who were all present at the scene of a crime. The usage here basically entails arresting all of the guys together at once for having sexual thoughts about the narrator.

[3] 見返して (mikaeshite) means to prove yourself superior over someone, prove someone to be wrong about you, show someone what you’re really capable of, etc. I didn’t know how to word this line in a way that clearly gets the meaning across without sounding awkward.