location: narnia

“Okay, I meant prison, not Caston county jail.  That’s practically a spa retreat.” he snorted, forgetting about Ben’s infamous night in jail.  “Mhm, okay, bud, whatever helps you sleep at night.  God forbid you drop the soap.”

“Not my fault you didn’t specify,” Benjamin huffed, and decided against saying something about the spa comment. “Still more than you can say. I -- shut up, you should hold onto your soap. They would eat you up.”

“You wouldn’t last a second in jail, Ben, maybe stick to stealing from your parents’ liquor cabinet, and not a liquor store.” he teased, nudging him with his elbow as they pulled out of the cul-de-sac.

“Oh, ha ha, very funny,” he replied, rolling his eyes. “And excuse me, but I would last for ... well, at least I would last longer than you would in jail. And in case you’ve forgotten, I actually did survive.” 

Cullen was a bit taken aback by his greeting, or rather, lack thereof, and raised his eyebrows visibly at Ben.  He forgave him though (he always would), as he knew that with Ben currently unable to stay at the frat house through the summer, that meant staying at home with his parents, so his bad mood was understandable.  Although, the one thing Cullen didn’t understand was why Ben didn’t have his own place yet.  Even if his parents wouldn’t pay for it (which, why wouldn’t they?  They didn’t disapprove of Ben.  Yet.), with his job at Gore Records, Cullen figured Ben could probably afford a place in Mist at the very least.  He had tried pressing the blonde on the subject before, but he always had some excuse, or clammed up completely, and Cullen just couldn’t crack that shell.  He always seemed uptight and grumpy when he stayed with his parents, so why wouldn’t he want a place of his own?  One he could turn into whatever he wanted, which with his eye for interior decorating, would probably be something amazing.

But Cullen knew this weekend, that wasn’t a subject that needed to be broached.  Both of them needed the release, needed a fun and simple weekend away from all their stressors.  “Jesus Grumpy, did you rob a god damn liquor store?” Cullen asked, commenting on the cacophonous clanking of bottles emanating from his bag before he pulled away from the curb and onto the street, officially starting their weekend.

“Sorry,” muttered Ben, having noticed Cullen’s reaction to his rather unpleasant greeting. This was supposed to be a fun weekend and while his family had made him want to rip his eyes out, Cullen had done no such thing. Quite the opposite actually. While waiting for the date of their trip, the thought of the two of them going to a festival together was one of the few things that made him stay sane while having to live with his parents. Gosh, how he hated it. Or rather, how he hated it while they were there. There was nothing wrong with the house. He rather enjoyed spending time there, like most people probably would, with the house having a home gym in the basement, a swimming pool and other luxuries. He just couldn’t help feeling trapped and restricted whenever his parents were home. And during the summer, they were, unfortunately, home more than the rest of the year. Sometimes he considered getting his own place, just his, away from his parents, away from the frat house. Just his. He could do whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted it and with whoever he wanted without worrying that anyone would walk in on him. At the same time the thought scared him a little, and he wasn’t sure if his parents would help him financially. His dad especially made it pretty clear he was glad Benjamin was living in the frat house with the others, as it taught him “great values and helped him build important relationships”. As if.

Ben sighed with relief as they drove out of the driveway and away from the house. Finally. “Yeah. Thought I’d get have one more adventure before this one,” he said sarcastically, then grinned at Cullen. “It just sounds worse than it is because it’s all glass bottles - even the beers. --- Okay, maybe I brought a lot. Just, you know, making sure. I don’t know. At least I got some water too. Uh, also glass.” 

@benjamingdi @lukaswrites

Cullen wasn’t sure how he had done it, but somehow Ben had convinced his boss at Gore records to pay for two tickets to some music festival.  Something about market research?  Or at least Cullen was pretty sure that’s what Ben had said.  Regardless, Cullen was excited to spend some time with Ben, especially after his second disappearing act.  He had come back for the job at Yordan, only to be shot down because of Ben’s own fucking father.  Of course Cullen would’ve loved to stay in Caston, but he had gotten an offer for a temporary job in San Bernadino, and he had to take it.  Which meant leaving Ben while they were in the middle of doing…Well, whatever they were doing.  But then Ben had called him excitedly on the phone, letting him know that the same position he had applied for was open once again, something about the person they hired having a bit of a problem with putting stuff up their nose, so Cullen was back.  Again.  And he hoped for good this time.

He was going to hear about the job on Monday, so Cullen was infinitely grateful to Ben for asking him to tag along on the festival trip, to distract himself from his impending future.  He wouldn’t say he didn’t also enjoy getting to spend time with Ben.  It felt like every time they ended up getting close again, something always pulled them apart.  Their own emotions, time, distance, families, it was always something.  And even just as friends, Cullen was glad to get a chance to hang out with him again, see what he was up to.

His knee bounced and his fingers tapped the wheel with excitement as he waited for Ben to lug his shit down his long driveway.  How much stuff was he bringing anyways?  Cullen was the one who was bringing all the camping gear.

Honking playfully, Cullen stuck his head out the car window.  “Hurry it up, Westwood, will ya?  It’ll be September before we get there at this rate!”

“I’ll be back on Tuesday!” Benjamin shouted to his mom for the fourth time that day, annoyed she never actually listened to him even though she was the one who asked the question in the first place. “Oh, okay! Have fun, Benjamin! Say hi to Thomas!” he heard his mother shout back at him. In return he yelled “Yeah!” before shutting the front door after him. The extra force was not indended, but made him seem extra sour. He’d been so happy - oh so happy indeed! - for being able to invite Cullen with him to a music festival sponsored by his boss. He still wasn’t quite sure how he’d managed, but perhaps it was because not many others had been able to justify the reason behind it all. Why his reasoning was better than others he wasn’t quite sure, but apparently it worked. In an email he’d told his boss how this festival in particular was very popular among young adults around his own age and how he would love to go to do further research for their next projects. However, he wasn’t very keen on going alone so he told his boss it was a lot easier for him and less suspicious if he had someone with him. If he was alone people would probably assume he was either an agent or a reporter.

For some reason his boss had liked this and thus given him two tickes to the festival. Already three of his co-workers had tried to convince him to ask them to come with him, but he already knew who to ask. He’d known from the very start. So when Cullen agreed to go with him he was glowing, he was over the top, and if he didn’t have to wait for the actual date of the festival he would be ready to go in an instant. Even though things had been sort of ... slow, and a bit weird lately, seeing as Cullen had to leave. Again. But he was back and for now that was all that mattered. Ben grabbed his bag and his backpack and went down to the car. Sure, he didn’t have any of the camping gear, but his bag was clinking from the bottles of liqour crashing into each other.

“You really don’t have to shout, I’m sure everyone can har you,” he mumbled in low growl. He knew it sounded a bit harsh, but his parents had driven him up the wall lately while all he’d cared about was the trip with Cullen. Which he hadn’t exactly been able to talk about much around the house and thus let to him telling his family he was going to the festival with Thomas, an old friend his parents loved and who he knew was on vacation. He got down to the car and started to load his things into the car. “Will you stop yelling now? I’m here, got the stuff so let’s just go,” he added, wanting to get away from his family as soon as possible.

Cullen could’ve sworn he almost…—No, he wouldn’t have, would he?  For a split second, Cullen was almost sure that the blonde was going to lean in and kiss him.  For a split second, they were so close, but then he was sitting in the chair, and it was as if nothing happened.  Sometimes, the confusion Cullen had about the two of them made him dizzy.  It was so odd, despite never saying they were anything but friends, Cullen honestly felt like Ben acted more like a boyfriend than any of his previous boyfriends had (although, that could be saying something about Cullen’s past relationships).  Maybe it was the way they talked, the way they goofed around, or the way Cullen felt this immediate sense of ease and belonging when the two hung out.—-God, he needed to snap out of it.

“Hey man, no worries.  I may be a lone man adrift in the land of the unemployed, but I understand.  Sometimes time just slips away from you, right? — What’re you working on anyways?” he asked, but before Ben had a chance to answer Cullen spoke up once more.  “Oh, right, this is for you.” he said, nudging Ben’s normal coffee order in his direction.  

“You'll get something soon enough. Have you heard anything about the job yet? --- You know, worst case, I can pay you to be my private tutor. Technically I think I owe you a lot of money,” Benjamin pointed out, though jokingly. If Cullen didn’t get a job and was in need of money he didn’t mind helping out, and he had spent a lot of time helping him with school (among other things) so it would be fair, but he wasn’t sure if Cullen would accept it. If he had been in that situation he didn’t think he’d accept it. Then again he wasn’t usually very good at accepting help when it was offered to him.

When Cullen asked about work, he rolled his eyes. He was about to open his mouth and complain about the stupid CD, but was interrupted. “Oh - thanks.” Sending him a quick smile, he grabbed his coffee and blew on it before taking a sip. Before he tried to reply to the question about work again, he let out a deep sigh. “Alright, so. One of the bosses had this brilliant idea that we try making one of these .. collection CD with various artists on. Which is okay. So we’re making one for Valentine’s Day with a bunch of love songs on them - makes sense since it’s coming up. But guess who has to help out? Me! Guess who didn’t want to help out? Also me. Jesus Christ. And we’re having some local singers come do their version of the songs, which is why it’s much more work than just picking out some songs. They’re supposed to hit the stores on the 12th, so the marketing department has been working their asses off the past weeks too.”

moodboard:

@benjamingdi

His fingers tapped an unsteady beat on the laminated wood of the table as he waited for his…Friend?  God, why was he so high strung?  It was just Ben.  But maybe, that was the issue.  It was Ben.  Cullen had been such a mess since coming back home, his feelings stronger than when he had left.  Seems like distance really does make the heart grow fonder.  Cullen was the sort of person who fell hard and fast but then fell out of it just as quick.  He was almost sure that once he went to Sacramento, got a taste of the people out there, he’d forget about Ben in the romantic sense, and they’d go back to being friends.  But upon getting back and seeing the blonde in person rather than through face time, his heart squeezed in his chest, and his stomach fluttered.  What in the hell was that about?  He had been infatuated before, but this wasn’t that, and that made him nervous.

His eyes couldn’t help but take note of all the pink and red decorations hung around the coffee shop.  God, was it almost Valentine’s day already?  The fast approaching holiday only served to remind him how…undefined everything was.  His future career?  Undefined, stagnant.  His relationship with Ben?  Undefined, stagnant.  He needed to start making moves in all aspects of his life.

The pink and red everywhere made him want to flee the city - except that probably didn’t help, because the rest of the country was just as into Valentine’s Day as Caston was. He was running late, and the decorations everywhere didn’t help with his annoyance. The big day was three days away, but Ben was already fed up with it. At work they’d worked on a new album to release especially on Valentine’s with a bunch of local singers, and even though he was just an assistant, he’d been forced to help out finding songs for the album. Not just that, but as the day got closer, everyone was talking about dates, love, boyfriends and girlfriends ... and Ben had none of it. Well, that wasn’t entirely correct. He had Cullen. Who was his ... good friend. Close friend. Literally close to him. Sometimes so close they even touched. With their lips.

It was terrifying, because Ben was certain all his (confusing) feelings for Cullen would disappear once the guy moved away from the city, and stayed away for almost a year. That should break down the .. whatever they had. Instead he felt an intense longing after him every time they texted or face timed each other. After Cullen’s return they had somehow managed their way back to almost the exact place they were before he left. Which didn’t help Ben and his confused mind. As he finally opened the doors to the cafe, he searched around and spotted Cullen not too far from the entrance. “Fuck, sorry. Work was hell,” Ben apologized as he rushed over and grabbed a chair opposite of him. A sudden - and strange - instinct wanted him to lean over and kiss him, but naturally, as they were out in public, he didn’t. Also, what the fuck was with him.

❝ Your funeral. ❞ he muttered, turning his attention to his own drink. He still couldn’t stand the taste of alcohol after Lynn’s death, but it was just normal on the force, and he was trying to be normal.

"How did you even notice? Have you been staring at me this whole time? That's kinda creepy, dude." He couldn't help it with the comment. Maybe it was because his friend was busy talking to some girl he found and he needed company, either way Laz would have to do.

Rowan’s eyes followed Ben’s form covertly.  Had he even noticed him?  Was it arrogant to question if he hadn’t how he had managed it?  The hair was a fairly big giveaway, after all.  Although, with the sway in his step, Rowan realized he could’ve walked right past an elephant and he may not have noticed.  He figured that his old friend had probably found himself a corner booth, as the only reason you came to a bar drunk was to become even more so, right?  Tapping the bar to get his acquaintance’s attention he motioned to his books and scraps of bar food “Can you…” before he finished the man was nodding, understanding Rowan’s unasked question of if he could look after the redhead’s belongings.  It was only as he was broken out of his stupor did he realize just how badly he needed to use the bathroom.  Three root beers could do that to a person.  His eyes scanned the seats and booths he walked past, hoping yet also dreading seeing the familiar face of his old friend.  He wanted to know where he had situated himself so he could avoid the area, but he also was worried that seeing each other could prompt a repeat of the coffee shop.  He was relieved as the elevator entered his line of sight that he hadn’t caught a glance of Ben yet.  It was then with closing doors that he realized he needed to pick up the pace a bit unless he wanted to wait for it to come back up again.  Picking his pace up to a light jog he just barely managed to stick his hand in the door to stop it from closing.  But upon entering, he wished he had been just a few seconds slower.  “Shit.” he cursed under his breath as he eyed up his fellow passenger, the same exact person he had been trying to avoid.

It shouldn't take so long for an elevator to get from one floor to another, but for Benjamin it unmistakably felt way too long. Not that he was in a hurry, but he hated waiting and besides, what if Rowan decided to head this way and they ended up bumping into each other? Having to start a conversation? If he was going to apologize he thought it would be for the best if he hadn't been drinking first. Finally he heard a ding and the doors to the elevator opened. "Finally," he grumbled and pushed the button with the number 2 on it as he entered. Leaning against the wall he picked up his phone to check for any texts, but looked up right away when he heard someone stop the doors from closing. The figure was impossible not to recognize and while he hoped Rowan hadn't noticed who he was sharing an elevator with, he knew the chances were slim. It was just one floor, they didn't have to speak during the few seconds it took them to get from A to B. He returned his attention to his mobile, trying to distract himself from his old friend and holding his tongue in his place. Suddenly, mid-way up to the second floor the elevator stopped and the lights went out. "What the hell?" Ben muttered and looked up from his phone again. The lights returned rather quickly, but the elevator still didn't move. Ben tried pushing the button for the second floor again, but nothing happened. He tried the one to make the doors open, but still nothing happened. "Are you actually fucking serious?" The outburst was more to himself than to anyone else, but it was impossible not to hear and so he threw a quick glance in Rowan's direction to see how he reacted to all this. If he reacted at all. Maybe he didn't care.

“I couldn’t do that man. I appreciate it but like, that’s not right.”

“It can be my birthday gift to you. --- But I mean, you don’t have to, it was just a suggestion. You can have it at my place unless you want to, I don’t know, have a mini golf party or something.”

“Hey, like I said, you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.  But..–” he paused, unsure if he’d be stepping over the line.  But he figured, that if it all sounded right, he did have a fair bit of experience on being on the other side. “But it sounds like you should probably apologize to him.  I mean, will it make everything go back to the way it was? No, I doubt it but…Well, if Sonny had apologized to me, it would’ve gone a long way.” He assured.  “And I’m sure you’d feel better, after.  Horrible during, probably, but better after.”

❝ Assuming you’re even old enough to drink, you had your back turned on it. For awhile. It may have been drugged. ❞

“Of course I’m old enough to drink,” he shot back, offended that anyone suggested he looked younger than his age. "--- Oh. In this place? Nah, I’m sure it’s fine, but thanks for your concern.” He took a sip from his drink while still keeping his eyes fixed on Lazarus, just to be an ass.

“Rent a place? How much money do you think i have man?”

“Hey -- I said I’d help you, didn’t I? I could help you with that too, man, don’t worry.”